Monthly Archives: April 2015

Are You Ignoring Her Personality?

Don't Ignore What's Inside

Look A Little Deeper

When I was a kid, sometimes my parents would get those boxes of expensive chocolates.

I don’t know if you’re familiar, but they were all pretty similar in appearance. Outside they were all pretty round, some darker, and some lighter. But inside, some of them had some pretty gross stuff, at least from a kids perspectives.

Which meant that my parents always ended up with a box of chocolates that had small bites taken out of them.

When guys see a gorgeous girl across the room, they are making a LOT of assumptions about her. Her personality, her beliefs, the way she talks, her habits. Pretty much EVERYTHING about her, except her looks.

Which is why it seems absolutely nuts to nervous walking and talking to her, at least from a rational perspective.

If you stop and think about how many gorgeous girls you’d have to talk to find one that you really click with, it would seem like talking to cute girls would be a chore, rather than something to be scared of.

If you’ve ever been in a really bad relationship and wanted to get out but didn’t know how, you know that is a very, very unpleasant situation to be in. Especially if you and her share the same social circle. A literal nightmare.

Yet guys charge in full speed ahead thinking ALL they need is a girl that’s physically attractive, and everything else will take care of itself.

This is not a very effective strategy to say the least.

Now, I know this makes total sense on paper. But when you’re in the mix and that cutie is making those flirty eyes at you, all this rational understanding is going to fly out the window.

Does this mean you’re back to where you started?

You don’t have to be. In order to have a more curious mindset (rather than a desperate mindset) when approaching is to simply get a lot of experience with a lot of girls.

Specifically with a deep, experiential understanding that many girls will simply disqualified.

How can you generate this feeling?

Simply talk to as many girls as you can. Don’t hit on them. Don’t number close them. Just short, polite, conversations. Long enough to know that girls are people, just like you. Some are smart, some are dumb. Some are nice, some are mean. Some are outgoing, some are shy.

The more “data” you get, the easier it will be.

This will show you how:

Girlfriend Generator

Open Ancient Energies Of Life

Science Or Magic?

Science Or Magic?

It’s been said that science that is beyond the current level of understanding will seem like magic.

It’s also been said that all things MUST be explained by science.

One of Einstein’s famous quotes is “God does not play dice with the universe.”

Which means the entire universe is governed by laws, not by some kind of random chance.

However, it’s also pretty clear that science can only explain so much. Beyond that, it’s pretty much guesswork.

Things like the origins of the universe, the nature of space-time, and the strange “missing matter” of the universe.

All these things make the smartest scientist on Earth utterly confused.

Science can be fun, but it can also be a roadblock.

If you need to understand everything about everything, you’d never leave your house.

Imagine forcing yourself to understand the entire mechanics of your car before driving anywhere.

Of course, understanding it to a certain point is necessary. Otherwise you’d run out of gas, wear your tires bald, or let the engine seize up from not changing the oil.

But beyond that, just get in the thing and drive.

There are a lot of useful metaphors to describe things that would be beyond human understanding if we tried to describe them accurately.

The famous saying from NLP, “The map is not the territory,” is true. But often times, the map is all we’ve got.

If you’re going from point A to point B, it’d be kind of silly to travel all the different routes just to find the quickest. Having a map would be MUCH easier.

And because the map can ONLY approximate the territory, it’s much like metaphors we use to describe reality.

So long as they work, and get us what we want, they’re plenty good enough.

Often times when scientists are trying to figure something out, they’ll go through  many “models.”

They’ll come up with a theory of what they think is going on, test it out, and see how well their model holds up.

Us non-scientist humans have been doing that since the dawn of time.

Trying to describe the vast mysteries of the universe in easy to understand metaphors, or “maps” of the territory.

So long as these maps get us to where we want to go, they’re perfect.

Once such “map” is the idea Kundalini Energy. The life force that, when present, makes everything smooth, natural and easy. Fully awake, open and actualized. 

When closed off, it’s common to feel lack, fear and frustration.

How exactly does it work? What are the equations that describe it?

Nobody really knows.

But it’s been working for thousands of years, and it can work for you.

Open Yours:

Kundalini Activator

Sorting Is Easier Than Seduction

Sort Don't Seduce

Don’t Turn Her Into Something She’s Not

It’s really, really easy to get your sites set on one girl. You meet her, have a conversation or two, and your caveman brain starts spinning. She seems perfect. You start to imagine a future together. If only you could figure out how to make it happen.

There’s two ways that guys sometimes handle something like this. One is they continue to interact her, but never really make any kind of move. I’m not talking a physical move, but they never ask her on a date, or talk to her so she knows the guy’s interested.

They sit around and hope something “just happens.”

Of course, this will quickly put you in the “friend zone” from which there’s really no escape. Sure it happens, but it’s not a good idea to depend on it.

The other thing they do is suddenly confess their feelings for her. Tell her they love her with all their hearts. This usually doesn’t work either. Way too much, way too soon.

Both of these strategies are designed to protect the male ego. They are afraid of rejection, so they never make a move and pretty much put themselves in the friend zone.

Or they want to get it over as quickly as possible, so they dump a bunch of emotions on her.

If you’ve done either of these, you know they don’t make things any better.

From an objective standpoint, going down the middle is clearly the best route. Express your intentions, but very slowly, in a way that’s easy for her to reciprocate.

If you’ve never done this before, it can be very, very difficult. Every single step forward means risking rejection. She may give you her number, but she might not date you. She might date you once, but not twice. She might be willing to date you, but not get physical. She might let you get to first based, but not second. And on and on.

As you can imagine, the more experience you get, the easier it will be. But this kind of gets rid of the notion of having it go perfectly with the first girl you ever lay eyes on.

This requires a completely different mindset. One is that finding your dream girl is not a seduction process, but a sorting process.

It’s much, much easier to find somebody who likes you just the way you are, then taking some girl who maybe likes you and spending all kinds of time, money and energy chasing her.

One thing that will help is to simply practice flirting with girls. Only flirting. Not number closing or long drawn out conversations where you hope something eventually happens.

Short, harmless flirting with as many girls as you can.

Until talking to cute girls becomes second nature, and you don’t freak out when you find “The One.

Develop Magnetic Congruence

Line Up Your Parts

Align Thyself

One of the most powerful things a person can do is be congruent.

I’m sure you’ve heard this before, so it may not sound like anything new.

But one thing about any kind of self-development is it’s easy to get trapped in a world of vague words that don’t really mean anything.

One thing you learn if you study NLP is something called the “Meta Model.”

This is a set of language patterns designed to turn the vague into the specific.

As you can probably guess, they don’t work very well in polite conversation. Whenever we’re talking to others we are going to be necessarily vague.

If we show up and start asking “How specifically? Who specifically? Why specifically?” people are going to get pretty annoyed.

But when understanding ideas that can help us more easily get what we want, getting specific is necessary.

So back to that cool but vague word, “congruent.”

What EXACTLY does it mean?

In mathematics, it’s when two angles are the same.

But what does it mean in a social setting?

When somebody is behaving or communicating “congruently” what are they doing, specifically?

Think of the “parts” theory. We all have different parts. When we’re thinking about what to do on a Friday night, for example, part of us may want to go out, while another part of us wants to stay in.

If we are ever conflicted, in any behavior or communication, we are NOT congruent.

One way to tell when people are lying, for example, (certainly not foolproof) is when they break off eye contact, or become closed off physically.

They may not even know they’re doing it. They may even believe what they are saying, on one level.

But on another level, it feels “wrong.” 

If you’re in a relationship (and you’re paying attention) you can usually tell when somebody is not being congruent. They may do a good job of faking it, but it’s still pretty obvious.

(“Do you love me?” “Uh, yea, sure!”)

One of the most common ways we all display incongruence is when part of us wants something, but another part of us is afraid.

We ask our boss for a raise, for example. We are one hundred percent sure we WANT the raise, but when we ask, it’s tough to speak confidently. Part of us is afraid to ask, because we might get rejected.

Same with talking to attractive people, speaking up in meetings or in groups, or any other time we want to express ourselves.

As you can guess, one the biggest killers of congruence is fear. Fear of rejection, fear of dismissal, fear of being left behind.

The good news is that unless we’re facing down an angry tiger, our fears of false.

How do we get rid of them?

By getting in touch with our higher selves.

Get Started:

Kundalini Activator

How To Kill Desperation

End This Attraction Killing Curse

Easy Daily Practice

Many people talk about the scarcity mindset, when it comes to meeting girls.

In general terms, when you don’t have a lot of options, you’re going to place a lot of value on the options you do have. If you’ve been out of work for a while, you’ll take any job, no matter how horrible, so long as you start earning some cash that will keep you off the streets.

If you’re starving, and all you’ve got is a box of crackers, those crackers are going to be the most delicious thing you’ve ever eaten.

With girls, it works the same way. If you haven’t been involved for a while, any interaction you get from a girl is going to make it seem like she’s your only chance for romantic and sexual happiness.

To make it worse, since humans spent a long time living in small groups, your inner caveman is programmed to really believe she may be your only chance.

So speaking in terms of scarcity mindset or abundance mindset is pretty useless unless it’s actually true.

Meaning if you really haven’t had much luck recently, no matter how much you build up your confidence in your mind, she’s going to seem WAY more important to you that she really is. Which means you’ll overanalyze everything, be terrified of upsetting her, and pretty much do anything to please her. None of which are very attractive.

Clearly, this can set up a huge negative feedback loop. The more desperate you act, the less attractive you’ll be, which means you’ll be even LESS likely to find somebody.

What’s the answer? Repeat “sex and romance are abundant” a million times every night?

Nope.

The simple, easy and straightforward answer is to simply get into the habit of talking to every single cute girl you see.

Or at least making eye contact and smiling at them.

Sure, it may seem hard at first. But if you suck it up and make this a habit, that feeling of desperation will slowly fade.

Pretty soon you will believe, in a deep psychological and instinctive level, that pretty girls really ARE in abundance.

Now, some guys will do this, and then stop when they start dating somebody.

Don’t make this mistake. This isn’t the greatest metaphor, but it’s helpful.

Think of a martial artist. He trains every single day, to prepare for the rare tournament. If he does well in a tournament, does he stop training? Nope. Never.

Think of any relationship you end up in as an ongoing tournament. Not that you’ll be fighting, but that you need to maintain that “abundance mindset” to keep you relaxed, confident and real. Keep away that desperation.

Always be social. Always be outgoing. Make that who you REALLY are, not who you pretend to be.

The Wisdom Of Silence

Listen To Your Friend

Listen To Your Friend

There are many popular myths and stories that are metaphors for self discovery.

A young explorer leaves his home, searching the world for riches.

After his many adventures, he comes home, only to find the riches were there all along. Buried in the last place he’d think to look.

Dorothy was in Oz trying to get home. Battling villains, flying monkeys, and discovering the man behind the curtain (whom she thought held the key) was a fraud. Then she found the power return was with her the entire time.

Long ago, before humans were created, the gods had a problem. In the world was a great power, but they feared humans would misuse it.

No matter where they thought to hide it, they knew humans would find it. On top of the highest mountains, in the bottom of the deepest oceans.

All places men have been to.

Then they found the place we’d never look.

Within ourselves.

Many of us spend our entire lives looking “out there” for the answers. Relationship after relationship. Job after job. Hobby after hobby. City after city.

But the answer lies within.

It always has.

it’s been said that our biggest obstacle to discovering this is lies in our inability to sit with ourselves.

No TV, no smart phone, no music, no friends. Just sitting and listening to the quiet, inner silence.

A silence filled with infinite wisdom, compassion, and understanding.

Consider making it habit of sitting quietly, if only for a few moments, at least once a day.

Quiet your environment. Quiet your mind. Listen for the guidance of your inner sage.

That ancient energy that exists before thought, before awareness.

Before you.

If you make it a habit of cultivating this inner awareness, you may notice some wonderful surprises showing up in your life.

But then again, maybe they’re already there.

Find Them:

Kundalini Activator

How To Approach Girls In Public

Don't Be Shy!

Step Right Up!

Once I was at this party, taking to a lady friend of mind. She was pretty attractive, and would always get hit on by guys.

One guy came up, and said up front he wasn’t trying to hit on her.  Then he started asking her about her clothes, where she got them etc.  During the whole conversation (which didn’t really last that long) he mentioned three or four times that he wasn’t trying to hit on her.

Which meant that he was really worried that SHE would think he was trying to hit on her. Which meant he was likely, at least on a subconscious level, hitting on her.

Many guys share this same fear. They walk up to a girl, and they’ve somehow been taught they need to be ultra secretive with their intentions, because if she thinks he’s hitting on her, he’s toast. All the music will stop, the house lights will all shine on him, and every body will KNOW that was he was breaking some cardinal rule of social etiquette.

Luckily, this is all in your head (if you indeed feel this way). The truth is that most girls LOVE to be “hit on” by guys. At least guys that are normal, and can easily take “no” for an answer.

Another time I was at this bookstore, in the coffee shop section. There was a pretty cute girl sitting at the table in front of me. Some guy walked up, and didn’t even introduce himself, ask her name, or make any attempt to start a conversation. He just asked for her phone number. She was polite, not mean in the least, but said, “no thanks.”

He DIDN’T take it in stride. He stood there for at least another couple minutes asking why. The longer he stood there, the angrier he got.

Some guys feel ENTITLED to get phone numbers from girls, simply because they walk up and ask. They act like the universe (or somebody) owes them some kind of reward simply for asking.

Now, as this guy kept getting angrier and angrier, she kept getting more and more nervous. Finally he left, and she was understandably upset. From her perspective, all she wanted was to spend a relaxing day at the bookstore, but some guy ruined it for her.

Clearly, this is NOT the way to approach. 

What IS the way to approach?

Introduce yourself. Start a conversation. If she smiles while she’s talking to you, it’s probably safe to ask. If she says “no,” walk away.

If she says “yes,” get it, smile and walk away.

If you approach like this, either way she’ll be glad you did.

Do this with enough girls, and you’ll be dating your dream girl in no time.

Trust Your Inner Angel

Let Your Brilliance Shine

There Is Treasure!

Imagine if you went to a new job.

You asked your boss what you should do, and he showed you your work station.

Maybe the first couple weeks, it was kind of intimidating. But after than, it started to become routine.

After that, maybe pretty boring. Trading time for a paycheck.

Now, if you’re out of work, this may sound like a dream come true.

But if you’ve ever been in this position, it can make the days last a long, long time.

Especially if you go home every night, eat the same foods, watch the same TV shows.

Sure, if you’ve got kids, that’s a different story. Watching and helping them grow up can make even the most horrible job doable.

But even then it can feel like you’re stuck in a hopeless rut that will never end.

What if life were like that?

What if some angel or spirit came down from the heavens, and explained everything to you?

And after understanding it, life itself became as boring and unimaginative as that factory job.

That would most definitely suck.

One of the best things in life is looking forward to something. Especially something you’ve got to make or do, and you aren’t quite sure how it’s going to turn out.

Maybe going to a vacation spot for the first time, or going on a date with somebody for the first time.

If you’ve got a uni degree, that feeling of first leaving home to study is a pretty exciting adventure. Or if you’ve moved to a new city for a new job. Or even moving into a new apartment. (What will the neighbors be like?)

That excitement that’s kind of mix of happiness, nervousness, and a bit of anxiety.

THAT is the stuff of life.

We were meant to be explorers. Not necessarily of the world, but of our own capabilities and skills.

Of relationships, new and old.

You’ve got greatness within you. And no matter how much you discover, there’s always more.

What will you discover next?

Check This Out:

Kundalini Activator

Are You Wasting Too Much Time With Her?

Hold 'Em Or Fold 'Em?

Know When To Fold ‘Em

There’s a lot of things we humans do to cover up our fears and insecurities.

And since most guys will never really feel totally comfortable talking to gorgeous girls, the whole area of relationships is rife with self delusion.

One common lie guys tell themselves is they would go and talk to her, if they only knew what to say.

This makes them buy courses and programs that teach them what to say, how to act, what to wear.

But in reality, most of this is overkill. Stuff most people know already. But if guys admitted they know everything they needed already, they’d be faced with a cold harsh truth. That the only thing stopping him from going over there and talking to her is their own fears, anxieties, and insecurities.

The moment you fully acknowledge this, you’ll be WAY ahead of everybody else.

Another thing to understand is after you’ve talked to her, no matter HOW FAR you are in the relationship, when things go south, it’s not because you called at the wrong time, or you said the wrong thing. Once a girl starts to lose interest, guys slip back into the “what do I say” mindset.

As if her interest is going to suddenly reverse itself based on a couple of well-placed sentences.

They may even ask her directly, “Tell me what to do to win you back!” As if there’s a specific thing in her mind that she needs from you that will suddenly make you more attractive.

Unfortunately, this isn’t the case.

Which is good news.

Because when you accept this, you’ll stop wasting time on girls that simply aren’t into you.

Here’s another cold, harsh truth. No matter WHAT you do, say, wear or how you behave, most girls on planet Earth are simply NOT going to be into you.

Now, I know a lot of people who sell complicated courses on seduction will tell you that with the right set of techniques, you can pretty much seduce ANY girl you come across.

While you may be able to create INTEREST and maybe even ATTRACTION in a large number of girls,  you’ll only be able to KEEP THAT GOING, in very, very small number.

The way it works is that early on in the relationship, with the guy doing all the work, and saying all the stuff, and using all the techniques, all she has to do is sit back and enjoy her new found attraction. But the real test comes when she’s got to put in some effort to keep things going.

This will tell you if you two have got potential.

Instead of spending all your time and effort using fancy advanced technology to get a particular girl interested in you, it may be a better idea to get used to the idea of simply talking to a lot of girls, until you find one that’s got that natural interest in you.

The real you.

And is willing to work to maintain it.

Awaken Your Natural Learner

Strengthen Your Roots

Your Inner Genius Is Waiting

Learning is something that humans are pretty much born to do.

According to evolutionary biologists, long, long ago, something interesting happened.

Our brains kept getting bigger and bigger. Pretty soon, they got so big (compared to our body) that it became impossible for humans to be born fully formed.

Otherwise, we would have lost our ability to walk, since female hips (which means men’s as well) would had to have been HUGE.

So Mother Nature decided to do something different, since walking was pretty important to us.

We were born WAY LESS than fully formed.

Compared to all other mammals, humans spend WAY MORE time as kids and adolescents.

All other mammals are born, and quickly become full adults.

All other mammals are born with all kinds of instincts. 

Humans, on the other hand are born with tons of instincts as well. But we also have INFINITE learning capacity.

Now, some people say learning shuts off when we get to a certain age, but that’s simply not true.

What DOES happen is we move outside of our family into a different environment. We go from a loving, supportive family where learning is our ONLY goal, to a group of people we’re not related to.

Then learning takes a back seat to discipline, obedience, not rocking the boat, etc.

But that natural learner is still within you. Your brain didn’t suddenly reorganize its structure when you turned seven.

You left a supportive, everything-taken-care-of environment, where learning was safe, natural and supported.

You entered an environment that was sometimes hostile to learning.

Problem is, that since that was officially labeled as a “learning” environment, that’s where we draw our experiences and feelings from whenever the topic of learning comes up.

But it doesn’t have to be that way.

You can learn anything you want. All you need to do is re-create that supportive environment.

And as an adult, you can create it yourself.

How do you do that?

Relax, and release fear. Accept that you are OK. Accept that mistakes are natural and normal and NECESSARY for learning. Have fun. 

Get in touch with your higher self, the higher self that KNOWS everything is going to be OK.

You can do this when meditating on your Root Chakra.

When it’s closed off, the world can be a scary place. You feel fear, anxiety, worry. Money problems, shelter problems. The problems Napoleon Hill referred to in “Think and Grow Rich” as the big killers of wealth.

But when your Root Chakra is open, you’ll feel safe. Easy. Relaxed,

Back to your natural self. The part of you that wants to continue to explore the world, and learn.

This will help:

Kundalini Activator