Monthly Archives: March 2015

The Folly Of Chasing

Sometimes It's Better To Find Somebody Else

How Long Should You Pursue A Girl?

How do I get her to like me?

I get this question a lot. Most guys have got their eye on some girl, have had a bit of success, and then she pulls back. He, on the other hand, is still pining furiously for her, and will do anything (or so he says) to get her to “like him.”

Now, let’s think about what happens when a girl “likes” a guy. It’s pretty much a HUGE collection of unconscious processes that are a mix of ancient programming, childhood and cultural programming, as well as how and who she references within her social circle.

On a deep level, girls like guys who are leaders, who are self confident, genuinely kind, and have thick skin. The guy who can pretty much handle anything that comes up. Not the guy who shies away from a challenge. Not necessarily the guy who beats everybody up who challenges him, but the guy who KNOWS deep in his soul that any problem life gives him, he’ll deal with to his advantage, AND usually everybody else’s in one way or another.

On top of that, she’s going to be turned on by a guy who “reminds her” on a deep level of when she was a kid, and she was referencing some strong male adult role models, usually (hopefully!) her father, or older brothers.

On top of that, she’s going to be subconsciously referencing cultural icons, her peer group, who they like, and who they don’t like, etc.

If that’s not enough, she’s also going to have a conscious idea of who’d she’d like to end up with.

If she can find a guy that hits her triggers on all four of these levels, she’ll feel as though she’s found her prince charming, and she’ll literally follow him to the ends of the Earth.

You know in mathematics they can take this huge equation, and express one variable in terms of all the rest?

We can kind of do that here.

Instead of asking, “How can I get her to like me,” you can also ask, “How can I become her prince charming, and hit her levels of attraction on levels?”

Most guys foolishly believe there’s something they can say or do that will fit the bill.

Think of it this way. You’re having a dinner party. You spend hours cooking something. Your friends come over, and they don’t like the taste very much. They’re being polite, but you can tell they think it sucks.

So you call your cooking guru on the phone. You ask him or her, “What can I tell them that will make them like my cooking?”

After your cooking guru gets done laughing, she or he might tell you to tell them to come back next week, after you cook something different.

Here is the cold harsh truth about dating. If a girl doesn’t like you, there’s not much you can do. 

Of course, you should ALWAYS be improving yourself. Increasing your self confidence. Developing better and stronger beliefs. Developing your ability to create an awesome life for yourself.

But if one particular girl decides (on all four of those levels) that she doesn’t like you? 

It’s best to simply find somebody else.

Killer X-Ray Language Vision

See What They're Thinking

See Straight Into Their Brains

A few years ago there was this famous case with some guy who’s wife disappeared.

He was a pretty good looking guy, and his wife was pretty attractive.

They were both upstanding members of their neighborhood, and everybody jumped on board to support him.

He even gave a few news conferences, asking for help.

If you’ve seen the movie, “Gone Girl,” or read the book, it was kind of like that.

Only in real life, he killed his wife. And then he became famous for seeming so innocent and “victim-like” when he was really a stone cold killer.

What gave him away?

When the cops were talking to him, he slipped up. One little mistake in his language.

See, if you’re a guy who’s wife really disappeared, you’d like hold out hope she was still alive.

That’s what humans tend to do.

Not this guy. He knew she was gone, because he was the one who ended her.

He was describing her, her activities, and he slipped up and used the past tense, instead of the present tense.

Within the tens of thousands of words he spoke on TV, and to the cops in private, that one little mistake gave him away.

After that, when the cops KNEW he did it, it was just a matter of time before he cracked.

This is the power of language.

Most people see conversational hypnosis as a means to covertly put your ideas into the heads of others.

To be sure, that’s a very good way to use these patterns. Especially if you’ve got some really good ideas you KNOW your listener will appreciate.

But it’s also a great way to pay attention to the language of others, so you can see what’s REALLY on their minds, with X-ray vision.

Now, I’m not saying you should go out and start interrogating people. 

But consider how useful this would be if you were talking to a loved one, and they were saying one thing, but thinking something else.

Maybe they were afraid to ask for something, or too shy to say “no” to something.

These patterns would help you understand what was REALLY their minds, so you could help them express themselves in the way they REALLY wanted to.

I’m sure you can imagine how you could strengthen your relationships.

That’s what happens when you start learning these patterns, and more importantly, start doing the “drills” to learn them.

You’ll soon start to see whole new world, just beneath the surface structure words people are using.

To get started, check this out:

Covert Hypnosis

Are You Throwing Good Money After Bad?

Don't Turn An Innocent Flirtation Into An Emotional Bankruptcy!

How To Not Go Broke

Here’s a trading tip that can be very helpful. This only works if you’ve got some solid reasons for buying, know when you’ll get out, due to profits. Or know when you’ll get out, due to losses.

For example, no matter how you select investments, many traders have an 25/5 rule.

Meaning if they’re up 25%, they get out, no matter what.

If they’re down 5%, they get out, no matter what.

These are the two most crucial rules. According to these guys, if you follow these rules, no matter what, you can’t go wrong.

Just think about it. If you lose on 2 out of three trades, you’re still doing pretty good. Down five, down five, up twenty five. Not bad, if you can keep it up.

What’s it mean to chase good money with bad? You spend some cash, and you’re down five percent. If you’re a pro, you get out, and look for another trade. If you’re an amateur, you tell yourself every lie you can think of to keep throwing more money at your bad investment. Most guys would rather go broke than admit they were wrong.

The further down it goes, the more money you spend. Bad money chasing good.

As you can likely guess, getting out of a trade is just a fundamental skill as figuring what to buy and when. If you don’t know how to get out, you’ll go broke. Simple as that.

Think about this next time you’re chasing a girl that doesn’t really want to be chased.

Many guys meet a girl, it goes well, then they blow it. Doesn’t matter how they blow it, but they blow it.

They start texting, she doesn’t text back. They call, she doesn’t call back.

Then they wonder, “What can I do to fix this?’

Here’s how you “fix this.” Find somebody else.

She’s being as clear as she can be. She’s not interested in you. Stop wasting your time. It’s like chasing a stock that’s crashing below it’s 200 day moving average.

If she’s still interested in you, you’ll know. They’ll be no question. If you’re wondering, it’s a safe bet that she’s not.

But here’s some indicators, just in case. You text, and she doesn’t text back, you’re out. If you call, and she doesn’t call back, you’re out. If you talk to her and she’s not participating with any noticeable amount of energy or enthusiasm, you’re out.

Not all girls are going to like you. In fact, very few girls are going to like you more than simple politeness.

Get over it. You’re job as a man is to find the girls that DO like you. Not take the few that give you eye contact and try and turn them into your dream lovers.

So get busy sorting. Talk to girls. Ask for their number. Give them a call or two. Or a text or two if you’re too nervous. This should tell you all you need to know.

Only chase the girls that are clearly interested in you, and you’ll never go broke.

Get Their Brain To Fall In Love With You

Oh Baby! Keep Talking To Me!

More Secrets Of Mind Magic

One of the cool tricks about covert hypnosis is ambiguity.

This is when a word or phrase can mean a couple of different things.

Sometimes they use these as headlines to catch our attention.

“Eye Drops Off Shelf.”

Does this mean that eye drops can no longer be sold, or a bunch of eyeballs starting rolling around?

This kind of thing makes us do a double take, and catches our attention.

When you can do this conversationally, it works for a couple of reasons.

One is that your listener (or reader) will be trying to figure out which meaning you mean.

This will burn up brain power, decreasing the strength of their “conscious critic.”

That will voice inside our heads that’s always being ultra-skeptical of pretty much everything.

But this technique takes on a lot of power when you make BOTH meanings to sound good to the listener.

For example, If I said:

“You can make more money, and have more sex. And doing this will help you do just that.”

Now, when I said, “do just that,” which was I referring to? Making more money? Having more sex? Or both?

Your brain will likely bounce back and forth between those ideas (sex and money) a little bit longer than normal, which will cause some good feelings.

And if you do this, and keep on talking, and then do it some more, and then keep on talking, something pretty cool will happen.

Your listener (or reader) will start to subconsciously associate those good feelings with you and your message.

And since you know that our feelings drive most of our decisions, this will put you in a VERY good position.

And that is only ONE technique of MANY that is collectively referred to as “conversational hypnosis.”

To learn a LOT more, check this out:

Covert Hypnosis

Get In There And Get Some

Stop Waiting For A Perfect Opportunity

Stop Making Excuses

Most people have this belief, consciously or unconsciously, that their relationships with women is some kind of “skill” that once they “get” they don’t have to worry about “that part of their life” anymore.

Now, let’s think about this for a minute. Being able to deal with women, all women, is a skill that you need to learn only once. Like how to drive, how to bake a cake, how to dance, etc.

What happens when you get married? Does your wife never change? Does she not change her goals, beliefs, communication style, and what’s important to her?

What if you have a daughter? Will you know what to do, how to handle her own unique problems and difficulties, as they come up, since you’ve got your “women skills” all squared away?

Obviously not. Not even close. Even the most dedicated fathers and husbands NEVER feel like they are “on top of things.”

So if you’re looking for some quick magic system that will get the girl, so you can go back to whatever you were doing before, you’re going to be looking for a while. Like forever.

The truth is that all human relationships, even the best and deepest friendships, are always changing. Suppose you had a proposition for your best friend. Even this may take some time to think about how to present it to them so they’d go for it.

If you know any guy who’s been married, happily, for a long while, you know even then getting up the courage to present a situation to his wife can be anxiety ridden, and far from easy.

So, why do so many people treat meeting women like it’s something that can be learned from reading an eBook or attending some guru’s latest boot camp?

Because deep down most guys are terrified. They hope that maybe, just maybe, this guru has discovered some ancient secrets of Atlantis or has channeled some new technology from another dimension. 

But in reality, the best thing would be to simply accept that interacting with women is ALWAYS going to be one of the biggest and greatest mysteries on planet Earth.

(Don’t worry, women feel the same frustrations about men, despite what they say.)

Now, you could throw in the towel. Take your ball and go home. Convince yourself there’s some conspiracy against lazy men who are afraid to get their hands dirty.

But where’s the fun in that?

Dealing with women, interacting with them, talking to them, dating them (etc!) is one of the best parts of life.

It’s never going to be straightforward. It’s never going to seem easy.  It’s never going to feel like you’ve “got it handled.”

But so what? Get in the game. Fall on your face. Get back up and try again. 

Stop making excuses.

Get in there and get some!

How To Engineer Their Thoughts

How To Engineer Their Thoughts

Mental Magic

One of the holy grails for therapy a “content-less” structure.

Now, usually when somebody thinks of therapy, they think of going to some stuffy dude or woman behind a desk who keeps asking questions like, “What do you think that means? How do you feel about that?”

One of the breakthroughs of NLP and covert hypnosis is that it cured people of their problems pretty quickly, usually within a couple of sessions.

Now, you may wonder why more “therapists” aren’t using these tools.

It COULD be (just a guess) that some folks would rather see a customer come in week after week for MONTHS (especially if the insurance is paying for it) instead of once or twice.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure they are plenty of good therapists out there who really intend to do right by their patients.

But for some of these once or twice guys, a dream session is one that is totally devoid of content.

For example, let’s say a client has some sexually related or intimacy related problems. They aren’t likely to open up too much for the first time with a new counselor.

Which is why some really cutting edge counselors are always looking for the totally “content-less” sessions.

Where the client never needs to say anything OTHER than “this problem,” whatever the problem is.

Then speaking in ONLY structure language the counselor can guide to find solutions and resources within themselves, without ever needing labels.

Client comes up, talks to the counselor for an hour or so, client leaves completely satisfied.

And the counselor has ZERO idea what their problem was.

Now, this is an ideal to be strived for.

Everybody’s different, and some people WANT to talk specifics. 

How does it work?

It’s all based on the inherent vagueness of language. For example, if I said, “Dog,” you’d have a certain picture in your head. If I said “dog eating something” you’d have a more detailed picture in your head.

But it would be YOUR picture, based on YOUR experiences. I wouldn’t know WHAT kind of dog, or WHAT they were eating.

This is precisely why the language patterns of conversational hypnosis are so incredibly powerful.

You can lead somebody to YOUR conclusion, based on the pictures in THEIR minds. Which of course, are based on their own experiences, beliefs, likes and dislikes. Not yours.

Which means they’ll have a feeling it was THEIR idea, not yours.

Imagine what you could do with this technology?

As soon as this type of “language technology” was described, immediately salespeople started using to get a LOT more money.

Even if you’re not in sales, or not looking to seduce every good looking person you see, this technology IS a pretty useful one to have.

Check It Out:

Covert Hypnosis

Everybody Else Is Doing It Wrong

How You Can Easily Do It Right

How You Can Do It Right

Here’s the basic structure of any persuasion. But first, understand one thing. Some, all, or none of these parts are unconscious, and conscious. If you’re persuading something in a pure sales or negotiation session, they will  mostly be conscious. Everybody knows what’s going on.

If you’re creating attraction, most will be unconscious. In an attraction setting, most happen on their own, without either person really knowing what’s going on. That’s why the term “falling in love” is the way it is. We “fall” in love, we don’t “go in love” or “enter in love” or “step into love.” The use of the verb “fall” indicates it’s something that happens without us really knowing what’s going on. Like walking down the street, staring at your iPhone, and falling into a ditch. (Nice metaphor, eh?)

Why is that important? Because any time you use any kind of conscious technology to “force” an unconscious process, there’s all kinds of hidden dangers. Be warned.

Any now, here’s the process that underpins every effective persuasion. (At least ones that don’t come out of the barrel of a gun!)

Rapport

The first step is to create rapport. Get the other person feeling comfortable with you. Get them to let their guard down. Get them to open up and trust. Here’s a secret. If you can do this part well, you’re done. The rest will take care of itself.

Elicit Criteria

This is where you find what’s important to them. If their dreams come true, what would they look like. You’ll know you’ve got rapport when you’re asking them what’s important to them, and they simply won’t shut up. Congratulations!

Leverage Criteria

This is where you show them that what you’ve got is a perfect match for what they want. This when all those crazy language patterns come in. When you can use linguistic technology to show them that their criteria (usually pretty vague) can be found in your products, services, or romantic skills (also usually pretty vague). Here’s a big fat warning: If you can promise them you can satisfy them, and you really can’t, they won’t be happy until you’re dead or in jail. Be careful.

Close

This is you get them to sign the contract, give you their phone number, or go home with you. Here’s another secret. The more you do the previous steps, the easier this part is.

In fact, think of these four steps as a pyramid. The first is the very most important. The next is less important, and so on.

If you do the first really, really well, you don’t need the rest. If you do a pretty good job with the first two, you don’t need the rest, etc.

Here’s another secret. The first two are based only on your abilities to talk to others like a natural, self confident, human being. They have nothing to do with sales skills or seduction skills.

Guess which parts those sales and seduction courses focus on? That’s right. The last two. The two the won’t work for squat if you can’t do the first two.

Now you know why most people suck at sales, and suck at seduction.

They’re doing it wrong.

Do it, and you won’t have any problems. With money, or girls.

How To Cast Magic Spells

Real Magic Is Easy

Secrets Of Magic Words

Lately I’ve been watching the TV show “Supernatural” on Netflix.

It’s about a couple of guys who travel around killing monsters, like vampires, werewolves, demons, etc.

In many episodes, they use ancient “spells” to kill the bad guys.

They’ve got some ancient manuscript, usually written in Latin, and when they read the words correctly, the bad guys vanish. Or as they say in the TV show, they “gank” them.

Plenty of other stories have the same idea.

Secret words, said in the right, will do magic.

It’s no coincidence that the name of these magic collection of words are called “Spells” which is the same word to describe the collection of letters that “spell” a word.

After all, a word conjures up an idea in your head. And when I “spell” a word correctly, I get you thinking of a specific image.

Like when you read the words, “Chocolate sauce,” it creates a completely different image in your mind than if I spell out, “angry beehive.”

If I use a bunch of these correctly “spelled” words in the same direction, I can literally lead your mind where I want it to go.

“Chocolate sauce. Cake. Ice cream. Sweet. Cold.”

You get the idea.

Now, most people don’t sit around and contemplate what goes on when we speak. Most people spit out a bunch of words, or listen to a bunch of words, and then just swap ideas (powered by words) back and forth.

But when put our words together as carefully as we put our letters together when we “spell” words, we come with  ”spells” that creates all kinds of magical ideas in the heads of our listeners.

Done with enough patience, you can get people to ditch lifelong problems, buy million dollar products, and even fall in love.

It’s also no coincidence that the very first book on NLP, which described the absolute power of language, was called “The Structure of Magic.”

Now, that book’s pretty dense, and covers some complicated grammar, straight from Chomsky’s brain.

But if you want to learn the most powerful patterns in a hurry, so you can get out there and start using them (to work your own magic), then I’ve got your back.

This course will cover everything you need to get started.

And it’s only nine bucks.

Check it out:

Covert Hypnosis

Do You Really Want To Chase That One Girl?

Is She Really Worth Your Time, Money and Effort?

Is It Really Worth It?

How do you get a girl to like you?

I get that question a lot. Especially by guys who’ve got this one special girl in mind. Sometimes the one that got away. Sometimes one they’ve never really had a conversation with. 

The truth is there IS no fool proof way to make “a girl” like you. Sure, there are ways you can increase the results you get with girls in general. But a particular girl? There’s really not much. This is despite the endless programs being sold about how to “get your ex back.” 

Now, if your life depended on it, (and often times it certainly feels like it does), then there certainly ARE some things you can try. Things that MAY improve your chances with your “ex.” However, there ARE a lot of factors.

How much the relationship is broken. How long you were together. Whether or not that last time was the very “last straw.” And also, crucially missing from many of these programs, the person you’re trying to “get back.”

Do they have a lot of other options? Are they currently dating somebody else? Do they think of you as the biggest mistake of their lives?

Then there’s the ONE question that most people simply don’t want to ask. That questions those economists (the dismal science) tell us we always need to ask.

At what cost?

Now, most guys will say, “At ANY cost!” Which doesn’t really mean much. Are they willing to give up their life’s savings? Are they willing to get fired from their jobs, become homeless for two years? Are they willing to be in the doghouse for the rest of their lives?

Most guys don’t want to think about this. They want a magic fix. They want to read an ebook and say some magic words over the phone that will fix everything.

Here’s the most important thing. When you think about the REAL costs involved, both short term AND long term, of not only “getting your ex back,” but “getting her to like me,” there’s ANOTHER question to ask.

Once you figure out the TRUE COSTS of getting that to happen, ask yourself this:

What ELSE could I get with those SAME costs?

In economics, they call these “opportunity costs.” Meaning those two years you spend making it up to your ex, you could be meeting and dating TEN WOMEN, all who could end up being BETTER than your ex.

Or you could be focused on your job, so that in those same two years you could be making TEN TIMES as much money, which would allow you a lifestyle that will let you meet HUNDREDS of women you’d never otherwise meet.

So if you’re wondering about that “one special girl,” or “getting your ex back,” ask yourself this:

After considering ALL the costs, and the opportunity costs, is it REALLY worth it?

Something to think about.

Easy Ways To Skyrocket Charisma

Focus On Them, Not You

All About Your Focus

Most people think of charisma as some kind of inborn quality, like height or good looks.

If you have it you’re lucky, if you don’t, then you’re not.

Luckily, this is false. But since charisma is widely misunderstood, it’s not clear to a lot of people how to develop it.

Some people say it’s based on body language, some kind of “sexual magnetism,” or maybe some other voodoo.

But the simplest explanation is charisma is the ability to make people feel good when they are around you.

Now, granted, for some people it’s easier than others. If you’re some gorgeous super model, all you’ve got to do is look at people and smile (a REAL smile) and they’ll feel pretty good. They’ll say things like, “Wow, she really lights up a room!”

Unfortunately, most of us aren’t gorgeous super models.

So how do we normal humans create charisma? How do we make people feel good about being around us?

Give them money!

Just kidding.

The easiest is to simply use our language. Instead of talking about ourselves, and how awesome we are (or how awesome we think we are) we get them talking about THEMSELVES and whatever THEY think is awesome about themselves.

Now, if you walk up to some stranger and say, “Wow, You’re AWESOME!” they’ll think you’re some creepy network marketing goof who just escaped from the loony bin.

But when you talk to them like a normal human, but make your intention to carefully and covertly elicit things about them they enjoy, then you’re in pretty good shape.

And when you combine this with a genuine appreciation for whatever it is they are talking about, you will seem VERY charismatic.

One way to significantly fire this up is to use something called “linguistic presuppositions.”

These are pretty cool language structures that assume certain things are true. Salespeople use them to presuppose things about their products or services. Like they’re popular, worth the money, last a long time, better than the competition, etc.

But when YOU use them to presuppose good things about the person you are talking to, you’ll take your charisma to a very rare level of magnetism.

They won’t know exactly what it is about you, but they’ll LOVE being around you.

To learn how, check this out:

Covert Hypnosis