Category Archives: Personal Magnetism

Two Sides Of The Paradox Coin

How To Flip The Paradox Coin

How To Jack The System

There’s a lot of paradoxes in life.

For example, the easiest way to get a loan from the bank is to prove you don’t need the money.

The easiest way to attract a partner is to be completely happy on your own.

One way to lose weight is to increase your metabolism, which you can do by eating more food. Which will make you gain weight. 

Most of us have heard that we make our impressions of people within the first few seconds. After that, it’s hard to overcome that first impression.

On the other hand, most of us only feel comfortable with somebody after we’ve known them for a little bit, and the  more we hang out, the more we let our guard down and let them know who we REALLY are.

Which means almost always, somebody’s first impression (which is hard to change) comes when we are the most reserved and closed off.

There’s a lot of strategies to overcome this paradox. One is where you go out in public and do crazy things, like buy one grape at the supermarket, go into a burger joint and order a pizza, or walk around town with absolutely ridiculous clothing.

Do this long enough, and you’ll just stop worrying too much about what people think.

Then you can relax and be yourself right away, no matter who you meet.

Of course, not a lot of people are willing to go the supermarket and buy one grape!

Another way around this is to develop a deep appreciation for yourself. Take some time every day really settling into your own brain, accepting yourself just the way you are.

This also takes time and consistent effort. 

Whichever path you choose, consider making it a goal. Once you are able to feel comfortable around anybody, anywhere, any time, you will have an incredibly magnetic energy.

People will feel better just hanging around you.

Another thing you’ve likely heard is that communication is only 7% verbal. Meaning before you even open your mouth, your sending out MASSIVE amounts of information through facial expressions, body language, and your movements.

Which means once you feel comfortable in your own skin, people will feel it from across the room.

People will naturally gravitate toward you and want to talk to you and get to know you.

Just by showing up, you’ll magnetize an entire crowd.

Learn More:

Charisma Generator

The Power Of Slow And Steady Movements

Not So Fast Jack!

Not So Fast!

Stability is an often valuable trait.

A stable job is much better than one that may end any time. A stable relationship is preferred to one where everybody’s cheating on everybody. A stable economy is preferred to one that has booms and busts every few years.

Even if chemistry and physics they talk of stable systems in positive terms.

On the other hand, flexibility is often a desired trait. Being able to roll with the punches, change with the times, or respond quickly to market forces is the sign of a healthy individual.

It’s also good to know when to be stable, and when to be flexible.

Long, long ago, there were a bunch of horse and buggy companies. Then the car was invented. They chose stability, and quickly vanished from existence.

Coke chose flexibility over stability when they conjured up “new coke” and it almost ruined them.

Not so easy to choose which is best, even for some of the biggest and most established companies.

One area when it’s generally better to be stable, rather than flexible, is in your mannerisms and movements.

I once saw a movie about old England, and one of the characters was Walter Raleigh, the guy who discovered tobacco and brought it back to England. He was supposed to be this ultra-bold, ultra-confident explorer upon whom the Queen depended in times of crisis.

Only there was this one scene where he was on this ship, and somebody behind him (A romantic interest) called his name. He whipped his head around so fast, he suddenly looked like a schoolboy responding to the call of his crush.

Suddenly, he no longer seemed like a bold explorer. For me at least, that one quick movement ruined it.

I don’t know if that’s what the director was going for, but I don’t think so, as it seemed wholly incongruent with the rest of the character’s actions.

This is what happens when you are in a social setting, and your eyes are darting around, head turning right and left, like some jackrabbit on crack desperate for attention.

On the other hand, those that are ultra charismatic and confident have a very slow, very steady gaze. Very measured movements. Even there speech is slow and conscious. Not ultra conscious like a politician, but slow enough so they don’t spit out the first thing that pops into their brain.

They use their words and actions like a well honed tool, to get a consciously chosen outcome, which is generally an increase in the happiness of those around them.

They enjoy themselves, they enjoy their environment, and they enjoy whomever they happen to be talking to.

If you’re interested in becoming more charismatic, check this out:

How To Be A Social Magnet

Everything Points To You

Energy and Focus

I’ve had some pretty charismatic friends in my time.

One thing that separates them from “non-charismatic” people is the way they use their language.

Not the words themselves, but how they use them.

Consider somebody who’s shy, reserved, not sure of themselves.

Whenever they speak, they’re worried about getting rejected. Maybe other people pick up on this, and they become “easy targets” for those who are belligerent (which is of course another way to hide fear).

When they speak, they refrain from eye contact, you have to lean in to listen to them, sometimes asking them to repeat themselves.

Certainly, most of us speak like this in certain situations. Talking to super attractive people, our bosses, the cops, etc.

However, those that are naturally charismatic say every single word like it feels good just to say it.

Each and every word that passes their lips gets their full attention. Accompanied with strong, positive eye contact, a rich resonant voice, and open and confident body language.

Of course, you can over do this, and if it’s not “natural” you’ll come across as some kind of comic caricature.

But if it’s honest, people will LOVE to listen to you speak. They’ll LOVE to be around you.

If you’ve got young children, or you are ever around young children, you’ve seen this. Whenever you are doing something, and really enjoying it, the kids want to copy you. Even if they don’t know what’s going on.

Those that are charismatic speak and act with a natural energy that says, “I love life, I love me, and I love whatever’s happening right here, right now!”

This makes people want to hang around you. Anything you suggest sounds fantastic. Anything you want to do they’ll want to do.

On the other hand, non-charismatic shy types (or otherwise normal types that are in intimidating situations) speak with a “I’m not sure about life, myself, OR this situation.”

This tends to have the opposite effect.

How do you move from the shy side of the spectrum to the charismatic side?

Remember, all that outside stuff, the behavior, the speech, etc, is first on the inside.

From somebody who genuinely BELIEVES everything’s really groovy.

It’s not a matter of doing something, it’s a matter of NOT doing something.

Those fears, worries, anxieties, just let them go.

That natural charismatic person is already there. Inside you.

When you were a kid, just learning to walk, did you hold anything back? Or did you scream with delight every time something cool happened?

That naturally charismatic person is still there. All you’ve got to do is remove all the fake gunk hiding your brilliance.


Here’s How:

Kundalini Generator