Monthly Archives: January 2015

The Subconscious Improvement Trap

How To Improve Yourself

Need A Push?

Many people have found fantastic success with mind programming, specifically subliminal message, or affirmation overload sessions like the one below:

However, these do present a problem. Believe it or not, many people are finding that the results that they are achieving are not quite what they had anticipated. For example, one client, a world class athlete , has reported becoming “lazy” with his training. At least on a conscious level.

This is a common scenario, and with some understandings of the subconscious-conscious mind interface, we can not only understand how this works, but use it to create even more success.

Wishing Vs. Creating – The Cake Example

One important aspect is the idea of “wishing for success” rather than “creating success.” When many people imagine a better life for themselves, they imagine the final product, rather than the path and the product. Meaning they imagine they’ve got the girl, or the money, or the ideal job or house, and it feels wonderful. 

Since they only imagine the end result without visualizing the path that gets them there, this can easily fall into the “wishing” category, and the final result can begin to feel like a “gift.”

To be sure, it feels wonderful to receive an unexpected gift. Everybody loves birthdays for this very reason. Imagine somebody giving you a cake, unexpectedly, vs. taking the time to bake a cake.

The “gift” cake is sudden, unexpected and it comes with the extra energy of somebody else caring about you enough to make or buy you a cake.

The cake may represent much more than a few mouthfuls of sweet deliciousness!

Now consider baking a cake. You plan the time, organize the ingredients, and bake a cake. The end result is the same. Before you didn’t have a cake, and now you do have a cake.

So why doesn’t baking a cake (and eating it) yourself feel the same as getting it as an unexpected gift?

For one, you are expecting the cake. You have plan to think about it, visualize it, see it to completion. There is no doubt in your mind that you are getting some cake. So when it shows up, there’s nothing surprising about it. You bite into it and it tastes EXACTLY like you’d expected.

This is one reason why creating something consciously can sometimes give us with that “let down” feeling.

But consider this. Consider creating a million dollars. To be sure, it would feel pretty frikking fantastic if somebody showed up to your house with an unexpected sack of money. But how likely is this to happen?

On the other hand, with a solid goal of creating a million dollars, it may take some time, but having a million dollars means having a million dollars.

That is the main advantage of creating vs. wishing. There really is no limit.

The Unconscious Success Scenario

Milton Erickson, the inventor of covert hypnotherapy, noticed something strange about his patients. Often times he would cure there problems, but they wouldn’t notice.

They would come in with a huge phobia of driving over a bridge, for example. He would tell them some crazy, seemingly nonsensical stories, and then they would leave.

Only they would be driving over bridges all day long and not notice anything. Then maybe a week or two later (sometimes even a year!) they would realize that fear of bridges vanished.


This why a few people don’t seem to get results with these programs. They affect deep change on a subconscious level, which alters behavior without the person noticing.

For example, many guys are terrified of starting conversations with cute girls. They listen to a few of the “seduction” sessions, and then suddenly notice they are getting all kinds of positive effects with girls.

What’s going on? Is it magic?

Nope. What’s happening is that their beliefs are slightly changing, altering their behavior, which is getting them the additional response from females. Perhaps their “new” behavior which still “feels” normal is a much more relaxed or happy facial expression. Perhaps longer or more friendly eye contact. Perhaps even slight smiles at girls as they pass by.

All of this is unconscious, and all of this elicits a completely different response from the world around them.

However, it isn’t always as easy to see the results. For example, a martial artist may be making fantastic improvements, but not really noticing anything.

Firstly, how do we know we are being successful, and secondly, how can we get that awesome feeling when we DO achieve our goals?

Objective Measurements

There’re a couple ways to help. Firstly, whenever doing any kind of deep change work, it’s crucial to have a specific intention. Something you are intending to create. 

Secondly, it’s very helpful to have a specific method of measuring your progress. This when being able to associate and dissociate is extremely useful.

Normally, it’s good to be associated. Within your own body, and looking about subjectively to the world, through your own eyes, and with your own feelings.

But sometimes it’s useful to step outside yourself and measure your progress. 

How can you do this?

One way is to become your own “coach” with whatever you are doing. You’ll need to set aside some time everyday for “coaching.”

Meaning you kind of step outside yourself objectively, look at your progress, and give yourself some pointers on how to continue to improve. Look at all the things you are doing, your behaviors, and most importantly any feedback you are receiving. Things people say to you, things you see yourself doing differently.

Then, come up with some specific milestones to shoot for that are above and beyond what you’ve been doing so far.

Once you are comfortable stepping into your own “coaching shoes” you can really begin to “push yourself.”

At the end of every day, from the “coaching perspective” simply write down all the things you’ve done that day that has moved you closer to your goal. Then write down a list of things “to do” the next day that will move you even closer.

You’ll have your own personal coach who will push you, support you, and know you better than anybody else.

Because it IS you!

You’ll know when you’ve arrived at this “dual mind, conscious-unconscious collaboration” when you feel like you are being “watched” by some ever present “boss.”

Meaning you feel as though you’ve been given a “to do” list from a real person. Of course, this sounds like it borders on the schizophrenic, but so what?

The purpose so to create as much as you can with your life.

And this is a great method for coach-you to keep creator-you on track.

So BOTH of you can create whatever you’d like.

Mythical Traits Of Women

Got Girl Problems? Look Right Here!

She’s Right In Front Of You!

Many guys see women as objects, rather than people.

This is pretty obvious. But it manifests itself in a way that is very damaging to the men, rather than the women.

Men tend to assume them women fall into different “categories.” To an extent this is true. Of women as well as men. Physical appearances, religious beliefs, cooking skills, family background, etc.

One thing that all men claim to be “looking for” is a “high quality women.”

The act as if her overall “quality” is something like her height or her political affiliation.

If only it were that simple!

(You want republicans, go to a republican fund raiser!)

But you ask guys what they mean by “quality woman” they’ll usually say things like loyalty, integrity, won’t cheat on you, etc.

Now, this may not be something you enjoy reading about, but consider this “model” of the female population available to you.

ALL WOMEN can potentially become high quality women.


If a woman feels DEEP ATTRACTION to you, she’ll be loyal. She won’t cheat on you. She’ll eagerly follow you if you get transferred across the country.

The problem is most guys couldn’t create attraction to save their lives. They go out, talk to a few girls, get laid, and suddenly think they’ve got mad seduction skills.

But consider this. There’s a whole RANGE of attraction that you can create. And the simple truth about society today is that many girls and guys will jump into the sack without needing much convincing.

Absolutely nothing wrong with.

But what is troublesome is when a guy assumes that because a girl slept with him, it means she’s attracted to him as much as she can be.

But consider this.

On the scale of female attraction, getting her to sleep with you is maybe a 4 or 5 out of ten.

But getting her to feel ENOUGH attraction to behave like a “quality woman” she’s going to need to feel attraction at least 8 or higher, out of ten.

And sadly, most guys just aren’t capable of creating that kind of attraction in the girls they are interested in.

So what you have is all these girls interacting with all these guys. Sure, everybody’s banging each other, but nobody’s feeling levels of attraction more than luke-warm.

This leaves guys thinking there are no quality women, and this leaves girls thinking that this level of attraction is all they’re going to get.

Which makes them start coming up with these ridiculous lists you hear guys complaining about.

Certain income, certain height, job prospects, car, home, etc.

That’s natural.

Think of it this way. Imagine going out and picking up girls. Imagine ALL the girls you found were only 4’s and 5’s according to your scale.

How would you respond?

You’d probably start demanding that they have a LOT more going for them than their looks.

So if you want a quality woman, you’re going to have to take a good, long look in the mirror.

Accept responsibility, and start to work on your skills.

How To Give Your Life Purpose

Change Your Filters For An Amazing Life

Choose Your Mission

When I was a lot younger, I used to go on “seek and destroy” missions at my local mall during Christmastime.

This was how I did my Christmas shopping. I imagined all the people I was buying for, and then tried to buy everything, in one fell swoop, in under an hour.

I know, sounds crazy.  And some of the gifts I ended up getting for people were pretty crazy.

But it was a lot of fun.

I was like the Terminator, walking quickly, my head always turning side to side scanning all the shops.

The only thing on my mind was the list of people I was buying for.

Often I would see something “cool” and then buy it, not yet knowing who I would give it to.

But they always enjoyed them. Always surprised. Always different.

On the other hand, when I’d go to the mall to watch a movie, I’d get there an hour or so earlier just to kill time.

Wander around, check people out, bring a book. Find someplace to kick back and read it for a while.

And even though I was in the same place during both situations, it seemed completely different.

One was killing time. When I was finished, I was just as bored as when I’d started. Sure, movies are fun to watch, and people are fun to watch, but afterwards, I’d always had a feeling of “OK, now what?”

But when I went seek-and-destroy shopping, I had a completely different feeling when I’d finished.

I’d be walking back to my car, lugging all kinds of bags feeling like I’d just conquered the world.

That feeling would even linger over the next few days. Anytime I’d see anything related to Christmas, I’d remember that feeling of accomplishment.

On the other hand, if I went to see a so-so movie, and then later in the week somebody would ask me what I did the previous weekend, it would take a while to conjure up the memory.

Most people spend their entire lives like this. No plans, no dreams, no goals. Just drifting from place to place, job to job, relationship to relationship.

Hoping to get something good and at the same time, hoping to stay out of trouble.

But when you’ve got some solid dreams, goals and visions, the world looks completely different.

Especially if you’ve got an internal set of filters helping you sort through all the stuff out there to help you find what you want.

All it takes is a decision.

A decision to take ownership of your life. To take responsibility for choosing what you want, and the courage to go after it.

What do you want?

Are you willing to get it?

This will help:

Belief Change

What Does Newton Know About Seduction?

If You Want Affection And Loyalty You've Got To Create Attraction

The Physics Of Attraction

Many guys approach girls and creating relationships with girls with a childhood mindset.

When we’re kids, everything we want is given to us by adults. We cry out, and they give us what we want. Usually to shut us up.

If you think about this model of the world, a lot of “adult” behavior makes a lot of sense. People want stuff “just because.” We’ve been conned into thinking that we can get something simply because it’s our “right” or we “deserve it.”

But here’s the shocker.

If whatever you want has to come from somebody else (girl related or not) they aren’t going to give you squat unless you’ve got something they want.

Even when politicians promise us the moon, they’re still using this model. They promise a bunch of stuff IN EXCHANGE for our votes.

But with so many leaders (political, religious, corporate, etc) promising us stuff, it’s easy to stay stuck in the childhood model. Where we think we just need to “express ourselves” and we’ll get some kind of “reward.”

What’s worse, is many guys fall into the “any-work-equals-reward” mindset. This is just as deadly.

For example, they tell themselves they’ve gone through college, have gotten their degree, have a decent job, and decent financial situation, so they “deserve” some kind of beautiful and loyal wife.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t work like that.

No girl is going be interested in you simply because of all the “work” you’ve done on yourself.

The ONLY REASON a girl is going to become interested in you is if you get her feeling those feelings that we collectively refer to as “attraction.”

Only be creating and maintaining attraction will she give you the affection and companionship you’d like.

Even then it’s ALWAYS conditional. As soon as the attractions’s gone, so is she.

Not only do you have to BUILD IT, but you’ve got to MAINTAIN IT.

Now, many guys will scream and cry that this isn’t fair. That “back in the good old days” all you had to do was get a job and sexy loyal girls would fall from the heavens directly into your arms.

But it was really not like that.

Think of this in terms of Newton’s Second Law of Motion:

“For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.”

To put it in terms of dating, it might go like this:

“For every loyal and attractive girlfriend, there’s an equal and opposite attraction-creating boyfriend.”

It’s actually pretty simple.

You want a high quality woman? An attractive lady that will be affectionate and loyal?

Create attraction, and maintain attraction.

Learn How:

Have You Started Phase II Yet?

Ready To Cross Over?

Which Side Are You On?

One of my favorite lines from the movies is from the old Clint Eastwood movie, “The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly.”

Where they are about to find the gold, and one guy says:

“There’s two kinds of people in this world. Those with loaded guns, and those who dig. You dig.”

This easily lends itself to the organization of society since the dawn of time. There are people who hold power, and people who do all the work.

And usually power comes from whoever has all the best weapons. Guns, bombs, planes, swords, the biggest clubs, rocks, alien technology, whatever.

Might, as they say, makes right.

But it also illustrates the human tendency to categorize things. Usually into two or three different groups.

All kinds of studies have shown that our brains pretty much seize up when we’ve got too many choices.

When we’ve got two or three, it’s pretty easy. But when we’ve got five or six, we tend to stand there in confusion.

“Wow! Look at all the stuff!”

(BTW this really sucks when you’re in line behind somebody like this at a fast food joint!)

Most people, as they get older, tend to categorize their lives into “before” and “after”.

Before a certain event, and after that certain event.

Maybe a horrible divorce, maybe when they found out Santa Claus wasn’t real, maybe when they had kids.

In ancient societies, the most crucial barrier to cross was that of childhood, to that of adulthood.

Back then, there were no safety nets. No hospitals, no police. Nobody to call if you got into any trouble.

If you weren’t entirely self sufficient as an adult, you were a huge liability to the tribe.

So they made sure kids turned into adults.  They put them through extended ceremonies, days at a time, where they would have to dig deep and face a horrible life or death situation.

Of course, it was all staged, but the kids didn’t know that.

By facing death, they went in as kids, and came out as adults.

Unfortunately, there is nothing remotely close to this today. It’s very easy to stay in the “childhood mindset” your entire “adult” life.

It’s incredibly hard to make this transition completely on your own. Back then it was a tribal event. The whole tribe participated to make sure the kids made the transition.

Today, it’s all up to you.

You may say the whole purpose of life is to become an adult. To become actualized may mean to become fully responsible, fully capable, and fully in control of who you are, what you get, and where you go.

One step in the that direction is taking charge of your mind. Instead of accepting beliefs from others, you can learn to choose them yourself.

See the world how YOU want, not how THEY want you to.

Learn how:

Belief Change

Mind Control For Approach Anxiety

Think Your Way Around Approach Anxiety

Ditch Your Inner Caveman

Most guys feel a certain amount of approach anxiety when even THINKING about going over and talking to a girl. 

You could be sitting there with your buddies, and they point out a group of girls that YOU should go and talk to. Just thinking about it may send you into an anxiety brain freeze.

This is perfectly natural.

The trick is to train your brain so you don’t automatically respond in your naturally programmed way.

Humans are hard wired with all kinds of automatic responses. These were helpful in our ancient days as hunters and gatherers, but they aren’t so useful any more.

For example, if you stuff your pie hole every time you had an opportunity, you’d be pretty obese. If caveman DIDN’T do this, they’d die of starvation.

Approach anxiety is another leftover instinct from our caveman days. Back in those days, there were only a couple hundred people TOTAL in our tribe. We spent our entire lives with these people.

Which meant that there were MAYBE ten or twenty girls to choose from, and ten or twenty guys who were going after those ten or twenty girls. Everybody else was either too old, too young, or already hitched.

So in those days, it was absolutely CRUCIAL that you approach correctly, or you were in deep trouble.

These days, not so much. In fact, you could walk up to ten cuties TODAY, fail miserably, and NOBODY would know.

If you tried that the caveman days you’d be one lonely dude.

So the first trick is to simply accept that EVERYBODY is hard wired to feel approach anxiety. There’s NOTHING wrong with you. It’s COMPLETELY normal.

So, how do you fix it?

Think of it like you’d think of planning  a diet. If you wanted to get a six pack, you’d decide ahead of time which kinds of food you’d eat, right? And when you’d eat, right?

So if you were walking down the street and you passed a burger joint, you’d tell yourself, with your conscious mind, “Hmm. That smells good, but it’s not on my diet plan, so I can’t eat it.”

You would overcome your irrational instincts with rational planning. To the extent you could stick to your plan, you’d get your six pack.

You can approach girls the same way.

Plan ahead of time which girls you’d like to date, just like you plan your six pack meal plan.

Figure out what kind of personalities they need to have. What kind of education, religion, politics, etc.

So when you do this, you’ll see girls and NOT KNOW if she qualifies or not.

So when you think about approaching her, you’ll be curious rather than anxious.

The first couple of times may be difficult.

But the more you do this, the more you’ll realize that not a lot of girls meet your criteria. Once you get that deep feeling from experience that “good looks aren’t enough” you’ll be home free.

Free Downloads:

How To Change Limiting Filters

Change Your Filters

Scientific Mind Control

I’ve always loved science, ever since I was a kid.

I used to beg my mom to buy me these “kits” from Radio Shack where you could wire a whole bunch of simple circuits together.

Once I ran my regular room light through the circuit to turn my room into a strobe light discotheque.

Of course, my dad thought I was going to burn the house down.

They say that science can seem like magic if it’s sufficiently advanced. But to a kid it’s just a cool trick.

Like pouring vinegar into baking soda, and watching it foam up all over the place. Nowadays you can do that with Mentos and Diet Coke.

When I was in college me and some buddies would find some pool acid (from the dormitory pool supply room) and mix it with some aluminum foil in a big 2 liter plastic bottle.

The aluminum foil would mix with the acid, cause heat and gas, melting the plastic and expanding the bottle until BOOM!

Since we were young and dumb, we didn’t realize how dangerous that was.

One of the coolest discoveries I made (or rather was taught) was about polarized lenses.

When light comes from the sun, it’s bouncing in all different directions. The part of the light that is parallel to the ground, or any level surface can bounce off, and cause glare.

So polarized sunglasses take out the horizontal element of light, so you don’t get any glare.

The cool part is when you take to lenses that are polarized, and rotate them against one another.

Once you’ve got them at 90 degree angles, they’ll cut off ALL light.

You can see it getting darker and darker as you rotate them.

By simply changing some simple filters, you can’t see all the stuff that light allows us to see.

Of course, our brains come the same way.

Now, sun glasses are specifically made that way for a specific purpose.

But the filters in our brains, that keep us from seeing what’s right in front of us, were likely put there, but others, or ourselves, without us really knowing what was going on.

Most of us pick up quite a few filters by the time we’re seven or eight years old, and unless you consciously change them, you’re pretty much stuck with them.

Of course, if your filters are helpful, and help you to see things that enrich and empower you, that’s great.

On the other hand, if your filters are keeping you from seeing the truth about yourself and your rightful place in the world, unless you take the time to change them, things will stay the same.

Luckily, changing them is pretty easy. First you’ve got to find them, them simply replace them with more helpful ones.

If you’re interested in learning how, check this out:

Belief Change

The Secret Of Getting Girls To Fall In Love With You

How To Create Love

Is Love Possible To Engineer?

A long, long time, conversational hypnosis was invented. Some guy (a genius really) in a wheelchair needed to come up with a more effective way of hypnotizing people.

Even even though they were coming to see a hypnotist, to be hypnotized, they still were afraid. So they still had their mental shields.

Enter the Milton Model.

This is when Milton Erickson invented a new form of hypnosis that wasn’t really dependent on the client voluntarily going into hypnosis.

He would talk to them a little “strange.” Not so strange they thought they were being hypnotized. But strange enough so they still paid attention, even though most of the time they didn’t know what the heck he was talking about.

Then they would leave his office, confused, thinking maybe they’d wasted their money. Only their problems were GONE.


Then some guys figured out how he “talked” and taught it to others. They figured it would be great for therapy. Of course, it didn’t take long after that for people to use it in sales, (to make a lot of money) and seduction (to have a lot of sex).

However, something happened along the way, and a lot of men today are very angry. They feel cheated. They feel as if they’ve discovered the “truth” about women, and they don’t like it.

And if you keep reading, you may not like what you’re about to hear either.

Sure, these patterns work great on firing up emotions. They work great in sales, because they get to the heart of the deep feelings the customer is trying to satisfy. Which means they can help salespeople create some very valuable and profitable relationships with their customers.

But picking up girls is VASTLY different than selling things to customers.

A customer walks into your shop, and they want something. They know they want something. You know they know they want something. They know you know they know they want something. (Ok, enough already!)

So you create rapport, and talk about what they want. They share why they want what they want. You build up their feelings, and attach those feelings to your product. They buy it, and go home. They are happy. You are happy.

Next time they want to buy something, they think of you. Because you made them feel happy about buying something.

Girls are different.

Girls don’t go shopping for a boyfriend or a husband. Girls like romance. (Many guys do also, but we’re terrified to admit it.)

They want it to “just happen.”

Now, with these language patterns, you can make it “just happen.”

At least in the short term.

But think of one very important thing. A girl deciding to have sex is NOT the same thing as a girl falling in love with you and wanting you to be her boyfriend.

Those feelings take a long time. She needs to see you several times. Those thoughts need to bubble up in her mind on their own. 

Mother Nature made damn sure most girls don’t fall head-over-heels in love with guys at the drop of a hat.

They are VERY HARD to create. They are much different than those “let’s have sex” feelings.

Many guys don’t get this. They think if they talk to her, build up her emotions enough to get her in between the sheets, that’s good enough.

It’s sometimes is, but usually not.

Deep feelings of love take a lot longer to create. Because they must be real, not fake.

Which means YOU must be real, and not fake. Which means you must RISK getting rejected.

Not from approaching her, but from dating her a couple months and then getting dumped.

If you want to get laid, you’re going to have to overcome approach anxiety. Once you do, talk to enough girls, and you’ll get laid.

But if you want to create a real relationships, you’re going to have to do a lot more.

It’s certainly not easy, and it’s not quick. 

But it certainly is worth it.

Essential Mind Tools:

How To Define Your Life

Choose Your Destiny Of Your Life

Become Master Of Your Destiny

What is the secret of life?

That all depends.

In order to understand the secret of anything, we’ve got to first understand what that “thing” is, and what it means.

For example, what’s the secret of cake?

It all depends on what you’re doing with the cake. Are you making it? Eating it? Baking it? Decorating it? Smashing it into somebody’s face?

All actions regarding cake would have different secrets. If you’re eating it, the secret might be to use a spoon, and not let it touch the ice cream.

But different cake eaters would have different secrets. Some folks might like to mix it with the ice cream in a bowl, and eat it with their fingers.

Obviously, since we can’t really come to a widespread agreement of the secret of eating cake, how the heck are we supposed to uncover the secret of life?

While there’s certainly no secret that will apply to everybody, there IS a secret that will apply to you.

Again, this requires that you come up with what “life” means to you.

What do you want out of it?

How will you know when you get it?

What are the constraints? (e.g. “I want to make a lot of money without cheating or stealing or deceiving anybody”).

The better you define “your life” the more likely you’ll find the secret to making it happen.

Unfortunately, most people don’t even know they have this power.

They are content to let others do their thinking for them. To tell them what’s important, and what’s not. To tell them when they’re doing a good job, and when they aren’t. To tell them when they’re successful, and when they aren’t.

How about you?

Are you content to take what you’ve been given? Or do you want something more?

Do you want to not only define life on your terms, but also define when you’re successful?

Are you willing to take ownership of your life, and everything in it?

Most people are too terrified to even contemplate this.

The truth is that the world will respond to your own definition of our own life.

If you are content to let others handle it for you, the world will comply.

If you demand you create your own life, on your terms, the world will comply.

This is the one secret most people will never know.

It all starts with your inner mind.

How you see yourself, how you see the world, and how you define your place in it.

This will help:

Belief Change

How To Find High Quality Women

Searching For High Quality Women?

Criteria Are Essential

It’s easy to feel angry and frustrated if you aren’t having much success with the ladies.

Even if you are “hooking up” from time to time, it can be frustrating if they turn out to be “low quality” women.

The thing about sex is it’s not nearly as meaningless as many people like to believe. Humans have been around for a long, long time, and we wouldn’t have been as successful, compared to other animals, if we didn’t have a lot of advantages.

One of those advantages is that humans are one of the few animals that form long term pair-bonds.

To make it even more powerful, humans are the ONLY animal that employ sexually specific labor.

Meaning that back in the caveman days, both men and women looked for food. But men looked for different food (meat or protein) than women (roots, nuts, berries, etc). 

Basically men hunted, while women gathered.

This became a HUGE advantage because humans could live in a LOT more environments than all other animals.

If the men OR the women came up empty, we were still OK for a while.

So it became even MORE IMPORTANT to our deep programming to look for relationships, rather than anonymous sex, like many other primates.

One way this plays out is guys think they are looking for a one-nighter, only to find they’re having feelings for the girl after a couple rolls in the hay.

Since women are MUCH BETTER at compartmentalizing this kind of thing, if they’re going into it with ONLY a one-night-stand mindset, they’re much more likely to hold that one-night-stand mindset.

The end result is a guy who thinks he’s looking for a one-nighter ends up having feelings, when she doesn’t.

This leads to many guys thinking that all women are sluts, or low quality, or feeling “cheated” or lied to.

Now, I’m not saying that sex within hours of meeting is wrong or immoral, but it CAN make it complicated to build a solid relationship, if that’s what you’re after.

Another reason for a lot of confusion is many guys don’t have much criteria. Meaning they aren’t sure what kind of girl they’re looking for, other than a girl that likes them.

Then when they have sex, they assume all THEIR criteria is fulfilled, but the girl might think otherwise.

She might ONLY see you as some “guy she hooked up with” rather than boyfriend material.

One way to avoid this is to have some solid criteria BESIDES her physical appearance.

Then take some time to sort for this FIRST, before sleeping with her.

I know this is against what most gurus preach, which is to bang her as soon as possible, but if you consider a long term strategy of building a healthy relationship, rather than a string of heartbreaks, it may be something to consider.

Build Your Inner Game: