Way back when I was in school, I studied physics.
And most of the classes, even the upper division advanced stuff, was dumbed down.
Meaning they would only talk about simple systems.
More than a few variables, and the math gets way too complicated.
Even today, when they have MASSIVE computing power, they still can’t predict the weather with much accuracy.
Sure, it’s going to rain. It’s going to be sunny. There’s a huge storm coming.
But beyond those general statements (which most sailors from hundreds of years ago could tell you) they can’t get much more specific.
And that’s only a FEW variables. Heat, humidity, wind speed, precipitation.
Now consider somebody who wants to know a few “lines” to memorize to say to other people in order to get some kind of result.
A date, a sale, a phone number.
Just two people who’ve known each other for YEARS have WAY MORE variables than any INORGANIC weather system.
Think about that.
That’s why it makes little sense to memorize any kind of language pattern to use with another human.
And why it’s much more important to learn basic TECHNIQUES.
Kind of like boxing. Not the greatest metaphor, since communication isn’t a fight, it’s a search for mutual understanding and mutual benefit. But it helps to understand.
You NEVER KNOW which particular punches you’ll throw in which particular order.
So you do a couple of very important things.
One is you practice ALL KIND OF MOVES. Jabs, roundhouses, uppercuts, etc.
AND you practice READING YOUR OPPONENT. So you know when and what kind of punch to throw.
When it comes to communicating, it’s pretty similar.
But most people completely IGNORE the idea of the OTHER PERSON.
But when you simply pay attention to the other person, and understand what they want, presenting YOUR IDEAS in those terms (what they want) is much more effective.
In fact, it’s SO EFFECTIVE, that if you spend most of your time getting to know them, what they’re interested, etc., everything else will simply fall into place.
Of course, this isn’t as easy as baking a cake. Everybody’s different. Everybody responds differently. And between YOUR IDEAS and THEIR IDEAS there’s a lot of junk.
Specifically, everything that makes up YOUR inner game, and everything that makes up THEIR inner game.
Simply understanding these exist will put you miles ahead of everybody else.
Making it much easier to create WONDERFUL interactions with pretty much anybody.