When I was younger, I used to do a lot of backpacking.
It kind of forced you to be very careful when choosing what to bring.
Some things were AWESOME to have with you, but they were heavy.
So you had to spend a lot of time choosing.
Since you’re carrying all your stuff on your back for a week or so, you want to make sure it’s not weighing you down.
Once I had to take my then girlfriend to the airport. I showed up at her house and she had three HUGE bags.
Clearly, everything has its advantages and disadvantages.
This goes with pretty much everything.
Even the basics of human biology has costs. Sure, it’s great to get energy from food. But finding it can suck, especially if you’re a caveman. And you’re being chased by a tiger and you have to stop use the caveman toilet, it’s not so convenient.
In economics they have something called an “opportunity cost.” Which means whenever you decide to do something, you’re subconsciously choosing to NOT do a bunch of other things.
You can go out and hang with your friends, but you might miss out on some amazing TV shows!
You could agree to an exclusive relationship with that girl or guy you’ve been seeing, but that means that EVERYBODY else on earth is off limits.
You could buy that cheeseburger for $2, but that means you’re also deciding that everything else on earth that’s also $2 is not what you want.
Of course, when you’re eating that delicious cheeseburger, you’re not focusing on what you DON’T have, you’re focusing on what you DO have.
If our brains weren’t pretty good at this, we’d NEVER be able to decide anything.
Then again, a lot of times we over think things. Instead of focusing on a positive outcome, or even a likely outcome, we allow our caveman brains to come up with the WORST outcome, and then use THAT, however UNLIKELY it is, to define our actions.
That’s the problem with having such quick thinking brains. Sure, they help us decide lickity-split, but we can also send ourselves on horrible mental loops.
Being able to manage your own brain, and manage the thoughts you think and HOLD is a POWERFUL skill to have.
For example, what if you were to imagine the BEST POSSIBLE outcome when you were considering doing ANYTHING, and you had the skill to ONLY think about THAT? Would that make taking action a lot easier?
Of course it would!
This is the power of holding a frame. Of not being knocked off balance by reality, other people, or even your inner caveman (or cavewoman).
It IS a skill, which means you MUST practice.
But when you do, you’ll be pretty pleased with yourself.