Category Archives: Game

The Most Crucial Goal Of Life

It's All Up To You

It’s All On You

Many guys make an absolutely crucial error when meeting girls. Simply stated, they blame the market, rather than themselves.

Now, that may seem harsh, but if you can’t get what you want, there’s only one thing you can do. And that is to improve yourself until you CAN get what you want.

Imagine going to the store to buy something to eat. But all you’ve got is a dollar. You could complain that the market is rigged, that food is too expensive, or that the food producers are ripping everybody off and there’s some kind of food scam conspiracy going on.

Or you could simply find a way to get more money, so you have more choice. 

One of the most common things people tend to do is NOT take responsibility. Politicians have known this for thousands of years. So long as they promise the common man their problems are NOT their fault, they keep getting elected.

Unfortunately, it is a false promise.

While it’s not technically your “fault,” it is most certainly your responsibility. Most of the time it’s not ANYBODY’S “fault.”

But something about the human brain keeps us from seeing things this way. We seem to be hard wired to ALWAYS need some kind of “bad guy” to point our fingers at.

So, how do you respond when you approach ten girls and they all shut you down?

Do something different.


You can’t call the pickup police and force them to accept your advances. You COULD get angry or hurt, take your ball and go home, and never go out again, but there’s no fun in that.

What exactly should you do differently?

This is where your own personal responsibility comes into play. This is only up to YOU to decide. You can’t learn what to do specifically on the Internet. You can’t copy something from a movie.

You can only try different things, and keep trying different things, until you find something that works. Then keep doing variations of THAT (whatever it is) until it works better and better.

Is this fair? Absolutely not. Some guys are naturals, some guys aren’t. Nothing you can do about that.

Is this easy? No way! Getting rejected by a cute girl hurts worse than pretty much anything else.

Will this be a quick process? Not likely. You’ll have to sort through a lot of girls that won’t want to have anything to do with you, until you find one that does.

But guess what?

If you really want a high quality woman to share your life with, this is the ONLY way.

However, here’s some good news. If you make it a point to spend the next year or two (yes, YEAR or two) refining this process, increasing your skills, until you DO meet her, you will be able to do ANYTHING.

Get Started:

Girlfriend Generator

How To Engineer The Ideal Relationship

Eyes Wide Open

Eyes Wide Open

Why do relationships tend to go south? Sure, most of us want an ideal relationship with the ideal person. And many people DO feel they’ve got something, in the beginning.

But then after the thrill is gone, and reality rears it’s ugly head, it’s pretty much over. Why does this happen, and more importantly, how can you keep it from happening?

Everybody loves free stuff, especially when it’s unexpected. Even more especially when it’s sexually and emotionally charged.

This is why those early days feels so good. You’re pushing her buttons, which is making her push your buttons, which makes you push her buttons, and on and on.

Since this happens unconsciously and automatically, it feels like you’ve finally discovered the alchemy of love.

Unfortunately, this “magic” is short lived. Because a large part of the feel-good-button-pushing is based on a feeling of “newness.” Once you start to expect the button-pushing, it starts to lose it’s self-generative effect.

Pretty soon you expect her to push your buttons, and she expects you to push hers. But since you’re both expecting the other person to “go first,” nobody does, and you start to wish things were the way they were before.

The way to keep this from happening is to plan for it to happen, and pre-frame against it.

How do you do that?

Establish what those buttons are, and have a deep, open, non-emotional conversation. Go into a relationship like you would a business partnership, at least in part.

Make a pact to not only understand what each buttons are, but to continue pushing them after the thrill is gone.

That way, you can recreate that thrill-feeling at will.

For example, imagine how cool it feels to get an unexpected massage from your girlfriend. But if you start expecting them, she’ll stop giving them.

But if you have a discussion about what you like, and what she likes, and some kind of consciously chosen exchange, she’ll keep giving you what you want, so long as you keep giving her what she wants.

Since you’re the man, you’ve got to go first. You’ve got to generate this “exchange.” You’ve got to lead her into this discussion.

There is one crucial thing that HAS TO happen in order for this to work.

You’ve got to go in, eyes open, and create this from the very beginning. Which means you’ve got to actually like her as a person, BEYOND any feelings of sexual or emotional satisfaction.

Which means you’ve got to have some solid, non-physical criteria before you even walk up to her for the first time.

If you don’t have this kind of criteria, get some.

Now, you don’t have to tell her any of this. Give her the gift of it “just happening.” Let her experience that feeling of romance.

Leave it up to you to engineer the perfect relationship with the perfect woman.

She’ll be glad you did.

Get Started:

Girlfriend Generator

The Benefits Of Long Game

Short Term Game Is For Clowns

Stop Hustling For Short Term Action

Some of the most powerful people in the world operate behind the scenes.

They cause events to happen not because the initial outcome is what want. Nor the secondary or tertiary outcome. But because they know they are setting up the conditions for the outcome they REALLY want.

And it’s not some kind of once-off type of deal. It is a situation where they can continue to reap the benefits of their efforts for DECADES.

This is the power of the LONG CON. However, the word “con” is not the best word. The word “con” involves stealing, or law breaking, or some kind of trickery or manipulation.

However, when dealing with women, and personal relationships, the structure is the same. In this respect, the term long “game” is more appropriate, but even then it’s a misnomer. When you think of “gaming” somebody, it conjures up ideas of one person “winning” and the other person “losing.”

It can help to think in terms of sales. For example, think of an insurance salesman. Let’s say he goes door to door, and tries to sell people auto insurance. There’s basically two types of “game” he can employ.

Short game, or long game.

Short game is where he comes up with some super ninja language patterns, or really persuasive charisma that gets him really high closing rates. Like maybe two or three out of ten people. Considering it only takes him a couple three hours or burn through that many potential customers, and that each sales is worth a couple hundred, that’s pretty good money.

However, those customers aren’t likely going to be long term customers. His “short game” doesn’t allow for him to see if they are really a match for his product or not.

Which means most of them cancel after the first year. Which means he ALWAYS has to be out hustling new customers.

As soon as he stops hustling, his income stream wills top not long thereafter.

Now think of a guy who employs ultra “long game” strategy.

Maybe he talks to 100 or even 500 customers before he gets a sale. Maybe he only gets a sale every one or two weeks.

Sounds horrible at first glance.

But these customers are LIFE LONG customers. They renew EVERY SINGLE YEAR. Not only that, but guess who they call when they know somebody who needs insurance? Or when their kid’s old enough to drive? Or when they buy a new car, or even a new house?

That’s right, they call him.

How many of these customers do you think he needs for a really FAT and really PASSIVE INCOME?

Not a lot. Maybe a couple hundred.

Sure, he’s got to hustle a lot, and NOT GET PAID while he’s getting those customers. Most sales people don’t have that kind of long term vision, or patience.

But those that do get paid FOR LIFE.

Long term game, when it comes to women, is the same.

How does it apply?

You can use short term game. Do a lot of hustling to get a lot of low quality (unqualified) women in the sack. But when you stop hustling, so does the love. 

On the other hand, you can employ long game.  Find high quality candidates that don’t need to be gamed. They see the quality of your product (YOU) and are sold on their own.

How do you do that?

Take some time talking to her. Figure out if you REALLY ARE a match. Forget the short term, NON-SUSTAINTABLE relationships that all the other clowns are chasing.

Keep this up and before long, you’ll have a few HIGH QUALITY WOMEN that are totally into you. And they will be the ones trying to close you.

With little effort on your part.

How do you create this wonderful situation?

Here’s How:

Girlfriend Generator

How To Ditch The Agony Of Defeat

How to Create A Positive Feedback Loop

How To Create A Positive Feedback Loop

Whenever you do any kind of planning or manifesting, it’s always recommended to have a positive expectation.

If you think you’ll fail, you will increase your chances of that happening. Say you go in for a job interview, and you don’t think you’ll do well. This will decrease your enthusiasm, which will have a negative effect on how you present yourself.

Of course, this will decrease the chances you get the job, making your negative expectations come true.

On the other hand, if you’ve got positive expectations, and really imagine yourself having the job, then you’ll be much more outgoing, confident and articulate. Things interviewers love to see.

However, this won’t guarantee you get the job. Sure, it will increase your chances. But what if everybody else who’s interviewing is doing the same thing?

This is one of the problems with holding a positive expectation. If it doesn’t happen right away, it’s very easy to get discouraged, angry and resentful.

Expecting to get something, and then not getting it, feels VERY similar to getting cheated.

It’s the same, on an emotional level, as somebody making a promise to you that is based on pure lies.

I’m sure you’ve heard that old saying, “Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.”

Thing about those old sayings is there’s a reason they’ve been around for a while.

How do you implement them? How do you continue to maintain a positive expectation when odds are you’ll run into problems, difficulties and obstacles no matter what?

One is to take on the mindset of responsibility. One of the reasons we feel cheated when things don’t work out, is we still have the mindset of “receiving something” rather than “earning something.”

Often times, we feel like we’re supposed to put in a certain amount of work and then the “universe” is supposed to “give us” a prize for our efforts.

Kind of like being a little kid playing some game at a birthday party.

Think of something that you KNOW is totally under your control. When things don’t go the way you’d hoped, you step back and do something different. This is pretty much the underlying structure of ALL human behavior.

Action, feedback, increased information, more action.

This is true for huge life dreams, like creating a lucrative career. This is true for very small things, like finding our way to the bathroom in the dark in a friends house.

To remove the sting of not getting what you want, think in terms of creating, rather than simply being a passive receiver.

Not only will it make things much easier, but because you’ll have much more control, you’ll be able to create a LOT more.

Learn How:

How To Build Up Massive Attraction

Only One Way To Build Attraction

Experience Is Essential

What do women want? That’s kind of a trick question, since what we want is based on our conscious decision making. Like when the waitress takes your order, or when the barber asks what kind of hair style you’d like.

When it comes to attraction, both male and female, what we want isn’t really so important. It’s what we respond to.

Now for guys, this is pretty hard to understand instinctively. Sure it makes sense on intellectually, but most guys don’t ask as if they truly understand this crucial concept.

Guys respond to girls based on how they look. And when they look at many girls, they tend to respond the same way. Big boobs, slim waist, clear skin, healthy hair, etc. So when somebody asks, what’s our ideal of a perfect woman, we describe the way she looks.

Meaning we describe the girl we respond to most. Because we respond to the same type, over and over, either in real life or through media, it’s easy to consciously describe the type of girl we dream about.

But girls aren’t nearly as interested in looks as guys are. They are much more interested in character. And character takes a lot of time to flesh out. Which means they don’t have NEARLY as much data to go from, when asked to describe what they “want.”

Even movie characters are kind of hit and miss. Male movie characters that truly turn a woman on are NOT the same type of movie characters that sell movie tickets.

At least not in the way we think.

However, if you study the kind of movies and books that women tend to DEVOUR, you’ll see a pattern.

Romance novels, for example, are filled with the same types. And guess what? They are NOT beta providers, or the hippie sensitive type.

Nor are they the politically correct type.

Woman are drawn to guys who can lead. Guys who are confident. Guys who can handle any situation that comes up.

They want to feel protected, on a subconscious level. They want to FEEL IT, rather than hear you say it.

They want to see EVIDENCE that you can do it, not you telling them you can do it.

How do you show them?

One is to be confident, no matter what happens. This is precisely WHY girls test you.

They WANT to make sure you are REALLY confident, and not easy to shakeable.

They figure if you can pass HER TESTS, once she decides she is WITH YOU, you’ll be able to handle any tests the world throws at you.

She’s not going to feel very safe with you when you’re crumbling at the first sign of trouble!

This simply CANNOT be faked, despite how much money people pay for courses that teach otherwise.

The only way to demonstrate your ability to handle anything is to experience as much as you can.

Which means talking to girls rather than looking at them.

If you start doing this, you’ll build up some incredible skills.

Get Started:

Girlfriend Generator

Is Your Game Based On Irrational Thinking?

Stop The Insanity!

Stop The Insanity!

There’s a sane way to meet girls, and an insane way.

According to Einstein, insanity is doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results.

Unfortunately, this is the strategy of most guys. Meaning they meet girls, date them for a couple weeks or months, and then crash and burn.

Sometimes even for a few years until it fizzles out.

Why do relationships fizzle? Why don’t they last with those good feelings you have in the beginning?

One reason is any time you get with somebody, you’re both on your best behavior. Both consciously and unconsciously. Our caveman brains are programmed to think that sexual relationships are few and far between. So when we think we’re getting close, we’re careful not to mess things up.

Then later on, we’re so thrilled to be with somebody (that we hope will be THE ONE) it has that new, fresh, feeling of discovery.

When this happens, there is an unconscious feedback loop. You push her buttons, which makes her feel good so she pushes yours, which makes you feel good so you push hers. And on and on.

In the beginning this feels fantastic, because when she pushes your buttons, it’s unexpected, so it feels like magic.

Then once you get used to each other, that “magical” feeling wears off. It is entirely possible to keep that magical feeling, but you have to push each buttons consciously. You have to push her buttons when you don’t want to, which will create pleasure in her, which will make her WANT to push your buttons.

In the beginning, the pump primes itself, but later on, you’ve got to keep it primed consciously.

This is hard to do when you’re not that compatible. When you are consciously pushing somebody’s buttons, in order to make them feel emotional pleasure, you actually have to LIKE the person beyond sexual intimacy. You have to actually RESPECT and ADMIRE the person beyond sexual and emotional intimacy.

This is not going to happen automatically.

And guess what? For every ten or twenty people you meet, there’s really only one, maybe two that you will genuinely like, admire, and respect. This goes for all people. Male and female.

Unfortunately, it’s hard to see this when meeting girls, because you’re senses are overwhelmed by potential sexual intimacy, which ALWAYS takes precedent, since it’s a survival function.

How do you get around this?

Simply come up with some characteristics of somebody you have a HIGH PROBABILITY of liking, admiring, and respecting BEFORE you go out and meet girls.

Then when you’re talking to her, before you turn on the charm, sort for these characteristics. If she has them, then seduce her till she begs for more.

But if she doesn’t? Don’t waste your time. Because you’ll know how this one ends.

Sure, it will take time to find the RIGHT GIRL for you, but you know it’s worth it.

Get Started:

Girlfriend Generator

Why You Must Be A Leader

Become A Leader To Create Attraction

Essential Skills To Create Attraction

On a deep and fundamental level, it’s easy to see what women want, and what men want.

Look back into our long evolutionary history, and it becomes pretty obvious. Women want a strong, confident, socially comfortable man to lead. Men want a supportive, loyal, feminine woman to stand behind him.

Sure, this sounds very old school, very anti-feminist, very anti-modern and empowered. But consider the vast majority of human history, where our instincts and gender roles were pretty much set.

Men went out every day and hunted. Took risks, found new places to live, and pretty much built all the tools of society. Women stayed behind while the men were hunting, and gathered. They took care of the kids. They got roots, nuts, other food in case the men got skunked.

Scientists tell us that this “sexual diversification of labor” was one of the main drivers of our evolutionary success. In all other mammals, both men and women searched for the same type of food.

Because humans looked for different food between men and women, we could live in twice as many places.

This is also why men are good at some things, while women are good at others. Men have narrow, long range vision, for example. Women have short, very wide vision. One is good for hunting, the other is good for gathering while watching kids at the same time.

Men don’t talk much, women talk all the time. Hunters vs. gatherers.

How does this translate to the modern dating scene?

On a deep level, she wants you to lead the way. She wants to follow you. But if you assume she SHOULD follow you, you’re in for a surprise.

Sadly, many “men” today are simply not worthy of being followed.

Are you?

When you make a decision, do you immediately take action, or do you wait to make sure it’s OK?

If you are on a date, for example, this is the worst thing you can do. Ask your date if your decision is OK.

Now, you don’t want to be rude, but you also don’t want to radiate a sense of weakness, and lean on her to call the shots.

In the very early stages, this means you MUST lead in all aspects. You MUST be the one who approaches. You MUST be the one who carries the conversation. You MUST be the one to set the first get together.

Will she follow? Maybe, maybe not. The ones that don’t follow simply aren’t into you. Let them slide.

But the ones that do follow you are the ones you’re after.

Start leading, and see who follows. That will tell you everything you need to know.

Get Started:

Girlfriend Generator

Who’s The Boss Of You?

Choose Your Own Course

How To Take Control Of Your Life

I love walking in the mornings. 

Especially really early, when it’s still dark. Normally, I follow a pretty standard route. Down to the big park near the main library, and then back home.

But sometimes I take a detour. Sometimes I’ll see something down a side street I feel like checking out.

My only intention for walking is to let my mind wander, and as a side benefit get a little bit of exercise.

I’m not going anywhere in particular, just out and back.

This is a great strategy for a lot of things. When the process is more important than the outcome.

Going on holiday is another example. Sure, the destination is important. But most of the time, the main outcome of a holiday is just to relax and unwind.

Even some things that seem to have a clear outcome are really process focused. People that have certain hobbies for example. Building stuff with wood. Painting, other forms of creative expression.

The intentions is not so much the outcome (unless it’s your career or you want it to be your career someday), but the process. Just losing yourself in the creative process and seeing what happens.

Other things require a much more detailed focus on the outcome.

When you’re boss tells you to have a certain report by a certain date, for example. You wouldn’t write the report the same way you enjoyed one of your hobbies, would you?

Or if your job was a truck driver, for example, and you were carrying perishable materials. You wouldn’t lazily take the scenic route, stopping for photos along the way.

You’d have a specific outcome, to be in a specific place at a specific time. 

Most of the time, it’s easy to tell the difference between process activities, and outcome activities.

One huge indicator is when somebody tells us to do something. Then it’s clear there’s some kind of outcome we’d better achieve.

However, only leaving those “outcome based” activities up to the directions of others is a mistake.

A potentially HUGE one.

See, the biggest process of all is your life.

And your life is filled with outcome after outcome.

Most people are content to let others choose each of these intermediary outcomes, and then just relax on process stuff in the middle.

This is certainly safe. It’s certainly low risk. If you get into trouble, you’ve always got somebody to blame.

But it’s INCREDIBLY limiting.

The truth is that choosing your OWN outcomes is a lot easier than many people realize.

Now, I’m not talking about vague wishes that most people have.

“I want more money. I want to lose weight. I need a partner.”

Everybody’s got these.

I’m talking about rock solid plans to make them happen.

This is what happens when you “become your own boss” of your life.

You can build whatever you want.

Get Started:

Goal Setting

How To Deal With Boundary Violations

Setting Boundaries Is Easy

Easy Ways To Assert Yourself

Many guys have problems setting boundaries with girls. Partly because most guys aren’t getting nearly as much affection as they want, when they start getting it, they’ll put up with a lot of junk to keep it.

The trouble with this is when she’s violating you’re boundaries, and you don’t say anything, she correctly assumes that it’s OK.

One of the big myths about boundaries is that people somehow “know” what they are without you saying so. Like there’s some kind of social contract that everybody has read and agreed to that regulates what’s OK and what’s not OK.

But the harsh truth is that people will do whatever they think is appropriate, based on what they want, and what they imagine the repercussions will be.

And when it comes to male-female interactions, what people think are appropriate are largely based on how they were raised, parenting issues, early childhood experiences, and tons of other stuff that you simply will never know about.

Which means if you’re making assumptions about how she “should” act, you’re setting yourself up for a letdown.

So, what do you do?

First, you need to know what your boundaries are. You can’t define them if you don’t know them.

Now, this can be hard to do if you don’t have much experience. A good system is to simply listen to your gut. If she does something and it doesn’t feel “right” say something.

Of course, it can get confusing when you don’t know whether it’s a “test” or a “boundary violation.”

Usually a test is based on what she says, and a boundary violation is based on what she does.

And once she does something that makes you feel uncomfortable, it’s YOUR responsibility to mention it.

How do you mention it?

Don’t tell her what she should or shouldn’t do. That will only make things worse. Nobody likes to be told what they should or shouldn’t do, in any circumstance.

Instead, just say something like, “I don’t like it when you do that.” And let her respond.

This is pretty powerful. 


Because if she acts like she doesn’t care how her actions affect you, she’s not worth your time. She’s effectively disqualified herself.

On the other hand, if she genuinely makes a honest effort to not do that again, if only because it bothers you, that means she’s REALLY into you. 

Sadly, this won’t happen very often. Girls will ALWAYS push the boundaries to see what they can get away with.

Which is why you should ALWAYS be willing to simply walk away from her if she repeatedly violates your stated boundaries.

Because the ones that DO make an effort to respect your boundaries are the girls you’re looking for.

THESE are the girls that will create heaven on Earth for you.

Find Yours:

Girlfriend Generator

Her Attraction For You Is Never Set In Stone

Always Be Testing

Always Measure

There’s a lot of sales slogans that find their way into the realm of seduction and pickup.

Always be closing, always be prospecting, hot prospect, cold prospect, etc.

But there’s one that doesn’t get much air time, because it’s not really applicable to sales, or therapy, the two other areas where having persuasive language can be a benefit.

And that is to always be testing.

This is not intuitive, because it’s basic human nature to assume that everybody sees the world the way we see the world. And this can cause guys a LOT of grief in relationship building.

Guys see a girl, and become attracted to her. This is because the evolutionary triggers installed in our brains are based on how she looks more than anything else. Sure, it is also desirable for her to be smart, friendly, have a decent sense of humor, but for basic attraction, we need looks before we need anything else.

And once she’s got the right look, based on your type, that level of attraction is fixed, and won’t change, unless her body changes significantly.

With women, this is absolutely NOT true.

Just as we’d like to have things about her personality be true as an afterthought to her looks, girls are the opposite.

They’d like a guy who looks good as an afterthought to his personality. 

This is why it’s MUCH MORE LIKELY to see a decent looking girl with an ugly guy than the other way around.

If a guy has a strong personality, good social skills, is totally confident and enjoys being in his own skin, that’s generally good enough for most girls.

Which means her level of attraction for you is going to be dependent on how she feels AT THE MOMENT.

This is crucial in the early stages. Guys almost always make the mistake that if she likes him for the first night, then her attraction for him is set in stone (like his is for her) and he doesn’t have to do anything.

This is absolutely NOT TRUE.

Especially if you’re the type to go out and use “game” when you meet her first. You’re giving her a personality that’s NOT your real personality.

From a guys perspective, it would be a girl looking completely different than she did the night before.

So, it’s very likely that her level of attraction for you is going to ALWAYS be in flux the first few weeks or even months that you’re together.

Which means it’s YOUR RESPONSIBILITY to always measure her level of attraction. If it drops, adjust your behavior accordingly. If it’s up, keep doing whatever you were doing.

Is this fair? Maybe, maybe not. But that’s not the point. The point is if you don’t continuously measure her levels of attraction, you won’t know when it sinks, and you won’t know why she’s gone.

But if you learn to measure it and keep it up, she’ll be yours for good.