Category Archives: Love

Robot Love

How To Master Your Emotions

I’m a big fan of science fiction shows.

Especially well-written, futuristic ones.

There’s usually a character that is some kind of android, or advanced human, or Vulcan-like person.

Pure logic, zero emotions.

This sets up plenty of interesting scenes where some human is explaining emotions to the robot.

It’s like we admire those who are free from emotions, but at the same time we enjoy seeing somebody explain human emotions.

To be sure, they are the BEST and the WORST part about being human.

When you’re hitting on all cylinders, and you feel like the whole world has your back, nothing feels better.

On the other hand, when nothing works and everybody looks at you like you’ve just crawled out of a dumpster, nothing feels worse.

From a society perspective, our emotions are “glue” that keep us operating smoothly.

Guilt, fear, pleasure, desire. They ostensibly push us towards things that are good for us, and push us away from things that are bad for us.

It doesn’t help that the our emotions were created for a world FAR simpler than the one we’re living in.

This gives rise to situations that on the surface look fine, but underneath we feel like we are on an emotional roller coaster.

Most people know intellectually what to do to get ahead, for example. It’s the DOING that’s difficult.

Sure, if you talk to enough people, you’ll find the ideal business partner, or girlfriend or boyfriend.

It’s the TALKING that’s the tough part.

So we respond by telling ourselves all kinds of stories to make us feel better.

Usually on a subconscious level, so we aren’t really aware of what’s happening.

Then we’re no longer interacting with the REAL word, but one that’s partially based on our on interpretation.

But like anything else, being able to handle your emotions is a SKILL.

The more you practice, the better you’ll get.

Luckily, there are a LOT of ways to do this.

One is to just simply DO IT enough and desensitize yourself.

This takes massive courage, commitment, and time.

Luckily, there are TONS of mental exercises that can help.

Not only to build up your emotions BEFORE going into sketchy situations, but to help you respond much more resourcefully to unknown events.

There’s nothing worse than walking down the street, in a good mood, and then BAM!

Something happens and everything’s suddenly crap.

You can learn to BULLET PROOF yourself from those situations, no matter WHAT they are.

Learn How:

Emotional Freedom

Develop Magnetic Congruence

Line Up Your Parts

Align Thyself

One of the most powerful things a person can do is be congruent.

I’m sure you’ve heard this before, so it may not sound like anything new.

But one thing about any kind of self-development is it’s easy to get trapped in a world of vague words that don’t really mean anything.

One thing you learn if you study NLP is something called the “Meta Model.”

This is a set of language patterns designed to turn the vague into the specific.

As you can probably guess, they don’t work very well in polite conversation. Whenever we’re talking to others we are going to be necessarily vague.

If we show up and start asking “How specifically? Who specifically? Why specifically?” people are going to get pretty annoyed.

But when understanding ideas that can help us more easily get what we want, getting specific is necessary.

So back to that cool but vague word, “congruent.”

What EXACTLY does it mean?

In mathematics, it’s when two angles are the same.

But what does it mean in a social setting?

When somebody is behaving or communicating “congruently” what are they doing, specifically?

Think of the “parts” theory. We all have different parts. When we’re thinking about what to do on a Friday night, for example, part of us may want to go out, while another part of us wants to stay in.

If we are ever conflicted, in any behavior or communication, we are NOT congruent.

One way to tell when people are lying, for example, (certainly not foolproof) is when they break off eye contact, or become closed off physically.

They may not even know they’re doing it. They may even believe what they are saying, on one level.

But on another level, it feels “wrong.” 

If you’re in a relationship (and you’re paying attention) you can usually tell when somebody is not being congruent. They may do a good job of faking it, but it’s still pretty obvious.

(“Do you love me?” “Uh, yea, sure!”)

One of the most common ways we all display incongruence is when part of us wants something, but another part of us is afraid.

We ask our boss for a raise, for example. We are one hundred percent sure we WANT the raise, but when we ask, it’s tough to speak confidently. Part of us is afraid to ask, because we might get rejected.

Same with talking to attractive people, speaking up in meetings or in groups, or any other time we want to express ourselves.

As you can guess, one the biggest killers of congruence is fear. Fear of rejection, fear of dismissal, fear of being left behind.

The good news is that unless we’re facing down an angry tiger, our fears of false.

How do we get rid of them?

By getting in touch with our higher selves.

Get Started:

Kundalini Activator

Short Term Or Long Term?

Choose Wisely

The Virtue Of Dating Patience

It can be a lot of fun to figure out how to “cheat the system.” I remember long, long ago when Pac Man was pretty popular (Yep, I’m THAT old!) Once one of my buddies got a hold of some “cheats” we could easily get through the first few levels without getting eaten.

When NLP was first unleashed, it didn’t take long for it to move from therapy to the world of sales. And it didn’t take long after that to move into the world of seduction.

Before long, guys with just a little bit of skill were taking unsuspecting ladies and firing up their desires. Take something like fractionation for example.

This is a purely hypnotic phenomenon that was later applied to seduction. In a hypnosis setting, it basically means speaking hypnotically, and then speaking normally. Every time you go back to speaking hypnotically, the person goes deeper and deeper into trance. Put them in, take them out, and then when you put the in again, they go deeper.

This can work in dating as well. You can use the same technique. Speak hypnotically, then speak normally, or what they call “fluff talk.”

Or you can be a bit more sneaky. Talk to her in one part of the bar. Then take her to another part of the bar. Then take her to a little diner that only you know about. Then take her to the park next to the diner. Or wherever. The idea is that in a few hours, it will feel as though she’s been on several “dates” with you. 

If she’s the kind of girl who will only sleep with a guy after a few dates, you can accelerate the process.

But then you run into problems.

One of the reasons people take their time dating is to feel each other out. To get to know each other. Even if you have hard core criteria, it’s easy to forget about them.

Traditionally, the whole process of dating is so you can “feel each other out’ on an unconscious basis. So after a few dates, you sort of know if you’re each other’s type or not.

You’ll also be building up some powerful “glue” that will keep you together should you decide that you are each other’s type.

This “glue” simply won’t exist if you accelerate the process using technology. Nor will you have gone through the sorting process.

Sure, it’s pretty straightforward to use technology to get laid. But you’ll be missing out on the subconscious sorting process, AND the “glue building” that comes with creating a lot of shared experiences together BEFORE you get intimate.

The problem with many guys today is they are SO desperate to get laid, they’ll do anything. But once they get laid, they suddenly want that girl to become their girlfriend.

That tends to happen after sex, unless you’re especially jaded.

This, of course, can present a lot of problems.

Just something to consider next time you’re out and about. Ask yourself what you’re after. A short term fling or a long term relationship. Because often times, you cannot have both.

Why Waiting May Be A Good Idea

Good Things Come To Those Who Wait

Why Patience Is Always A Virtue

Attraction is a two way street. And it’s never static. What turns a woman on tonight might repulse her in a few weeks or months.

It’s a commonly held truth that those things you think are so cute in the beginning of a relationship will drive you nuts later on.

Since having a solid woman at your side through thick and thin is such a crucially important thing to most guys, it should take some time.

Think in terms of economics. Things that are the most valuable to us are the most costly. If it only costs you a few minutes time, it’s not going to be very valuable.

That girl that’s easy to f-close within a few hours of meeting her is simply not likely going to hold much long term value. Not that there’s anything wrong with short term flings. People enjoy them for many reasons.

Just understand short term flings are much different than long term, solid relationships built on mutual attraction and respect.

Unfortunately, many guys have bought the notion that any short term fling SHOULD somehow magically turn into a long term relationship.

This is natural. Before a guy has sex, he thinks of a girl a certain way. After he has sex (unless he’s super experienced or super jaded) he’s going to think of her a lot differently.

Our caveman brains think we’ll only be able to get laid with one or two women our entire lives. So as soon as a guy gets laid, his caveman brain starts telling him “She’s The One!”

Of course, most guys short term game is not really their true selves. It’s really just a show. So when the real him starts to show up, she gets turned off. That smooth operator she met the night before is now some needy beta who wants her to turn into wifey-poo.

Of course, short term flings can turn into long term relationships. Happens all the time. 

It just might not be the best strategy for finding that special someone to spend your life with.

That’s why criteria of a non-sexual, non-physical nature is essential. If you don’t have some, consider getting some.

Then once you’ve got some, consider screening her for non-sexual, non-physical criteria BEFORE you hit the sheets.

I know, this is not very popular advice. Obviously if you’re the “hit-it-and-quit-it” type, this won’t work.

But if you’re looking for something more, this may work for you.

Because while you’re filtering her based on non-sexual, non-physical criteria, something else is happening.

You’re building up a common experience. One of getting to know each other. One of spending time together based on the interaction between your brains. That is pretty rare these days.

It’s a lot of work, to be sure. And it will require a lot of “delayed gratification,” something most guys aren’t really capable of these days.

But if you ARE looking for something more permanent, this will help.

The Best Girl Problem To Have

When You Come To A Fork In The Road - Take It!

Should You Stay Or Should You Go?

Most guys would love to find a happy attractive girl to call their own. And be the happy attractive guy the girl calls her own.

Yet many guys run into all kinds of trouble when figuring out how to make that happen.

From a structural level, it’s pretty simple. First, figure out what you’re looking for. Looks, personality, family background, religion, politics, etc. Make a list of deal-makers and deal-breakers.

Once you’ve got a reasonable list, start sorting. 

How do you sort? 

Talk to any girl you see who might fit your criteria. Of course, one of your criteria MUST be that she be attracted to you, or else what’s the point?

Otherwise it’d be like trying to buy something that you simply can’t afford.

Now, if you did this, a couple of interesting things would happen.

You may start off realizing that your game absolutely sucks. Meaning that every single girl you talk to looks like she’s about to call the cops.

Now, at this point, two things would happen. You COULD decide women are all bitches, join your local MGTOW group and start building models or something.

OR you could decide to improve your game.


This is the beauty of human behavior. You don’t really need to know how. All you need to know is what you did didn’t work. So all you’ve got to do is do something different.

Start with different openers, or ice breakers. Change your clothes. Wear a different cologne. Anything.

And pretty soon you’ll start to notice small improvements. More and more girls will be interested in you. And some will begin to meet your criteria.

This is when something else pretty cool happens. The more skills you develop, the tighter your criteria will be.

A guy who’s never even kissed a girl will have completely different criteria than a guy that talks to and dates a whole range of women.

As your experience, confidence, and skill set grows, as will your criteria.

And pretty soon you’ll come to a very NICE problem to have.

Should you KEEP improving yourself, or should you pick ONE girl and stick with her?

Only you can answer that. But it’s certainly a nice problem to have.

But you’ll NEVER run into this problem if you remove yourself from the game completely.

How long should you spend going through this process?

Well, think about the benefits. A partner for life who will have your back through thick and thin, and you hers.

Don’t rush the process. Take your time. 

Enjoy your life, enjoy your skills. And enjoy the game.

Secret Seduction Practice

Get More Choice With Girls

Techniques To Enhance The Real You

Most guys would do anything to have more choice with the ladies.

In study after study, men’s deepest fantasies is plenty of anonymous sex with random strangers.

A guy walks into a club, and sees all the cuties dressed in their hottest club gear.

He quickly imagines having the power to walk up to any of them, spit out a few memorized lines, and have her suddenly fall into a deep hypnotic trance where she’ll beg to please him in any way he wants.

It’s no wonder courses that allegedly teach these things make gurus so much money.

And guess what? Often times it actually works. Some of the language patters in those courses are pretty powerful. Said with confidence and congruence, you can generate some pretty deep and powerful emotions, pretty quickly.

I saw this movie on Netflix a while back, really cheesy, that made a good point. These goofs had discovered this magic shirt. Whenever they wore it, the ladies were their willing sex slaves.

At one point, some guy convinced himself it was him, and not the shirt. So in the middle of a session with a young hottie, he took off the shirt, showing his pasty overweight belly and man-boobs.

All of a sudden she looked as if she was about to vomit.

“Oh my God! What am I doing!?” She asked.

The point is that while those patterns CAN work, they won’t work for long, UNLESS they are part of who you are. Meaning you always talk and act and behave like that.

Most guys don’t. Especially if you’re using memorized patterns, or techniques, or “gambits” any other “pick up technology.”

Once she sees the real you, she’ll wonder how she got there. And if you’ve developed some emotional feelings (totally normal after having sex) you can get hurt pretty badly.

So in a sense, using any kind of “pick up technology” or “game” that isn’t part of the real you is pretty dangerous for your own emotions.

What’s a better alternative?

Improve the real you. And here’s a POWERFUL way to do that.

Simply practice DISQUALIFYING girls. Most guys see girls as these perfect angels who have the keys to heaven up between their legs.

But some girls are just crazy. Just like some guys. They’ll do more damage to your psyche than you realize. Getting into a relationship with the WRONG girl can set your self esteem back YEARS. (Same for girls and the wrong guys).

Believe it or not, some guys NEVER recover. They become bitter women haters for life. (So do plenty of women).

So, how do you practice? First, come up with some solid personality traits that your “dream girl” MUST have.

Then talk to a girl long enough to DISQUALIFY her.

Believe it or not, disqualifying a girl BEFORE she disqualifies you can give you a strong burst of confidence, and go a long ways in destroying all your desperation.

The only requirement is you disqualify girls you’re actually talking to, that are showing signs of interest.

Don’t be mean, don’t be rude or crude, don’t even tell her she’s disqualified. Just politely end the conversation WITHOUT exchanging any contact information.

If you absolutely FORGOT about any kind of success, and simply practiced DISQUALIFYING, (based on actual conversations, and not ego protecting BS) your genuine self confidence would go through the roof.

Your conversational skills would improve, and so would the strength of your frame.

All qualities women are DESPERATE for in a man.

Mythical Traits Of Women

Got Girl Problems? Look Right Here!

She’s Right In Front Of You!

Many guys see women as objects, rather than people.

This is pretty obvious. But it manifests itself in a way that is very damaging to the men, rather than the women.

Men tend to assume them women fall into different “categories.” To an extent this is true. Of women as well as men. Physical appearances, religious beliefs, cooking skills, family background, etc.

One thing that all men claim to be “looking for” is a “high quality women.”

The act as if her overall “quality” is something like her height or her political affiliation.

If only it were that simple!

(You want republicans, go to a republican fund raiser!)

But you ask guys what they mean by “quality woman” they’ll usually say things like loyalty, integrity, won’t cheat on you, etc.

Now, this may not be something you enjoy reading about, but consider this “model” of the female population available to you.

ALL WOMEN can potentially become high quality women.


If a woman feels DEEP ATTRACTION to you, she’ll be loyal. She won’t cheat on you. She’ll eagerly follow you if you get transferred across the country.

The problem is most guys couldn’t create attraction to save their lives. They go out, talk to a few girls, get laid, and suddenly think they’ve got mad seduction skills.

But consider this. There’s a whole RANGE of attraction that you can create. And the simple truth about society today is that many girls and guys will jump into the sack without needing much convincing.

Absolutely nothing wrong with.

But what is troublesome is when a guy assumes that because a girl slept with him, it means she’s attracted to him as much as she can be.

But consider this.

On the scale of female attraction, getting her to sleep with you is maybe a 4 or 5 out of ten.

But getting her to feel ENOUGH attraction to behave like a “quality woman” she’s going to need to feel attraction at least 8 or higher, out of ten.

And sadly, most guys just aren’t capable of creating that kind of attraction in the girls they are interested in.

So what you have is all these girls interacting with all these guys. Sure, everybody’s banging each other, but nobody’s feeling levels of attraction more than luke-warm.

This leaves guys thinking there are no quality women, and this leaves girls thinking that this level of attraction is all they’re going to get.

Which makes them start coming up with these ridiculous lists you hear guys complaining about.

Certain income, certain height, job prospects, car, home, etc.

That’s natural.

Think of it this way. Imagine going out and picking up girls. Imagine ALL the girls you found were only 4’s and 5’s according to your scale.

How would you respond?

You’d probably start demanding that they have a LOT more going for them than their looks.

So if you want a quality woman, you’re going to have to take a good, long look in the mirror.

Accept responsibility, and start to work on your skills.

The Secret Of Getting Girls To Fall In Love With You

How To Create Love

Is Love Possible To Engineer?

A long, long time, conversational hypnosis was invented. Some guy (a genius really) in a wheelchair needed to come up with a more effective way of hypnotizing people.

Even even though they were coming to see a hypnotist, to be hypnotized, they still were afraid. So they still had their mental shields.

Enter the Milton Model.

This is when Milton Erickson invented a new form of hypnosis that wasn’t really dependent on the client voluntarily going into hypnosis.

He would talk to them a little “strange.” Not so strange they thought they were being hypnotized. But strange enough so they still paid attention, even though most of the time they didn’t know what the heck he was talking about.

Then they would leave his office, confused, thinking maybe they’d wasted their money. Only their problems were GONE.


Then some guys figured out how he “talked” and taught it to others. They figured it would be great for therapy. Of course, it didn’t take long after that for people to use it in sales, (to make a lot of money) and seduction (to have a lot of sex).

However, something happened along the way, and a lot of men today are very angry. They feel cheated. They feel as if they’ve discovered the “truth” about women, and they don’t like it.

And if you keep reading, you may not like what you’re about to hear either.

Sure, these patterns work great on firing up emotions. They work great in sales, because they get to the heart of the deep feelings the customer is trying to satisfy. Which means they can help salespeople create some very valuable and profitable relationships with their customers.

But picking up girls is VASTLY different than selling things to customers.

A customer walks into your shop, and they want something. They know they want something. You know they know they want something. They know you know they know they want something. (Ok, enough already!)

So you create rapport, and talk about what they want. They share why they want what they want. You build up their feelings, and attach those feelings to your product. They buy it, and go home. They are happy. You are happy.

Next time they want to buy something, they think of you. Because you made them feel happy about buying something.

Girls are different.

Girls don’t go shopping for a boyfriend or a husband. Girls like romance. (Many guys do also, but we’re terrified to admit it.)

They want it to “just happen.”

Now, with these language patterns, you can make it “just happen.”

At least in the short term.

But think of one very important thing. A girl deciding to have sex is NOT the same thing as a girl falling in love with you and wanting you to be her boyfriend.

Those feelings take a long time. She needs to see you several times. Those thoughts need to bubble up in her mind on their own. 

Mother Nature made damn sure most girls don’t fall head-over-heels in love with guys at the drop of a hat.

They are VERY HARD to create. They are much different than those “let’s have sex” feelings.

Many guys don’t get this. They think if they talk to her, build up her emotions enough to get her in between the sheets, that’s good enough.

It’s sometimes is, but usually not.

Deep feelings of love take a lot longer to create. Because they must be real, not fake.

Which means YOU must be real, and not fake. Which means you must RISK getting rejected.

Not from approaching her, but from dating her a couple months and then getting dumped.

If you want to get laid, you’re going to have to overcome approach anxiety. Once you do, talk to enough girls, and you’ll get laid.

But if you want to create a real relationships, you’re going to have to do a lot more.

It’s certainly not easy, and it’s not quick. 

But it certainly is worth it.

Essential Mind Tools: