The other night I watched that Facebook movie on Netflix.
They had those guys that were on the rowing teams.
Most sports are a combination of skills, strengths, endurance, strategy and teamwork.
But in that kind of competition, teamwork can make or break you.
You can be weaker physically, but if you are “in sync” much more than everybody else, you’ll win.
When I was in high school I had this girlfriend. After the initial excitement wore off, our dates were pretty similar.
“Where do you want to go?”
“I dunno, where do you want to go?”
And we’d end up driving around in circles. Not really circles, but we wouldn’t ever do anything interesting, since we never had much of a plan.
One of the secrets of a good relationship is compatibility. Sure, there’s got to be physical and emotional attraction, but if you aren’t mostly compatible, it’s not going to work.
One thing that can mess up us humans is the idea of a “mismatch.”
We can be mismatched in our jobs, wrong skills at the wrong company. In a relationship. In a major in college. Even choosing a movie to watch. You get about ten minutes in and think, “Hmm. This isn’t for me.”
One of the most common mismatches is our instincts.
They were designed to help us during hunter gatherer times, but they mess us up now.
Back then, it made sense to eat everything in sight whenever you could.
Not so much now.
Back then, everybody was egalitarian. Meaning they all shared the wealth, which in those days was food.
But now, you see some ultra rich person in front of you at the supermarket, on some level it FEELS like they’re “cheating” because they are not sharing with you.
But unless you know HOW they got all their money, you can’t really judge them.
Assuming “cause-effect” relationships were none exist is also a holdover.
Back then, even if you were wrong nine times out of ten, but that one time out of ten kept you alive, assuming cause effect relationships where none existed (loud noises equals danger, for example) kept you alive.
The ancient dudes who wanted to investigate everything in meticulous detail eventually got eaten.
However, there are WAY more variables today than back then.
Not only that, but it’s WAY less dangerous.
So those “cause-effect” relationships we assume are true are FALSE probably 99.99% of the time.
And when they ARE true, we wont’ die. Not even close. Maybe feel some social discomfort.
But our ancient brains haven’t been updated.
Or at least not very much.
The good news is with some consistent and creative imagination, journaling, and VERY SMALL risks on a daily basis, you can retrain your brain to see the world much more accurately, and much more in your favor.
So taking those actions to get you what you want (money, companionship, sex, fame, social status, income, wealth, whatever) will be natural and easy.