Category Archives: Cheated

Feel Cheated?

Do You Feel Cheated By Life?

I had this friend once that would come up with the craziest ideas.

These were business ideas, that he actually thought would make us money.

But they were based on some really nonsensical assumptions.

Kind of like in the movies, when criminals are planning a heist, and their biggest “escape plan” is, “Who’s going to know?”

Of course, once they plan a crime from that standpoint, they overlook tons of variables.

One of the common mistakes we make as people is to ASSUME that simply because we WANT something, we SHOULD get it.

Even if we feel like this just a little bit, it feels like we’ve been cheated if we DON’T get it.

This happens all the time with guys and dating.

They flirt with a girl from across the room. Then walk over, and start talking to her, and she goes cold.

They feel cheated. As if they DESERVED to get her number.

They don’t consider that she perceived him DIFFERENTLY before and after she talked to him.

Her opinion of him CHANGED once they started talking. She updated her idea of him with new information.

But from the guy’s standpoint, he feels like she purposely tricked him.

This is also very common in sales. Somebody is thinking about buying a product. They salesperson starts to ASSUME he or she is going to make a commission.

But then the customer changes their mind. Just like all humans ALWAYS do ALL THE TIME.

But the salesperson feels “cheated.”

Now, it is absolutely necessary to make assumptions. We humans NEVER will have enough information to accurately predict the future.

So we will always have to guess. If we’ve got any kind of experience, we can use that experience to predict, or make assumptions about what will happen.

Of course, if we OVERLY assume good things, and we don’t get it, we can feel cheated.

But if we OVERLY assume bad things, we get scared and we won’t take action.

The “trick” or SKILL is to develop a strong, ever-present sense of “let’s see what happens.”

We do this naturally when we play sports. ESPECIALLY if we suck.

If you’re shooting free throws, for example, you don’t feel like you’re going to die, or never be a success, or end up homeless if you miss a free throw.

You shoot, see what happens (get feedback) and try again.

If you keep shooting (practicing) you’ll eventually get better.

Pretty soon, you’ll KNOW that you shoot at a certain percentage.

How can you treat ALL ACTION like this?


Practice keeping the “let’s see what happens” mindset whenever doing ANYTHING.

ESPECIALLY things that are moving you closer to your biggest goals in life.

There are MANY ways to do this.

Visualization exercises, journaling exercies, and reframes.

You can learn them here: