Shoot Only At Painted Targets
This, of course, is a metaphor, so let’s dig a little bit deeper. If you shoot at a target, one that’s already painted, you might miss.
But if you shoot at a blank piece of wood, and THEN paint the target around it, you can claim you’re some kind of super ninja archer.
Only if people see you doing this, they’ll know you’re a fraud.
And if you do this a lot, you might get into trouble. You might start to BELIEVE you are a super ninja archer. But in reality you’re shooting arrows willy-nilly all over the place. Which means you’ll eventually shoot one somewhere that might get you into trouble.
How does this translate to the dating game? Most guys have ZERO consciously determined criteria. All they know is they want a hot girl that won’t throw a drink in their face or kick them in the nuts when they ask for a number.
If she dates him, “lets” him sleep with her, he’s on cloud nine. This is when he starts “painting the target around the arrow.”
Since all he knows about her is that she’s hot and she’s “letting him” access the holiest of holies, he starts to “imagine” that she’s the ideal woman. He’ll reverse engineer his own belief system to match hers, so he won’t have to face a cold harsh truth:
They most likely have NOTHING in common.
This is why when the early excitement wears off, they can’t stand each other. Usually this happens to one partner before the other, and somebody gets dumped.
And they spend the next year and potentially thousands of dollars trying to “get their ex back.”
How can you avoid such a common occurrence?
Easy.
Simply choose criteria consciously, and make sure she matches that criteria BEFORE you get physical.
Because when you get physical, your deeply programmed caveman will take over and convince your conscious mind that she’s PERFECT.
Take some time to develop some criteria. Stuff about her personality. Her intelligence. Her habits. Her beliefs.
Sure, you’ll get laid a LOT less.
But when you do, it will be with somebody who has a LOT in common with you.
Which means it will be much more likely to turn into a relationship that’s got a LOT MORE going on than pure physical fun.