Imagine if you tried swimming using the following method.

You stood there on the side of the pool, shaking from fear. All your buddies were swimming, but you weren’t sure if you could do it.

Maybe you looked at a point off in the distance, and imagined how cool it would be to swim over there. Then you imagined the cold hand of death grabbing your ankle and pulling you down to the lonely bottom.

You grit your teeth, and jump in. Only you don’t try and swim. You just kind of float there. Then suddenly your instincts kick in, and you start dog paddling. Everybody’s laughing. You paddle back to where you came from, and climb out.

Absolutely humiliated.

This is very similar to what most guys do when they approach girls. Especially when they’re nervous while approaching.

Now, if you’re nervous and you approach anyway, congratulations. Most guys can’t do this.

But when you approach, there’s some things you can do to make it a lot easier, and some things to do that will make it a lot harder.

The thoughts you hold in your head WHILE approaching are crucial. If you don’t purposely hold positive thoughts, your caveman brain will take over.

This is like you dog paddling in the pool. Running on instincts.

But if you approach with some positive thoughts, and HOLD those thoughts, it will be a lot easier.

This would be like swimming the crawl, based on conscious thinking, rather than dog paddling, based on instinct.

Every action you take, there’s a battle going on in your mind. Your conscious, rational self, vs. your caveman instincts.

Your caveman instincts are usually only good if you’re in a caveman environment. Like there’s some sort of horrible, life threatening danger, and you’ve got to take care of business.

But when talking to cute girls, your caveman brain is NOT your friend.

Your conscious mind is.

What thoughts should you think?

Firstly, you’ll need to FORCE them in the forefront of your brain. Like you might need to consciously remember how to swim.

Any thoughts of any positive EXPERIENCES with women will do. Ideally, you should have a positive experience in the recent past, and one in the near future. Which will take place AFTER you talk to the girl you’re about to talk to.

Any positive experience will work. A girl that smiled at you. A cute girl you talked to at Starbucks (whether she was working there or not.)

ANY experience will do.

This works for many reasons.

You won’t see the girl you’re about to talk to as a life or death situation. 

Which means you’ll significantly tone down any neediness or desperation. She’ll pick up on this, and this will increase her likelihood of being attracted to you.

Now, this can be tough to do if you don’t have ANY positive experiences with women. But you can certainly go and get some.

Just hit up some shops or restaurants around town where cute girls work. DO NOT try and pick them up. Just be friendly with them. Go in once a week or so. Learn their names, and tell them yours.

Remember, these are NOT girls you are picking up or number closing or getting advice from or anything. Just some girls to have a friendly, BRIEF, chit-chat with while you drink your coffee or whatever.

THEN, when you see some girls you’d like to talk to, for real, think of those “practice girls” while you do so.

Do this long enough, and you’ll be building up a HUGE amount of positive experiences with women.

Just remember that this ISN’T automatic, at least not at first. The first couple dozen times you talk to real girls, in the real world, you’ll need to FORCE your brain to think of those positive experiences, WHILE APPROACHING and WHILE TALKING.

But if you keep it up, that feeling of “good experiences with women” WILL become automatic.

And you’ll have suddenly turned into a natural.

mindpersuasion.com