Sometimes being able to unlearn something is more important than learning something.

Often times when we want something we think we can’t get, we imagine that we need to do something that we’re not doing, or learn something that we don’t know, or think something that we’re not thinking.

(huh?)

Sometimes though it’s what we STOP doing that will get us what we want, rather than what we START doing.

As we move from childhood to adulthood, this idea shows up a lot. We stop depending things “outside” of us, and start depending on our own, self-generated actions and decisions.

You stop depending on the training wheels, and start depending on your own sense of balance.

You stop expecting free money in the form of an allowance, and get a part time job.

You stop feeling the need to ask for permission (which also means if you mess up it’s not really your fault) and start trying things out on your own, just to see what will happen.

Now, it’s pretty clear that some people are better at this than others. Some people take to risk and trial and error based behaviors like a duck to water.

Others are terrified of leaving the safety of authority and conformity.

Neither one is “better” than the other, since “better” can only be determined by what you value.

If you’re content to take what you’re given, and happen to be in a situation where you’re given some pretty good stuff, then you’ve got it pretty good.

On the other hand, if you want a lot more than what other people decide to “give you” then you’ll need to take some risks.

A lot of people shy away from that word. They imagine taking a risk, failing, and ending up homeless, or shunned by society.

This can lead to overcompensation. Taking no risks at all. Only playing it safe.

But not all risks have to be huge. Not all risks entail putting your life’s savings on a one time stock tip.

Every time you talk to a stranger, you’re taking a small risk. They might like you, they might ignore you.

Every time you call about an ad for a job, you’re taking a small risk. They might hire you and think you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread, or they may laugh at you and hang up.

If you believe that any risk is dangerous, and even the smallest rejection will destroy your ego, it will.

But if you believe that all risks comes with rewards, either getting what you want, or getting you more information that will help you get what you want, they will.

To feel comfortable with risks, and see opportunities where others fear to tread, check this out:

Belief Change