Category Archives: Conversational Skills

Have You Discovered Your True Purpose?

Overcome Fear With Easy Mind Control

How To Embrace and Overcome Fear

Your history is one of incredibly accomplishment.

Despite how we humans try and take away risk and uncertainty, there’s still plenty to go around.

I read this very interesting history book a while back that said the story of man is a story of a timid, fearful, and lazy people trying to invent new things to make life easier, safer and less scary.

Regardless of who you are and where you come from, you’ve demonstrated countless times that you are fully capable of facing risk in the face, taking action, and getting what you want.

The fact that you are reading this now is proof of this.

So why do we still feel timid, afraid and on the fence whenever an opportunity presents itself?

One of the reasons is our brains are hard wired to be more aware of potential danger than potential opportunities.

This is a biological, chemical and physical aspect of our brains. The neural pathways that carry fear based impulses are physically thicker than the pathways that carry potential pleasure.

We all like to eat, right? Imagine you’re sitting there in your favorite restaurant, about to dig into your favorite food. Just as you’re about to bite into it, a huge tiger appears to your right.

What happens to your hunger? It vanishes quicker than a sliver of ice in a volcano!

On a very basic, primitive level, moving toward pleasure is great, so long as our lives aren’t in danger.

But as I’m sure you know, living in the modern world is rarely a life or death decision. Far far from it.

But our primitive brains sometimes can’t tell the difference.

Sure, you might logically conclude that there’s no danger walking over and talking to that interesting looking stranger, but  your subconscious might have something to say about it.

But as I mentioned above, you’ve got a HUGE collection of experiences where you looked fear in the eye, laughed at it, and took action anyhow.

Once you learn how to access THOSE memories, automatically, instead of those other ones, it will be easy.

Instead of seeming like some scary event after scary event, life will become an adventure. Trying and “failing” won’t feel bad, it will feel good. Because every step, no matter what happens, is a step closer to what you want.

No matter what it is.

That’s what the Frame Control program is all about. To shift your automatic thinking from recalling times when you felt like a “victim” to those times when you were a champion.

When that happens, you’ll walk the Earth with a purpose.

And many people will follow.

Get started:

Frame Control

How To Skyrocket Your Attraction

Get Everybody On Your Johnson

How To Make All The Girls Want You

Most guys have several fears about approaching a girl and getting rejected.

To be sure, it’s that moment where she says “no” that’s pretty painful.

It’s also pretty painful, as most guys imagine everybody else is watching them.

One more reason it sucks is because most guys have been told or taught that if you try and number close every girl in the joint, you’ll be seen as some player who’s only after short term flings.

Now if you ARE only after short term flings, then that’s not a big deal.

But here’s something to consider. People ARE watching you, especially girls. And in that first moment you walk up to a girl, all the other girls who’ve got you on their radar (which is usually a lot more than you think) are thinking the same thing:

“Why’s he talking to HER?”

As I’m sure you know, girls are terribly competitive. Even if they have ZERO intentions of giving our their number, they STILL don’t like it when you approach somebody else and not them.

This is pretty fun to see when you’re actually looking for it. To see it in action, try this out:

Go somewhere where you can sit and watch people walking by. Then wait until there’re a couple of girls walking toward you, that are a good distance apart. Like maybe opposite sides of the street or something.

Then OBVIOUSLY check out one of them, long enough for the other one to notice (which won’t take long).

Then as soon as you STOP checking out girl A, quickly look at girl B on the sly. She’ll almost ALWAYS be staring at girl A, wondering why you were checking her out.

Bottom line, even if you aren’t a player, are good looking, or have any bling to speak of, girls will STILL get jealous when you talk to other girls instead of them.

But this will be significantly REDUCED if you’re going up and getting shot down all the time.

So here’s a really good way to increase your charisma, magnetism and attraction. Go and talk to a few girls, but DON’T try to close them. Your ONLY goal is to get them to smile.

As soon as you get a genuine smile or laugh, EJECT. Be nice, say nice talking to you, whatever, but LEAVE while they still have that smile on their face.

If you do this with three or four girls, separated out by twenty minutes or so, the other girls in the place will be going CRAZY.

So long as you’re not in some super loud nightclub packed wall to wall like sardines, this will work pretty good.

Then after you’ve had your fun, go and close somebody for real. 

To give you even more power, check this out:

Frame Control

Your Inherently Programmed Recipe For Greatness

Build Your Life Any Way You Want

How To Build Any Life You Want

Being able to reverse engineer something is a great talent.

Companies, restaurants, writers, artists, even governments do this all the time.

In fact, copying others and improving on what they are doing is the cornerstone of human advancement.

Ever since the first caveman saw another caveman throw a rock, and thought to himself, “Hmm, great idea, but I think I could do it better…” humans were off to the races.

Of course, some things are easier to copy or “reverse engineer” than others. Some of them are more conscious and some are unconscious.

When you were a kid, before you could walk, learning was simply of watching the adults and trying until you could reproduce what they were doing. Talking was the same. And to an extent, so was writing.

However, if you were an engineer for an electronics company, and they wanted you to reverse engineer your competition’s smart phone, it would be completely conscious.

We can also reverse engineer behavior, but it can be tricky. Often times we copy the external behavior, when it’s the internal state we should be focused on.

For example, if you wanted to copy a world class pianist, it would be foolish to only focus on the clothes they wore, or their posture or even facial expressions as they sat down at the piano.

You’d need to get inside their brain and copy their beliefs, and more importantly, their experiences and memories of practice, which likely is a large factor in their confidence.

Because playing the piano is not a natural human trait, it requires years and years of practice.

But other things, that sometimes seem difficult, ARE natural human traits, and therefore DON’T require years and years of practice.

Anything involving human interaction, communication and persuasion is hard wired into our brains.

Often times all you need is a strong inner state, and you can learn the rest by trial and error, just like you did when you learned to walk.

Because of your strong confidence and self belief, you’ll naturally interact with others in a way that will help you get exactly what you not.

Not only that, but it will seem to others like it was THEIR idea to give it to you.

This is what happens when you demonstrate that strong inner frame. That frame where you tell yourself (just like when you were a kid), “I can do this,” no matter what.

How do you get this frame?

By doing a set of mental activities (much like mental exercise) and switching how you view yourself, and the world.

To learn how, click this:

Frame Control

The Exchange Model Of Seduction

Exchange Emotions Instead of Beg For Them

Get Your Mind Right!

There’s one problem that’s pretty common (among guys) when getting out and interacting with females. An overestimation of HER worth, and an underestimation of YOUR worth.

The thing to understand about ALL human interactions they are based on exchange.

Sure, when we’re kids and in a family, we just get what we need without really having to give anything back.

But once we grow up and put on our big boy pants, that crap needs to get tossed out the window.

Nobody’s going to give you anything just because you think you deserve it.

Especially girls, girls who have options (which is the kind of girls you SHOULD be going after, but that’s another argument completely.)

In order for any girl worth her salt to spend any time with you, she’s got to be getting something out of the deal.

She needs to benefit just much as you are benefiting.

Granted, this all happens on a subconscious level, but it’s still there.

If you don’t create those emotions and feelings in her that she wants from you, she’s not going to give you those emotions and feelings you want from her.

Luckily, this is pretty automatic. Both men and women are hard wired to reciprocate when we get out buttons pushed in the right way.

The only trouble comes when you assume she’s got more to offer you than you’ve got to offer her.

To make it worse,  if you walk to her with an emotional “trade deficit” AND an expectation that she SHOULD feel a certain way, it’s going to make it even harder.

Both of these problems go hand in hand. Which means once you get rid of one, you’ll usually get rid of the other.

How do you do this?

First, understand how attraction works. We usually need to feel attraction first, before we are willing to create attraction in others, even subconsciously.

No girl is going to be sweet and feminine and affectionate with you unless she ALREADY feels those feelings for you.

The next step is to stop overestimating her value, AND to stop underestimating your own value.

Don’t walk over there with a puffed up chest thinking your king Alpha of the Planet, but DO have an honest appreciation for your strong points.

Then just go over and talk to her.

See it as a discovery process. Show her what you’ve got, and see what she’s got.

If you’re both feeling it, good job. If not, it’s NOBODY’S fault. Nobody’s cheating anybody. Nobody is manipulating anybody. Nobody’s dissing anybody.

Think of it like setting up a booth at your local flea market. Do you get super pissed when people wander by without buying anything? Nope. You just hang until you see people that ARE interested in what you’ve got.

Luckily, for most guys, that only means finding ONE girl when it comes to romance.

So get out there and mingle until you find her.

This will help:

Frame Control

How To Turn Her On

Talk Your Way Into Her Heart

How To Talk Girls Into Attraction

Many decades ago, Dale Carnegie taught the easiest way to talk to people is to talk about the thing that we all love talking about.

Ourselves.

So if you’re wanting to walk up and talk to pretty girls, in a way that will get them REALLY interested in you, this is a very useful bit of information.

Of course, HOW you do this will impact how well it works.

If you walk up to some gorgeous girl and say, “Wow, you’re gorgeous!”

You won’t get very far. One because she either hears this all the time, or she KNOWS this since everywhere she goes guys are staring at her with those unmistakable eyes of lust.

So you’re not really telling her anything new, and you’re not really showing any insight to who she is.

Believe it or not, super gorgeous girls would really like guys to like them for something OTHER than their looks.

How do we know this?

Because they talk. If gorgeous girls WERE just content to show up and be beautiful, they would never say anything. They’d just sit there and be happy to have guys stare at their boobs (or whatever).

But since they actually open their mouths, and actual words come out that describe the actual ideas in their heads, they would actually like somebody to take an interest in something BESIDES their boobs.

Hang on, we’re just getting started.

You can’t ask her opinion on something, and then tell her how awesome she is for having that opinion.

That’s too easy. She doesn’t want to be surrounded by spineless yes men.

You’ve got to do a little bit more work.

So, what do you talk about? Talk about her plans, her dreams, her ideas about complicated things (things YOU think are complicated, not things you think she thinks are complicated).

Get her to expand on that. See past her boobs and her surface structure language.

Find things deep beneath the surface that is really worth talking about.

Think of the conversation as a treasure hunt. Look for complicated ideas, opinions, plans and dreams way beneath the surface that you can find some overlap with your own deep structure.

That’s that DEEP connection that everybody is looking for.

But here’s the bad news. Most people don’t have much below the surface. Most people (guys and girls) are really filled with useless fluff.

This means you’ll need to talk to a lot of goofs before you find somebody worth your time.

But this realization in and of itself will have a pretty cool side effect.

When you look out into a sea of beautiful girls, you’ll realize that most of them really WON’T be worth your time. You’ll see it as a sorting process, rather than a horribly scary field of unending rejection land mines.

Which will make it much easier to talk to, qualify and more importantly, DISQUALIFY gorgeous girls.

Since this is something most guys know NOTHING about, you will have a HUGE advantage, and will be much, much more attractive.

This will help:

Frame Control

Silly Card Games Of Life

Increase Your Odds

How Project Massive Power

There’s this goofy “poker” game that you might know about.

Everybody takes one card, and holds it to their head, away from them.

Nobody knows what card they have, but they can tell which card everybody else has.

Other than that, it plays out like regular poker. You bet, raise, etc, and whoever has the highest card collects the money.

But unlike normal poker, where you see your own cards, and have to rely only on body language to gauge the strength of the other players’ cards, you have to guess what your own card is by the body language and facial expressions of the others.

For example, if they look at your card, and burst out laughing, it’s probably a good idea to fold, because you probably have a low card.

On the other hand, if they all look at your card and then fold, it means you’ve got a pretty high card.

This is the EXACT process humans go through when put together in a group setting when the people DON’T know each other.

They quickly look around, and see how “strong” the other people are.

And just like that poker game, we aren’t usually very good judges of our own strength, but we’re VERY good at sniffing out the strengths of others.

Most of us UNDERESTIMATE our own strengths. Which is why we can be surprised when people come to us for guidance or ask us for our opinions.

Unless you’ve wanted to be a world class politician since you were a kid, you probably don’t go into situations looking to take charge.

The problem is, neither do most other people.

That card game mentioned above gets pretty interesting when everybody has a medium strength card. Nobody knows whose is higher, and nobody knows whose is lower. People spend a lot of time looking at the other cards, and try to find their place among them.

This is the same in groups. Most people sit around, waiting for somebody else to take charge.

Why do that?

Why not take charge? Why not step up and help everybody out?

After all, you’re not stepping on anybody’s toes. You’re not taking something from them. You are actually doing what they WANT you to do.

Most people are terrified to lead. Most people are happy to be followers.

Nothing wrong with that. Leading can create stress, anxiety, and you’ve got to make tough decisions that might not always work out.

But the benefits are extraordinary. Genuine respect, admiration, and support.

Luckily, being a leader in any group starts with a simple decision.

Are you ready?

Learn more:

Frame Control

How Do You See The World?

Stop Playing The Victim Card

Stop Playing The Victim Card

It’s easy to feel like a victim.

In fact, it’s so easy that everybody does it.

Only when we do it ourselves, we don’t feel like we’re playing the victim card.

It’s one of those things that’s really easy to spot in others, but very hard to see in ourselves.

Kind of like being in a dysfunctional relationship vs. having a friend in a dysfunctional relationship.

From the outside in, it’s pretty obvious to see that it’s not going to end well.

But from the inside out, it feels like we just need to fix that one “thing” and everything will be swell.

Here’s a quick self-check to see if you’re playing the victim card:

Think of something you want, right now, but have some trouble getting.

Got it?

Now, why don’t you have it?

If you come up with ANY reason OTHER than your own behaviors, you’re playing the victim card.

Harsh, I know. Especially when it REALLY IS something “out there” that’s holding you back.

But even when that’s true, pointing the finger will NEVER do you any good.

None of the superstars of history, the great artists, inventors, creators, builders ever got where they did by pointing their fingers long enough and hard enough.

They all accepted where they were, what they had, and did something with it.

Clearly, some people have a head start. Some a HUGE one. Great genes, a great bank account, a nice house from which to operate and learn about the world as they grow up.

But so what? 

Plenty of people started with absolutely NOTHING. No money, no family, not even native English skills, and they built fortunes. Empires. Huge, multi-generational businesses.

Well, that’s not really true. They DID have something.

Vision. Belief. Resilience.

That’s all you really need.

When you look out into the world, what do you see? A harsh environment that will slap you down and prove your limitations?

Or a huge collection of untapped opportunities upon which to operate?

It all starts on the inside. 

When you play the victim card, you might get some help, but that’s only to get you to be quiet and go away.

But when you play the HERO card, when you establish your true place on this Earth, the opposite will happen.

People will WANT to help you. To follow you. To just be around you.

Are you ready?

Learn how:

Frame Control

Mind Tricks To Destroy Approach Anxiety

Give Her An Opportunity, Don't Ask For Her To Accept You

Ancient Secrets For Modern Seduction

In ancient societies, there were two ways to go to war with neighboring tribes.

One was the old fashioned way, where you show up with a bunch of guys and clubs and start swinging.

Even if you “win” this is pretty dangerous. You can lose a lot of good guys this way. That’s why  most ancient tribes, and even certain primates, rarely have a full on battle. 

They usually have “raiding parties” where they swoop in while everybody is sleeping, bash a few guys, take a bunch of stuff, and then leave before anybody knows what’s up.

In other ancient societies, they have a much more advanced form of warfare. One tribe will show up to another tribe with a bunch of gifts.

It’s kind of rude to not accept a bunch of gifts, since it usually leads to old school fighting. So the receiving tribe is pretty much forced to accept the gifts.

Which puts them on a lower standing from a social status position. When you show up and DEMAND gifts, that’s one thing. But when you show up unexpected and GIVE gifts, it’s much more powerful.

We humans do this all the time. We do an unasked for “favor,” and then act like they are in our debt. You do this, and this is done to you.

But there’s a pretty sneaky way you can use this to destroy any approach anxiety.

How?

Just see yourself as giving her the opportunity to get to know you. Now, this ONLY works on getting rid of that initial approach anxiety. It’s not a sure fire pick up method, and you STILL have to talk to her in a way that fires up her emotions.

But if you are too nervous to approach her, then none of that will matter anyway.

Most guys, when they approach, act like they are asking for something. Meaning a guy walks up to a girl, and they think they can get “rejected.”

Even thinking that “rejection” is even possible presumes that she’s got more power than you. She has the power to accept you, and she has the power to reject you.

But this feeling will lessen considerably when you imagine you’re giving her an opportunity.

Which you are. Again, you are NOT imagining that you’re God’s gift to women, or expecting anything from her.

But if you just see it from an objective standpoint, a guy talking to a girl, with BOTH of them thinking that maybe it will turn into something more, it will be a lot easier.

Think about it from her perspective. Unless you are going to walk over with your ding-dong in your hand, or if you smell like you just crawled out of a dumpster, she’s not going to be put off if you’re just a normal guy.

Even if nothing happens, she’s going to be GLAD that you approached her. She’s going to feel GOOD for having been approached.

So ditch the “accept-reject” continuum. Think if it as giving her the gift of opportunity.

To make it even easier, check this out:

Frame Control

Do You Have Trouble Speaking Up?

Speak With Confidence

Let Loose Your Brilliance

A common fear or anxiety is speaking up with an idea.

You’ve got this great idea, but when it comes time to express it, it doesn’t always come out the way you’d imagined.

Maybe you imagined your friends or that special someone responding a certain way. Positive, open, glad. But then when you start to deliver your message, the result is less than you’d hoped.

The tricky thing about comparing our expectations of reality to reality itself is that our brains are MUCH faster than the way things really play out.

It only takes a fraction of a second to imagine a good outcome. But once you start talking, and you feel all eyes are upon you, it can seem like forever. It doesn’t take long for that little voice inside to say something like, “See what happens when you open your big mouth?”

But here’s the thing. Most of the time, during the “unfolding of reality,” when all those eyes are upon you, they’re not really judging you or rejecting you. They’re just processing your message. They’re taking whatever you’re saying, and comparing it to whatever their experience is.

Even if the BEST case scenario happens (when they realize your idea is FANTASTIC), it won’t happen immediately. They’ll STILL have to digest it, think about it, compare it to their own ideas on the subject, BEFORE they realize what a good idea it is.

If you’re the slightest bit unsure of yourself, the time between the start of your message, and when they finally accept and acknowledge it will seem like a long, long time.

And whenever we’re in a situation like that, our uncertainties tend to EXPLODE in our brains, making huge mountains out of tiny molehills.

The truth is that most people (including YOU!) have some good ideas. Great ideas. Fantastic ideas.

It’s only that when we deliver them, we are less than confident.

And here’s something REALLY important to understand. If you ever DO get rejected (which happens to everybody all the time) they aren’t rejecting your idea, or even you. They’re rejecting your DELIVERY.

Which is really your own INTERPRETATION of your own idea, in the face of imagined scrutiny.

The first clue people look to whenever you speak is not the content of your message. It’s how you deliver it. It’s your confidence, your facial expressions, your body language and your voice tone.

The secret is that if YOU believe your idea or suggestion is valid and true, and you deliver it like it is, everybody else will jump right on board without a second thought.

Learn How:

Frame Control

How To Overcome Her Tests And Increase Attraction

Secrets Of Being A Verbal Ninja

Verbal Ninja Skills Are Crucial

One of the most powerful skills you can have is verbal flexibility.

Any goof can memorize a bunch of pick up lines and patterns. But a true natural will take ANYTHING she gives him, and can flip it around to mean pretty much anything else.

Imagine a fighter who only knows one punch, or a football team who only knows how to run up the middle.

They run into any opponent that can defeat that one move, and they’re done.

On the other hand, any team that can easily adjust their offense based on the defense of their opponent will win every game they plan.

Of course, this is a HORRIBLE metaphor for meeting girls. 

Why?

In sports, both teams can’t win. One team can ONLY win if the make the other team lose.

This absolutely the wrong attitude to have when meeting girls.

Unless you’re the type of guy who sneaks up behind girls and starts talking to them completely unexpectedly, she WANTS you to succeed.

If she’s NOT giving you obvious signs she wants you to go away, she WANTS you to keep going. She WANTS you to seduce her. She WANTS you to bang her silly.

Now, not the way you think. She doesn’t really know you yet. But she HOPES that you are the guy she’s been looking for, who will know how to spin all her propellers.

But in order to figure out if you’re THAT guy or not, she needs to TEST you.

Most guys are terrified of this.

You should absolutely WELCOME tests.

Why?

There are two ways for a girl to get to know a guy enough to know she wants to slip in between the sheets.

One is to go on a several dates, see him operate in various situations, see how he interacts with all levels of society, see how he handles himself under pressure.

This is pretty much the whole reason for the dating process. Most guys know right off the bat if they like a girl, since our criteria are pretty much based on her physical appearance.

But girls based their attraction on behavior. 

Now, this is all unconscious. It’s not like they have a spreadsheet with a bunch of qualities they tick off every time they finish a date.

But they need to interact with a guy for a while before they KNOW they are attracted.

UNLESS, of course, they throw out some tests.

Most guys assume that tests mean she’s mean, or wants to hurt you, or is trying to chase you away.

But in reality, when she tests you, her cave girl brain is trying to ACCELERATE the attraction process.

She wants you to pass, so she can be attracted to you.

How do you pass? 

Have the verbal flexibility and sense of humor to see they are no big deal.

Like sparring with a five year old. They are trying to hit you in the nuts. But you just playfully knock their punches away, and have fun while doing it.

See tests the same way. With a solid sense of self, some strong frame control and verbal flexibility, her tests will be a welcome acceleration to your bedroom.

Learn More:

Frame Control