Category Archives: Influence

How To Float Through Life Without Resistance

People who take the time to improve their skills generally do much better in life than those who don’t.

Sure, some people get lucky, and somehow stumble their way to love or riches, but for the most part, people who have achieved greatness in their lives do so simply because they made a decision to do so.

And they stuck with it, no matter what. There’s all kinds of stories and anecdotes, most of which you’ve likely heard, that support this. Every successful business has three or four failures behind it, you’ve gotta get through ten “no’s” before you get to that all important, “yes,” etc.

The idea of “keeping your eye on the prize” has been around for a long, long time. The reason is that this statement is true (keep your eyes on the prize) both literally and metaphorically.

If you’re running a race, for example, you’d be much better of starting directly at the finish line that your competitors.

If you’ve got a big goal in life, it’s MUCH easier if you focus on that big fat juicy goal than all the little problems that WILL come up from time to time.

If you look at those tiny problems in light of the massive accomplishment your life is becoming, they’ll be small blips. But if you lose sight of your purpose, and stare at those little bumps in the road, they’ll likely morph into giant mountains of doom.

Kind of like when I went parachuting for the first time. The guy told me, right before I jumped out, “Don’t look down!” But he also described WHY I shouldn’t look down. 

Not because it was scary or anything, but he said that when people tend to look down, they “fixate” on something down below, and miss the wonderful experience of just “floating” in mid-air, which is what it feels like when you reach “terminal velocity.”

And that “floating” feeling something that I completely didn’t expect. Nothing I’ve ever experienced comes close.

Well, almost nothing. The truth is that we all tend to move through life and “forget” about who we are and who’s around us.

The only thing that compares to that wonderful “floating” feeling (besides sex, anyway) is when you get into a conversation with somebody, and it’s just a free flowing exchange of wonderful ideas, each one building up the last, into a self sustaining loop of wonderful creativity and discovery.

Most people rarely experience this, but with the right language technology, you can literally generate that feeling at will.

Turn On Your Natural Charisma

What makes somebody charismatic?

You know, the kind of person who walks into a room, and all heads turn. The kind of person who slowly checks out the people, and all the people are thinking the same thing:

“I hope they come and talk to me!”

Most people assume this is purely based on looks. Certainly, if an ultra hot guy or girl walked into a room, they would have this effect.

But this is something much deeper than that. This has to do with incredibly magnetic personal energy that people are drawn to, on a very basic unconscious level, that goes WAY beyond looks or physical appearance.

In fact, even if somebody isn’t otherwise attractive, but they have this magnetic quality, people will be MUCH more interested in them than some brainless beauty (guy or girl).

How can you get that quality?

On a deep level, it’s how you view yourself, and the world around you. 

Most people are worried what people will think about them, and all their thoughts, behaviors, and even micro-movements are designed to elicit that desperately needed approval and validation.

The first step is to get rid of that need for validation and approval from others. But that’s only half the battle. If you only did that, you wouldn’t care what people thought about you, but you wouldn’t much care about other people as well.

That’s why the second piece of the puzzle is crucial. And that is to simply realize that within other people, is treasure.

Wonderful treasure that will take somebody like you to carefully elicit and magnify.

This will change your energy on such a deep and fundamental level that it doesn’t matter WHAT you look like, what kind of clothes you wear, or any of that other “surface level” stuff.

They’ll just notice that YOUR energy is much different than anybody else’s.

You feel comfortable in your own skin, you totally accept and appreciate yourself, and you are genuinely interested in them.

And when they hear the language you use, and how you structure your communication, they will be completely and absolutely transfixed.

In you.

Secrets Of A High Quality Male

Most guys spend all their time trying to “impress” girls.

As if she’s sitting back on her throne, and only needs to wait for ten or twenty guys to approach her, and “apply for the position” to be her boyfriend, or even maybe-boyfriend, or even to get on her “list” of guys she’s thinking about dating.

To be sure, it’s easy for a girl to develop this attitude, given the desperation of most guys.

But consider this “structure” in a context different from dating and sexual relationships.

Imagine some girl is hungry. (NOT interested in sex or romance or relationships). She’s at some kind of food court. There’s a line of guys with various dishes that are average, at best.

And because each guy hasn’t made a sale in a while, they are desperate to sell her some food.

So the line up, and all give her their best “pitch” knowing she’s only going to choose one of these average dishes.

She looks  at all of them, and because they are all about the same, she kind of enjoys the fact that all these poor guys are trying to sell her something.

But then she smells something fantastic. Some guy in the back, in his own shop, cooking up something that smells ten times better than what these chumps have.

Only this guy isn’t standing in line. Because he KNOWS that what he’s got is ten times better than any of those fools, which means he can CHARGE ten times more than any of these fools.

So he just hangs back, and waits for HIGH QUALITY customers that appreciate what he’s got. He doesn’t waste his time on low quality customers who enjoy being pitched to by average sellers.

Because he’s only got limited ingredients, he won’t sell them to just anybody. He sells them ONLY to people who make an effort to come to his shop, and pay his asking price. Which is MUCH MORE than those other chumps.

And guess what? This guy, the one with the QUALITY STUFF, makes ten times more than anybody else.

In the game of seduction, it’s the exact same thing.

As  high quality male, you don’t need to get in line with all other fools.

Because you’ve got the quality ingredients, you can let quality girls come to you.

What kind of quality?

Your powerful language that stirs feelings in her that she simply CANNOT feel with those other guys.

The deep language of sexual persuasion that girls NEVER experience.

Which is why once they hear it from you, they’ll won’t be able to settle for average again.

How To Leverage Her Desires For Incredible Attraction

One of the easiest ways to get a girl interested in you is to use her own naturally occurring desires.

Every human has a huge collection of unmet wants and needs. As soon a we achieve something, it’s not long before we want something else.

Nothing wrong with this, it’s just human nature.

Some of these things are simple, like getting something to eat or drink.

Some of these are much deeper and more powerful, like expressing your true self, and getting that deep feeling of accomplishment.

Whenever we look out into the world, we do so through a set of filters. How we see the world, and interpret it will be HUGELY influenced by these filters.

Most people don’t even know they exist, let alone understand how we can not only adjust our own, but how to covertly adjust the filters of others.

Advertisers have known this for centuries. You put an attractive girl next to a product, any product, and she’s going to evoke feelings, sometimes unconscious, of sexual desire.

We then see that product through that filter of sexual desire, making it much more attractive, no matter what it is.

If you can get a girl looking at you through similar filters (not necessarily sexual desire), she’ll have a hard time NOT being attracted to you.

What kind of filters?

Anything that has to do with those deep desires that we all have. Feelings of excitement, hope, wonder, joy, deep emotional pleasure, dreams for the future.

The secret is that these are pretty easy to elicit. All you’ve got to do is establish a base level of rapport (which is pretty easy and automatic, since humans are “pack animals”), and you’re good to go.

Just ask the right questions, follow up questions, and leverage those things that she wants.

Truth is, when you talk about HER deep desires, wants and dreams, you really won’t have to talk about yourself at all.

Learn to do this, and you can literally create attraction in pretty much any girl you meet.

How To Blissfully Trance Out And Hypnotize Others With Your Message

I love a good feedback loop.

The Beatles were the first group to actually use a feedback loop as part of their song, at the beginning.

If you are in a good mood, you’ll generally behave in ways that will invite positive responses from others, thereby enhancing your good mood.

On the other hand, if you are in a bad mood, the same thing generally happens. You scowl at people, they scowl right back, and your mood worsens.

It’s like that line from the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie, where the girl looks at the ghost and says, “I don’t believe in ghost stories!” to which the ghost replies, “Ya best believe in ’em, cause you’re IN ONE!”

When we’re in our own feedback loops, it’s pretty hard to tell. It’s easy to blame the world, and not look to ourselves as the driver of our own feelings.

What’s even better than noticing and enhancing your own feedback loops is creating them in others.

You know the old saying, “A picture is worth a thousand words,” right?

Basically it means that a good photo or painting will inspire much deeper emotions and understanding than any amount of random verbosity.

But what happens when you create a word-picture feedback loop?

What happens when you talk to people in a way that will get them generating their own pictures, in their own minds, in their own way?

Not only will they fully embrace their pictures (creates with YOUR words) but they’ll give them MUCH BETTER feelings than any picture taken or created by somebody else.

And when you carefully pay attention to what they say, how they speak, and their body language while feeding them even BETTER words, to help them create even BETTER pictures, they’ll literally fall into a self-generated bliss trance right on the spot.

Needless to say, this is a pretty good party trick. 

Or you could use it for other things.

How To Create Congruence

The power of congruence is often misunderstood, or not even realized by many.

Sometimes we feel like everything’s easy, and other times it just feels like everything we do is doomed to failure. Sometimes we get all green lights, other times it seems we can’t help but to get stuck in traffic.

The deep feeling of congruence, when everything just effortlessly “flows” is pretty cool. Everything just “clicks” in the right way, and stuff happens without any effort or scarcely any conscious thought.

Even simple things like going to see a show with your friends are ten times more enjoyable when everything just automatically falls into place. You get the best parking spot, you show up and get the perfect seats. You get up to buy some popcorn and nobody’s in line so it only takes a couple seconds.

Congruence is even better when it’s happens spontaneously between people. Either somebody you’ve just met or an old friend.

Once I was in an airport bar, waiting for my boarding call. I had about two hours, and I hadn’t brought anything to read. Then I saw some girl reading a book that I’d read. She noticed I was looking at her book, and we started a conversation. Turns out we both had loads in common, and the two hours seemed to pass in a few minutes.  One thing just let to another, conversationally speaking, and before I knew it I heard my boarding call. Easy, effortless and enjoyable.

Most of the time this happens spontaneously, but it can be created. But if we wait for conversational congruence to happen spontaneously, we’ll be missing out on a LOT.

Because once you open yourself up to all the potential, you’ll literally find opportunities everywhere you go.

Doesn’t matter if you’re selling something, looking to make a friend, or just want pass the time with an enjoyable conversation.

When you understand the structure of language, and how to let the other person’s criteria lead the conversation, you’ll find it easy to make friends wherever you go.