Most guys know, at least instinctively, that in order to create attraction, real attraction, in a woman, you’ve got to lead her. But beyond that, it’s kind of fuzzy.

If you go too far, you come across as some insecure, knuckle dragging psycho who most girls normal girls don’t want anything to with.

Not far enough, and you come across as a pushover, like most guys today.

What does “lead her” even mean, any way? It could mean to physically lead her across the room. It could mean lead the conversation. But what happens when she tries to go her own way, as most normal people do? Sure, must guys think they’d like some super obedient girl who would eagerly follow all their orders.

But if you actually met a girl like this, you’d be turned off in a hurry. She would seem like she’s escaped from the nut house, just after receiving her daily injection of whatever drugs they give people in those places to keep them passive.

So no matter HOW you are going to lead her, she’s going to resist. She HAS to resist. The more she resists, the  more you can prove to her how strong you are.

How do you do this? One way to NOT do this is to get angry, either at her, yourself, or the world. It’s not HER job to follow you. It’s your job to lead her.

Another way to NOT do this is to collapse in a puddle of hurt feelings and close down.

Another way to NOT do this is to give up completely, and let her lead.

Believe it or not, girls don’t really like a guy much who NEVER leads, and ALWAYS defers to them. It may make them look good to their friends, and it make not create stress, but it won’t create any attraction.

So, how DO you lead? Well, you first need to go where you’re going. This means you’ve got to have an intention for the particular girl you’re talking to.

Now, this can get confusing. As I’m sure you’ve heard, you need to be “outcome independent” when talking to a girl.

This means you shouldn’t choose an outcome that REQUIRES her compliance, BEFORE you meet her.

But you still need an intention.

It’s kind of like goal setting. When you set goals, you need to make sure they are under your control. If you’re goal depends on other people doing things, you’re going to run into trouble.

But you STILL need to have a intention when talking to her.

It could be to find out if she’s interested in you. It could be to ASK for her number, not necessarily get it.

It could be to try kino three times within ten minutes, NOT to get a certain response from her.

So long as you’ve got an intention, that is based on YOUR actions, you’re doing pretty good.

Stick to them, and you’ll be doing better than most guys.

mindpersuasion.com