Monthly Archives: May 2015

Always Let Her See The Real You

Don't Be Shy!

Share Your Truth From The Get Go

Most everything in life belongs on some kind of spectrum.

There’re generally two extremes, and most things take place with a mix of both.

Take something as simple as exercise, for example. Some people are way over on one side. They spend hours a day in the gym, are super careful about what they eat, and act like Superman around kryptonite if somebody offers them a doughnut.

On the other side, there are those that act as if any form of elevated heart rate will end in certain death. There could be a room filled with ready to go porn stars on the second floor, but if the elevator is broken, they’ll give it a pass.

How you behave around women is also on a continuum. There’s the super alpha aggressive side, where she must ALWAYS follow your lead no matter what. Then there’s the other side, when you only do what she allows you to do.

Some guys will talk to a girl, and “test” to see if she’s following them or not. They’ll talk to her for a couple minutes, and then move three feet down the far. If she follows him, she passes. If she doesn’t, he forgets her and moves on to somebody else.

Then there’re guys who do the opposite. They walk up and ask if it’s OK to talk to them. Then they ask if it’s OK to buy them a drink. They even ask if it’s OK to ask for her number.

Sure, both ends of the spectrum will get you a certain type of girl. 

But consider this, the type of girl you get, will ALWAYS expect you to act like that.

Which means if that’s not the real you, you’re going to be in serious trouble.

Now, consider a guy who’s pretty in control of his life, outside of dating. But when he talks to girls, he’s the type to always ask for permission.

There’s going to come a point where he starts to feel comfortable around her, and doesn’t need to ask for her permission any more.

But when she first met him, ALL SHE KNOWS about him is he always asks for permission. That might even be one of the  main reason she liked him in the first place. Maybe she likes guys who “know their place” or something.

Later on, this guy is going to be miserable.

Same goes with the other guy. If he’s trying on some “alpha-persona” he’s going to attract the type of girl who ALWAYS needs to be told what to do.

Unless he’s comfortable with that, there’re going to be problems later on.

How do you solve this dilemma?

Simple!

When you first talk to her, behave like you normally behave. Around your buddies, coworkers etc.

Let her know the real you from the get go.

Sure, she might not like the real you. But so what? Your job is to find the girls that do.

And then simply pick the best one.

Get Started:

Girlfriend Generator

Nonsensical Physics 

Leverage The Unseen

Mysteries Of Science

When I was a kid used to LOVE quantum physics.

Well, at least the concepts. I’d read a bunch of books where they’d taken out the math, so to make it more accessible to everyday guys like me.

Now, from an ultra “meta” standpoint, everything makes sense. Everything is governed by laws and principles.

But from a human standpoint, only a small sliver of a sliver makes any rational sense.

There’s plenty of psychological tests to prove this.

They take a logical puzzle, put it in non-familiar terms (like cards and shapes and colors) and most people fail miserably.

They take the same logical puzzle, put it in a familiar social setting, and everybody gets it. Easy peasy.

Same goes with simple math. Two plus two is four. Two times four is eight.

But start talking about economics, especially when you get into what some economists called the “unseen,” then things get crazy.

One of the most mind numbing aspect of quantum physics was Heisenberg’s Principle of Uncertainty.

He mathematically showed that ultra tiny systems behave in different ways when they are being observed, and when they aren’t being observed.

This is assuming there’s no interaction between the observer and that which is observed.

Why this happens, nobody really knows.

Another thing that blows people’s minds is the derivation of the Ideal Gas Law.

(The what of what??)

You know how when you pop a balloon, it makes a big sound, right? Or if you poked a hole in an inflated tire, all the air would quickly rush out, right?

Why does that happen?

Most of us assume it’s because all those air molecules are in there, crammed so tightly together they can’t stand each other, and can’t wait to get away from each other, right?

Makes perfect sense, but it’s wrong.

There’s a certain equation that describes EXACTLY how much pressure is inside, based on the temperature, etc. And exactly how fast the gas escapes when there’s a hole, etc. And precisely how quickly a balloon will deflate when popped, etc.

So it’s clear this equation is pretty on the money, right?

But here’s the thing. That equation is based on this assumption that DOES NOT MAKE SENSE.

What’s that?

That every single particle of air in there (the balloon, the tire, etc) THINKS that it is all alone.

That equation is based on the assumption that there is ZERO interaction between particles in there.

Which means there must be some OTHER explanation why they all rush out so fast.

Maybe the universe has some deeper laws, that NOBODY understands.

And all we can ever see is what’s on the surface.

Kind of like you.

Most people you interact with only see the OUTSIDE. The very outer layer of what you present.

Inside, you know there is much, much more.

Are you ready to discover it?

Secrets Of Social Success

Look For Treasure In Others

Learn To Appreciate Others

Through the study of genetics, scientists have concluded that throughout history, a few of the guys have gotten most of the girls.

And studying primitive societies that still live according to the hunter-gatherer lifestyle, this holds to be true.

The guys at the top of the social ladder tend to get a lot more girls than the guys down at the bottom. So it stands to reason, if you want to become better with the ladies, it will help to move up the social ladder.

How do you do that?

Well, if you happen to be a member of the Yanomamo tribe in the rainforests of Brazil, this would mean killing more dudes than everybody else. It seems in that particular society, there is a strong correlation with your kill rate and your success rate with the ladies.

Luckily, that doesn’t hold true for most of us!

So, assuming you don’t want to go out there and become a serial killer, how do you become more like those guys at the top of the social heap?

One way is to become more verbally fluent. Contrary to Hollywood, the alpha male is not the strong silent type who grunts and kills bad guys. In real life, the alpha is the guy who can talk a good game.

And I’m not talking about “game” like using seductive language patterns. I’m talking about general social skills. The kind that makes people want to listen to you. The kind that doesn’t sound like some laser targeted set of patterns with a specific outcome.

The kind that you can use with anybody, and leave them feeling better after you’ve finished speaking with them.

Dale Carnegie talked about this in his famous book, “How To Win Friends and Influence People.” There is a whole set of strategies to follow that will help.

But they can all be boiled down to a simple rule:

Become Interested In Others

Most people don’t do this. Most people walk around desperate for attention, desperate for validation, desperation for approval. They get into a conversation with somebody and all they talk about is themselves.

But if you cultivate a genuine interest in others, and the social confidence to find out about them, AND make them comfortable enough talking to you that they feel comfortable sharing themselves with you, you will be astonished.

This simple technique will do more for you girl getting skills than anything else. All you’ve got to do is just start talking to people, and hold one though in mind while doing so:

“I wonder what’s unique and interesting about this person?”

Do this, and wonderful things will happen.

What Happens When People Start Yelling?

It's Not You It's Them

It’s Not You, It’s Them

Most people have heard of the “Pareto Principle,” or as it’s more often called, the 80/20 rule.

In any kind of distribution, 20% of the stuff is doing 80% of the action.

If you’ve got a large sales force, 20% of the salespeople are making 80% of the sales.

If you’ve got a hundred shirts, you wear 20% of them 80% of the time.

This also comes into play when we’re talking to strangers. One huge fear that most people have is getting rejected.

So when we’ve got some idea or even a desire to simply get out there and express ourselves, we hold back because of what we fear.

But as you know, most of our fears never come true.

So what’s going to happen when we actually get out there and start talking to people (for whatever reason)?

That familiar 80/20 rule is going to kick in.

80% of the people we talk to won’t budge one way or the other. They won’t hate us, they won’t love us.

They won’t disagree with us, they won’t agree with us.

And within that twenty percent, ten will absolutely fall in love with us and our ideas, and the other ten will act like we’ve committed the gravest sin even in looking at them.

A long time ago, I used to sell cars. This young couple came in, and wanted to buy a car, but we didn’t have the right color. I told them I’d order it for them, and call them when it came in.

Only when they wrote their number down, I couldn’t read the last two digits. So I just started with 01 and worked my way up to 99 (at least that was the plan). 

I was shocked to find out that one in ten (that ten percent) were very angry that I’d called their home. I wasn’t trying to sell them anything. I just was asking for a specific person. 

Most people said, “Sorry, wrong number.” and I said, “Oops.” and that was that.

But one in ten got really angry.

At first, it made me a little intimidated. But after a couple people started yelling at me, it started to become kind of funny. 

Now, I’m not saying you should go out and hassle people on the street just to have a few laughs, but it is pretty interesting how tightly wound up people are.

And after the third or fourth person started into their tirade, I didn’t feel it was me at all. I KNEW they were yelling at me for their own reasons.

After all, how could they possibly be angry at me, when all I said was, “Hi is Robert there?”

Think about this next time you’re thinking about interacting with strangers. One, all your fears are false. Two, the people that do give you grief, is on them, not you.

To make it even easier, check this out:

Should You Change To Get A Girlfriend?

Should You Change or Be Yourself?

Is It Really OK To Be Yourself?

I saw this really horrible movie on Netflix a couple months ago.

This girl met this guy at college. They started dating, and she started to slowly suggest he make changes. At first it was his clothes. Then it was the music he listened to. Then the kind of food he ate. All his friends thought it was just another case of a guy doing ANYTHING to NOT lose his girl.

It happens, but this was a pretty extreme case.

But then it got REALLY extreme. She convinced him to have plastic surgery. Some kind of nose job. Then his friends REALLY thought he was nuts. Like call the guys in the white suits to take him away nuts.

As it turned out, it was even worse. She was doing all this for an art project. And he was the canvas. When he realized that she was doing all of this just to show her art class how “powerful” and “manipulative” she was, he was devastated.

All along, she didn’t really care for him. 

Now, I’m sure you’ve never gone to this extreme, but something happens to a guy when he’s with a girl, or about to be with a girl.

Guys will do ANYTHING if they think it will help them get laid. Anything except what they should do.

Which is simply get into the habit of talking to people. Becoming outgoing and social. Talking to cute girls just because it’s fun to talk to cute girls. If they are interesting enough to take it further, take if further.

If not, no big deal. 

Now, this may seem like an impossible task, especially if you have very little experience. But the more experience you get, the easier this will be.

Start small. Take your time. Start with harmless flirting. Then start saying “hello.” After that, start conversations.

Once you get to a certain point, you’ll come to a realization. A very powerful, and very freeing realization.

You don’t have to change for anybody.

Just the way you are, right now as you read this, there’s likely plenty of girls out there who would be happy to be with you.

(This, of course, assumes you shower regularly and don’t sleep in dumpsters covered in vomit every night.)

It’s not a matter of changing to meet that “one” girl.

It’s a matter of finding that “one” girl.

The more girls you talk to, the easier it will be to find her.

Get Started:

Girlfriend Generator

Are You Resisting The Flow of Life?

Open To The Flow Of Life

Open Up

In physics, there’re many different kinds of equilibrium.

The term equilibrium itself can mean many different things in many different instances.

But it basically means “balance.”

When I was in high school, I was on the track team as a pole-vaulter. Me and the other pole vaulters would goof around and see if we could balance the poles on our chins.

Interestingly enough, the longer the pole, the easier it is to balance, up to a certain point.

For example, take a pencil, and try to balance it in your hand. Not so easy.

But take a broom, and it’s a lot easier.

But if you took a piece of wood that was fifty meters long, it would be pretty impossible.

No matter what you’re doing in life, balance is always a key component.

Playing music, for example, requires you balance the time with musical notes and the silence in between.

Working a job requires you balance doing the part you like doing, with the part you need to do.

In the beginning of a relationship, you’ve got to balance the time you spend with your partner with the time you spend alone.

In any case, too much of one thing, at the expense of something else is pretty dangerous. Things get out of whack, and nature will eventually correct itself, with or without your permission.

In physics, there are two broad types of equilibrium, or balance. Stable and unstable.

Stable equilibrium is when you’ve got a small ball, for example, resting comfortably in the bottom of a big round glass. All the forces are equal, and unless you apply some pretty concentrated force, that ball’s not going anywhere.

On the other hand, you could have a ball balanced on the top of a seal’s nose. The slightest push, or even shift in wind (or the seal’s attitude) will send the ball to another location.

Many of us wish that life would be filled with “stable equilibrium” situations. Where everything’s set and we don’t have to do much.

Unfortunately, the world around us doesn’t always cooperate. Situations are always changing, people are always changing.

They may change slowly, but they change.

This is precisely what they mean when they say, “Stay on top of things.” There you are, balanced right on the tip (like a ball on a seal’s nose) and everything keeps shifting. So you’ve literally and metaphorically got to “stay on top of things.”

Life is one big flowing and unfolding of situations, events, mysteries and secrets.

Just like a river, you could fight the current, hang on to something and hope you don’t drown, or simply embrace the ever changing nature of reality.

Because when you swim with the current, you can get going pretty fast, and get to some pretty interesting places.

Release resistance, and embrace the flow of life.

How To Avoid Getting Dumped

Shoot Only At Pre-Painted Targets

Shoot Only At Painted Targets

Many people paint the target around an arrow after they shoot it.

This, of course, is a metaphor, so let’s dig a little bit deeper. If you shoot at a target, one that’s already painted, you might miss.

But if you shoot at a blank piece of wood, and THEN paint the target around it, you can claim you’re some kind of super ninja archer.

Only if people see you doing this, they’ll know you’re a fraud.

And if you do this a lot, you might get into trouble. You might start to BELIEVE you are a super ninja archer. But in reality you’re shooting arrows willy-nilly all over the place. Which means you’ll eventually shoot one somewhere that might get you into trouble.

How does this translate to the dating game? Most guys have ZERO consciously determined criteria. All they know is they want a hot girl that won’t throw a drink in their face or kick them in the nuts when they ask for a number.

If she dates him, “lets” him sleep with her, he’s on cloud nine. This is when he starts “painting the target around the arrow.”

Since all he knows about her is that she’s hot and she’s “letting him” access the holiest of holies, he starts to “imagine” that she’s the ideal woman. He’ll reverse engineer his own belief system to match hers, so he won’t have to face a cold harsh truth:

They most likely have NOTHING in common.

This is why when the early excitement wears off, they can’t stand each other. Usually this happens to one partner before the other, and somebody gets dumped.

And they spend the next year and potentially thousands of dollars trying to “get their ex back.”

How can you avoid such a common occurrence?

Easy.

Simply choose criteria consciously, and make sure she matches that criteria BEFORE you get physical.

Because when you get physical, your deeply programmed caveman will take over and convince your conscious mind that she’s PERFECT.

Take some time to develop some criteria. Stuff about her personality. Her intelligence. Her habits. Her beliefs.

Sure, you’ll get laid a LOT less.

But when you do, it will be with somebody who has a LOT in common with you.

Which means it will be much more likely to turn into a relationship that’s got a LOT MORE going on than pure physical fun.

Get Started:

Girlfriend Generator

How To Communicate With Super Conscious Mind

Tap Into The Global Brain

The Deep Connection Within

What’s the difference between the conscious mind, the unconscious and the super conscious?

It’s a common question, and there really isn’t a specific answer.

It’s not like a math equation, where there is only one answer that everybody pretty much accepts.

The conscious and unconscious is pretty straightforward.

Your conscious mind is the part of you that is aware of what is going on right here, right now.

The thoughts in your mind as you read this sentence. The feelings in your body as you feel the surface you are now resting on. The memories of what you ate last.

The unconscious is everything else.

A good comparison between the size of the two is a field about ten miles on each side. That’s one hundred square miles. That’s everything that’s in your brain.

If your brain is a field of one hundred square miles, then your conscious mind, the part that you are aware of at any given moment, the size of a beam of light coming from a small flashlight.

Imagine you were stumbling around in the dark, on that large field, with a flashlight, looking for something.

Luckily, the subconscious, or unconscious doesn’t just sit there and wait for our conscious to finally come across what we’re looking for.

There’s plenty of interaction between the two. The more relaxed and open you are, the more quickly your subconscious can present you with the information you need.

It’s kind of like you’re wearing a magic harness, and when you think of what you need, you suddenly move just over the spot on this metaphorical field where the information is.

So, what’s the super conscious?

If  your conscious is a flashlight, and your unconscious is a one hundred square mile field, think of the super conscious as the entire Earth.

And on top of which, is everybody else’s field, all laid out.

The super conscious can be thought of as the collective of all the minds that exist, not just now, but in the past, and the future.

Think of several Earth’s all representing different points in time, all with people with their own plot of “mind.” 

Not only are all the fields connected (through the deep Earth below) but all the different Earth’s are connected as well.

Now, this is a metaphor, not reality. As they say in NLP, The “Map” is Not The Territory. The metaphor is not that which it describes, only a way to understand it.

So, in the metaphor, how do you connect to the super conscious?

Just like you connect to the subconscious, only more so.

The more relaxed and calm you are, the easier you’ll drift just over the spot of mind you need to find.

And in the case of the super conscious, it’s not only about finding the right spot of mind (or the specific information from your unconscious) but how to interpret that.

If you are quiet enough, and patient enough, you’ll find not only deep wisdom within yourself, but ultimate truth as well.

Get Started:

Kundalini Activator