Category Archives: Believe

Get Rid Of Approach Anxiety By Becoming The Sorter

They Pass Your Tests - Not The Other Way Around

See Beneath The Surface

Most guys are incredibly nervous when they approach girls. In fact, it can take years of practice to fully get over this.

And even guys who DO get over this, once they’re off the market for a while, their skills will go back to zero.

If you’ve ever been in a relationship for a while and then suddenly tried the market, you may have felt WAY out of your league.

Why is this?

One of the reasons is all of the assumptions that guys make about girls. Since guys are hard wired to be attracted primarily to looks, we assume that if she’s cute, then every other part of her is good also.

Which means when we walk over there, we assume that SHE already passes our “tests” and it’s completely up to us to pass her tests.

This is enough to give ANYBODY the jitters, no matter WHAT it is your doing.

Luckily, the part about her looks being “good enough” is absolutely false.

And here’s a way to prove it to yourself, AND get over your approach anxiety faster than you ever could just by pushing through them.

This will take some time, but you’ll be gaining an EXTRAORDINARY amount of experience, AND decreasing your levels of anxiety significantly.

Here’s what you do.

First, come up with some deal breakers. Either pure red flags, (according to you, nobody else) or things you’d rather she didn’t have.

This must be personality traits, habits, beliefs, things that will take a little bit of conversation to get to.

Smoking, a certain religion or political affiliation, cat person (or dog person) anything that you don’t imagine your “Dream Girl” of having.

Then, simply talk to girls LONG ENOUGH to disqualify them. Don’t get ANY numbers.

After you go through ten or twenty girls, you’ll have a sudden burst of realization.

That there’s MUCH more to girls than just their looks.

And that will absolutely DESTROY any feelings of “she’s perfect and I must qualify myself to her.”

ALL without getting any rejection.

Now, it’s important to have a friendly attitude while doing this. Don’t get angry, don’t put them down (out loud or in your mind). Just talk to them long enough until you get a red flag.

Then simply disqualify them IN YOUR MIND, politely end the conversation, and walk away.

Once you leave the mindset of the desperate beggar, and enter the mindset of the sorter, it will get much, much easier.

This Will Help:

mindpersuasion.com

Take Your Brain on a Shopping Spree

Grab Whatever You Want

Take Anything You Want

Here’s a fun mind experiment.

You are at your favorite shopping mall. (Or department store, or supermarket or whatever).

You’ve got a shopping cart, and five minutes.

You can go to any store, and grab anything you want, and put it in your basket, for free.

No limitations.

What would you grab? Assuming you can’t sell anything, so you don’t just grab the most expensive stuff, what would you get?

This is a fun experiment to play with your friends, just to see what kinds of things they value.

But it’s also a good metaphor for the way we look at the world.

How so?

Our senses are being hit with millions of bits of information per second, but our conscious minds only handle a small fraction. Less than a hundred bits.

The stuff that’s important to us, like our names, money on the ground, a tiger that just escaped from the zoo, that stuff gets front row seats in our conscious minds.

The rest?

Straight into long term storage, most likely to never been seen again.

What kinds of things?

Those attractive people who are checking you out.

Those people that would be perfect for you to talk to and get some traction behind that idea of yours.

That bookstore or magazine stand that’s got the book or article that might send your career into a completely different direction, allowing you to make more money than you ever thought possible.

The trouble is that most of us never notice ANY of those things.

But it’s easy to “fine-tune” your mind, to see whatever you want to see.

Even better, you can create any set of ideas or beliefs you want, and train your mind to see PROOF of whatever you want.

Most people say they’ll believe it when they see it.

But as I’m sure you know, you’ve got to believe it FIRST, then you’ll start seeing it.

Granted, it’s not quick. It’s not as simple as mumbling some magic phrases.

But it is very easy. And it only takes a few minutes a day of private mental practice.

What would YOU like to believe?

The world really IS like that imaginary shopping mall with all the stuff.

You really CAN grab whatever you want.

Tune your brain, and it’s yours for the taking.

Learn How:

Belief Change

How To Benefit From Einstein’s Error

Einstein Was Wrong Quite A Lot

Copy The Smartest Guys On Earth

If it rains, is that a good thing or a bad thing?

If you’re intending to play baseball, maybe not so good.

If you’re growing crops, then it’s probably a good thing.

If you apply for a job and don’t get it, is that a good thing, or a bad thing?

Bad thing if the company takes off and everybody gets rich off the stock options.

Good thing if the company sucks and they end up laying everybody off.

The bottom line about pretty much anything is that the meaning is not only open to interpretation, but many people will have different interpretations.

And they’ll all be right.

Even though the world exists with or without us, how we perceive it, and how we perceive ourselves is always open to interpretation.

This is pretty good because all you’ve got to do is try on different interpretations, and see which one works best.

One of the most mind boggling advances if physics happened just like this.

In the early 1900’s a bunch of the smartest guys on Earth (Einstein and friends) were sitting around trying to figure out this phenomenon called “Black Body Radiation.”

They kept watching what was happening, and then describe it mathematically and they kept getting it wrong.

Even Einstein.

Then this guy Max Plank (in his twenties) had an “out of the box” idea, and quantum physics was born.

Luckily, we can apply that very same model. Just keep trying different “stories” of what’s going on, until you find one that fits.

The good news is that you can do this on stuff that’s happening right now, around you, and you can also do this with stuff that’s already happened.

All you’ve got to do is choose something you’d like to be true (like “making money is easy,” or “talking to super sexy people is easy,” or “giving persuasive speeches in front of hundreds of people is easy”) and find evidence of this in your history to support it.

And it will be true.

Truth is there’s billions of stuff going on around you AND there’s billions of stuff that happened to you already.

All you’ve got to do is choose something you’d like to be true, and then find evidence to support it.

No physics required.

Learn more:

Belief

Do You Depend On Imaginary Forces?

Stop Doing This

Take Responsibility

Most of us have common fears and desires.

We’d like more money than we’ve got, and we’d like our relationships to be a little bit better.

Most of us would like to lose a few pounds, and maybe move to a nicer place.

It’s also pretty common to think of these as “out of our control.”

I remember a long time ago I was watching a post game interview of a baseball player whose team had just been eliminated from the playoffs.

What struck me was the lack of responsibility in his language. The words and phrases he was using suggested there was some larger force that kept them from winning.

Now, most professional players don’t talk like this. When they give post game interviews after big losses, they say things like, “WE couldn’t get any hits,” or “WE had trouble getting on the board,” or “OUR defense just fell apart.”

One of the things you’ll learn if you study hypnosis is the things people are hiding underneath their speech. 

Even simple things, like meeting people, can be made to sound out of our control.

For example, when heading out socially, we say things like, “I hope I meet somebody tonight.”

But when you think about it, meeting somebody is TOTALLY under your control. You see somebody interesting, you walk up, you introduce yourself, and you exchange names.

Think about if you talked about eating like this.

“I hope I can find some food.”

Maybe if you live in a cave and you’re going out with your bow and arrow, but not if you live in a modern (or even semi-modern) world with fast food and convenience stores everywhere.

Why are some things easy, and some things hard?

Is meeting people (or getting a better job or making more money) really any different than buying some food?

You want something, and you’ve got to interact with others to get it.

The only real difference is the meaning we put on things.

It’s our perceptions that make them seem difficult, not the things themselves.

Once you change your inner filters and windows through which you interpret the world, it will seem a lot easier.

Learn How:

Belief

Are You Playing it TOO Safe?

Embrace Risk For Massive Success

The Magic Of Balanced Risk

Sometimes being able to unlearn something is more important than learning something.

Often times when we want something we think we can’t get, we imagine that we need to do something that we’re not doing, or learn something that we don’t know, or think something that we’re not thinking.

(huh?)

Sometimes though it’s what we STOP doing that will get us what we want, rather than what we START doing.

As we move from childhood to adulthood, this idea shows up a lot. We stop depending things “outside” of us, and start depending on our own, self-generated actions and decisions.

You stop depending on the training wheels, and start depending on your own sense of balance.

You stop expecting free money in the form of an allowance, and get a part time job.

You stop feeling the need to ask for permission (which also means if you mess up it’s not really your fault) and start trying things out on your own, just to see what will happen.

Now, it’s pretty clear that some people are better at this than others. Some people take to risk and trial and error based behaviors like a duck to water.

Others are terrified of leaving the safety of authority and conformity.

Neither one is “better” than the other, since “better” can only be determined by what you value.

If you’re content to take what you’re given, and happen to be in a situation where you’re given some pretty good stuff, then you’ve got it pretty good.

On the other hand, if you want a lot more than what other people decide to “give you” then you’ll need to take some risks.

A lot of people shy away from that word. They imagine taking a risk, failing, and ending up homeless, or shunned by society.

This can lead to overcompensation. Taking no risks at all. Only playing it safe.

But not all risks have to be huge. Not all risks entail putting your life’s savings on a one time stock tip.

Every time you talk to a stranger, you’re taking a small risk. They might like you, they might ignore you.

Every time you call about an ad for a job, you’re taking a small risk. They might hire you and think you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread, or they may laugh at you and hang up.

If you believe that any risk is dangerous, and even the smallest rejection will destroy your ego, it will.

But if you believe that all risks comes with rewards, either getting what you want, or getting you more information that will help you get what you want, they will.

To feel comfortable with risks, and see opportunities where others fear to tread, check this out:

Belief Change

Do You Like Driving On Dirt Roads Of The Brain?

Super Highways Of The Brain

Take The Easy Way To Happiness

If you were driving across a few hundred kilometers of land, which routes would you take?

Huge, wide, super highways, or small back roads?

Unless you had plenty of time to kill, and wanted to experience local culture, you’d take the highway.

Generally speaking, when we decide to do anything, we take the shortest route possible. This doesn’t have to involve physical movement.

The idea of “killing two birds with one stone” is embedded deep into our psychology for economic reasons. Every calorie we burn must be accounted for on a microbiological level, so our subconscious minds quickly calculate the least amount of energy needed to get what we want.

Sometimes, though, this doesn’t help us.

Just like real roads, our brains are a collection of superhighways and back roads. Whenever thoughts move around our brains, they take the easiest route.

Unfortunately, the routes that lead to fear are HUGE. This is so we stay safe, no matter where we are, and what we are doing.

Long time ago, our brains decided the most important rule, in all cases, was to not get injured.

This worked great in primitive cultures and environments, but not so much anymore.

Now we get tons of “false positives” when our brains think there’s something to be afraid of when there really isn’t.

This is why so many things that SHOULD be easy aren’t. We know what to do, but for some reason we think it’s hard, or we keep putting it off, or we imagine there’s somebody “out there” that is stopping us.

But here’s the deal. When we build up those back roads, in our brains, so that they are BIGGER than those factory programmed, fear-based super highways, taking action, ANY action will seem easy.

The false images of fear will be removed, and getting what we want will be as easy as baking a cake. (At least if you know how to bake a cake!)

How do you do that? How do you build up those positive, “good feeling” paths in the brain so they are the go-to path for your thoughts?

A combination of mental exercises and hypnosis.

These the basic elements of Belief Change.

When you change those back roads into super highways, you’ll truly believe, on a deep level, that getting whatever you want is easy.

Learn More:

Belief Change

What Do You See When You Look “Out There”?

Master Your Own Brain

Master Your Brain

Your brain is an amazing tool, much more than most people realize.

It’s lighting quick, and can hold limitless amounts of information.

As much as people are hyping up science and computers and artificial intelligence, nothing comes close to the computational power between your ears.

One thing that makes it so incredible is its amazing efficiency.

It knows when to conserve resources, and when to go “all in.”

For example, scientists tell us that much of what we “see” out there is really generated “in here.”

Meaning our brain does a quick check of our environment, notices it’s pretty similar to things its seen before, and then calls up it’s “brain cache” or its pre-recorded information.

For example, once I was driving down the freeway, and saw a pickup truck a hundred meters or so ahead. There was a dog in the back.

Then, when I got right up next to it, I looked over, expecting to see a dog, but instead saw a pig. (He was looking right at me with a “what are you looking at” expression).

I almost drove off the road!

What happened was my brain saw a pickup truck with a four legged animal in the back. It decided the accuracy of the situation wasn’t crucial, so it looked in the back of my brain for all my memories of four legged animals in the back of pickup trucks, and came back with a bunch of dogs.

So I saw a dog.

Only it wasn’t a dog, it was a pig.

Now, had the situation been important, and I was actively looking for something (like I needed to find a pig to keep a bomb from destroying the Earth or something) I would have seen the pig straight away.

On the other hand, had I been nearly eaten to death by a gang of hungry pigs as a child, I DEFINITELY would have seen the pig. Not only that, but I would have gotten a HUGE negative emotion because of it that told me to stay the heck away from pigs!

So what we “see” out in the world is HUGELY dependent on what we’ve ALREADY got stored in our brains.

We can see things, events, situations, people, you name it. And depending on how we interacted with those same things before, we can get positive, neutral or negative feelings.

Most people think that once those memories are there, you can’t change them.

Like if you get nervous when talking to attractive people, you may think you’ll simply ALWAYS be nervous talking to attractive people.

But it doesn’t have to be that way.

All you’ve got to do is change how you access your memories.

Notice what filters your brain is putting up between you, and the world.

And change them.

Learn how:

Belief Change

Why Thinking Makes It So

The Power Of Positive Beliefs

You’ll See It When You Believe It

A long time ago I used to go rock climbing with a few buddies.

All the different routes are rated on difficulty, and since all of us were at different levels, we had to pick a route that everybody could do.

Which meant the guy that was the least skilled controlled our choices.

That guy, by the way, was me.

But once I was climbing with this one guy, who really wanted to go up this really tough route.

It was a few levels above what I was capable of.

So he just fudged the numbers a little bit.

The way he presented it to me, was it was one more quick route that would only take an hour or so, before we drove home. It was “easy” and it would be a good one to end on.

When we were done, he told me that it was a couple levels higher than anything I’d ever done before.

But while I was climbing, I thought it was easy, so it was easy. I didn’t slip, didn’t miss any holds, I basically just walked right up. Like climbing a ladder.

Had he told me how hard it REALLY was, I would have been terrified.

The truth is that many things are like this, only the opposite.

We make things seem much harder, in our heads, than they really are.

And that, of course, makes them harder for real.

But what if could reverse the process?

What if we could look out into the world, look at something that USED to be hard, and simply convince yourself that it’s easy?

What would you be able to do?

If you could make anything easy, simply be changing what you believe about it.

How much more could you accomplish?

How much more could you get?

The good news is that there ARE proven techniques that will teach you this.

Allowing YOU to decide if something is hard or easy.

To learn how, check this out:

Belief