Category Archives: Charisma

Are You Waiting For Permission?

Press Forward

Why You Should Boldly Press Forward

One of the differences between being a child and being an adult is the idea of “permission.”

When we are very young, we need to ask permission for pretty much everything.

In school, we need permission to speak, to ask questions, sometimes even to go to the bathroom.

The older we get, the more we need to just take action without waiting for approval.

Sometimes, though, we don’t really need permission, but we pretend we do.

We’d like to do something, like walk over there and talk to that interesting person, or start a business, or make a suggestion to our boss.

But we hold back, and tell ourselves it’s because we need “permission.” We say things like, “Oh, they wouldn’t like that.”

Even though we’re fully functioning adults, often times we feel we need prior approval before taking any action that we’re not “supposed” to take.

But as I’m sure you know, those that succeed BIG don’t wait around for permission, or approval, or even validation.

They lead, knowing eventually others will follow.

In pretty much all areas of life, there have been pioneers who have created new products, inventions, types of music and art, medical techniques, and on and on, simply by acting on their own inspiration.

Now, most people are content to be followers. To wait around on the sidelines and watch the leaders and creators take all the risks, and get all the rewards.

They’re content to stay safely in the middle of the pack, where it’s “OK” to follow the herd.

What about you?

What about your ideas? 

Will you wait until you get full permission and approval before you try something new? 

Or will you just boldly go where no one has gone before?

It’s not easy, it’s not guaranteed, and it’s not always safe.

But it’s a LOT more fun that hiding in the middle of a crowd, waiting to be told what to do.

If you’re ready to get started, check this out:

Frame Control

Girl Getting Confidence Tricks

Extreme Confidence With Women

Obliterate All Fear

Here’s a trick that will blast your self confidence with girls through the roof.

However, you MUST understand one thing. The girls you use this “trick” on are NOT girls you are going to try and pick up.

They are only “practice” girls.

This means when you see a girl for the first time, and you’ve exchanged some IOI’s, you’ve got to decide BEFORE you go over there which category she’s in, and STICK to that decision.

Most guys CANNOT do this. They see a girl, and go over there and try anything and everything to get as far as they can, and either get her number, and leave (usually because SHE says she’s got to go or something) or they get blown out. (Which is when SHE says she’s got to go or something).

However, if you follow this strategy, you WILL see positive results.

So, assume you see a girl, and you decide she’s “practice.” Meaning you WILL NOT ask for her contact information or even suggest getting together. You won’t even tell her that you’re not going to ask for her number.

This is what you do.

You walk over and break the ice. Say something that paces the situation. Say you noticed her, you noticed something she did (actually say the thing she did) and then tell her you wanted to find out  more about her, because she seemed interesting.

(All of this is absolutely true, by the way.)

Then ask her name. Ask what she does. Ask open ended questions about anything she seems willing to tell you about. The idea, the goal, the intention, the mission, is to get her to smile while she’s talking to you about things she likes.

Once you get a few smiles, say thanks, and then LEAVE.

Don’t hesitate. Don’t linger. Don’t wait around for her to tell you what a genius alpha male you are or how clever you are.

LEAVE.

Remember, this is ONLY a confidence building exercise.

If you do this two or three times a week, your self confidence around women will SOAR.

But ONLY if you stick to the plan. The ENTIRE plan.

Wait…wait…wait…

What if she asks for YOUR number?

DO NOT GIVE IT TO HER.

Say something like, “Wow, I’m really flattered, but I’m not ready for a relationship or dating or anything right now.”

Right now, of course, meaning that very moment. You may be ready in another hour or so with another girl, but DO NOT tell her than.

This will build up a HUGE and POWERFUL belief in your brain that says this:

“Girls like me. Girls like talking to me. Girls want to talk to me more than I want to talk to them. Girls want me to stick around after I talk to them. Girls actually try to chase me.”

Do this a few times, and when you see a girl that’s NOT practice, it will be much, much easier.

Beware Of Seduction Patterns

Does Paint By Numbers Seduction Really Exist?

Paint By Numbers Pick Up?

There’s a lot of patterns out there that allegedly will help you get laid.

You memorize them, say them in the right order, and suddenly she’ll turn into your willing sex slave.

Now, just for a minute, imagine what the world would be like if this were actually true. First of all, everybody would be getting laid all the time.

It would be like in the movie, “Bruce Almighty,” when Bruce became God, and started answering “Yes!” to everybody’s prayers.

Good news? Everybody won the lottery.

Bad news? Their winnings were only about $1, since everybody won.

If there WAS some kind of magic string of words that would turn girls into raving sex maniacs, no girl would ever leave her house.

She’d be too terrified.

What if you knew that there was a magic set of words that would transfer ALL the money in your bank account into the person who said these magic words?

AND that anybody could learn these magic words on the internet, for free?

You’d keep all your cash in your house, that’s what. 

Simply because girls go out and talk to random guys is proof that magic words simply don’t exist.

Nor do convoluted language patterns and pick up techniques.

Don’t mean to burst your bubble, but if any “paint by numbers” technique existed, it wouldn’t last very long.

So stop looking for what to say, or what to do, and how exactly to use kino.

The secret of success, in ANY AREA, including getting girls, is simple.

Try something.

See what happens.

Did it work? Good. Do more.

No? No sweat. Try something different.

So, why don’t more guys understand this, and use this simple step by step “procedure” to getting laid (or getting whatever?)

It’s in the “try something” phase.

This part requires doing something WITHOUT KNOWING how it will turn out. Most people (let alone guys who want to pick up girls) are absolutely and utterly TERRIFIED of doing this.

So we “pretend” that we just  need to “learn more” or “study more” or whatever other lie we tell ourselves to keep us from getting rejected. Usually this involves us sitting around waiting for somebody to “tell us” what to do.

Milton Erickson, one of the most famous Hypnotherapists of all time (and upon whom most of NLP is based) had this genius “homework session” for one of his clients.

Guy comes in, and says he’s terrified of rejection. He’d like a girlfriend, but he’s terrified of talking to girls. 

What should I do, doc? 

Does Erickson talk about his childhood? His deep feelings about his mom? Does he make him memorize a bunch of language patterns?

Nope.

Erickson (who had a HUGE success rate only after one or two sessions) merely said this:

“OK, Mr. Client. I promise I can cure you. Do what I say, and you’ll have a girlfriend in no time.”

“Great doc! Thanks! I’ll do anything. What do I do?”

Doc says, “Go out and get rejected ten times, and then come see me next week.”

Client swallows and says OK. He comes back the next week.

“Well,” Doc says, “Did you get rejected ten times?”

“Nope.” Client says, smiling.

“Well, what happened?”

“Well, I got rejected six times, but girl number seven is now my girlfriend.”

See how that works?

Get in the game.

mindpersuasion.com

Here’s What Women Really Like

Secrets Of Female Desire

Secrets Of Female Desire

There’s some crazy tests they’ve done to see what turns men on, and what turns women on.

These are NOT those lame tests where they ASK people what turns them on. People generally give answers they THINK they should.

Luckily, science ALWAYS finds out how to get around human deception.

One way is to measure the size of the pupil. When we see something we like, our pupils get bigger. 

So they set up these ultra sensitive measuring eyeball things and flash a bunch of pictures.

And what do guys like looking at (according to their pupils)?

Girls. Girls in bikinis. Girls in bikinis with big boobs. Naked girls. Naked girls with big boobs. Naked girls with big boobs kissing each other.

OK, Ok, you get the idea.

Big surprise, right?

What makes girls pupils get bigger?

Babies.

Yep, among all the things, those do it for girls the most.

The moral of the story, then, is that when you’re going out picking up girls, bring a baby.

Just kidding.

But what this DOES tell us that when they flashed pictures of guys with ripped abs, all kinds of bling, even super gorgeous dudes that just walked off the cover of Men’s Health, the girls (according to their pupils) were, “Yea, whatever.”

Which means your body shape, your looks, your bling, your six pack (the one on your stomach or the one in that brown bag you think nobody sees) doesn’t mean squat.

Now, to some guys, this is great news. Most of us don’t belong on the cover of Men’s Health. I know I don’t (except maybe to show what happens when diet and exercise plans fail miserably).

But the folks who DO get angry at this are folks who spend tons of time in the gym, or tons of money on clothes.

They seem to believe they can follow the same playbook girls can. Meaning get in shape, dress nice, and just show up and wait for the girls to flock, like they’re peahens or something.

Here’s a newsflash. (One you already know).

The BEST way to get a girl to notice you, to get her fired up, to get her to want to go home with you (or at least give you her number), is to go up and TALK to her.

That means walking over there, introducing yourself, and find out what she’s all about, and letting her know what you’re all about.

Of course, HOW you talk to her will make all the difference. NOT what you’re wearing while you do.

Learn How:

mindpersuasion.com

Train Out Approach Anxiety With Mind Control

How To Evaporate Approach Anxiety

Total Control Of Your Feelings

Your brain is filled up with literally millions of memories.

What’s more, each and every memory can be seen in plenty of different ways. The older you get, the more you “understand” what your parents were trying to tell you as a kid.

This, of course, can be a double edged sword.

Since you can pretty much reference any memories with any flavor in an instant, you can use your own experience to validate any hair-brained idea that pops into your head.

If you think women are evil and will only hurt you, you’ll find plenty of personal memories to support that.

If you think women are all Angels of Heaven who were put here to bring sensual pleasure to God’s Earth, you’ll find THAT evidence in your past as well. 

It all depends on how willing you are to look for evidence CONTRARY to what you THINK is true.

Confirmation bias doesn’t ONLY color what we see in the world.

It colors which memories we decide to call up.

And here’s something else to wrap your mind around.

The collective color or energy of the memories you call up (usually within a few microseconds) will determine your state.

Your level of confidence, stress, verbal flexibility, motivation, and even your heart rate, breathing levels and perspiration (or lack thereof.).

All from the ten or twenty memories you pull up out of a memory bank of millions.

If you don’t like the way you “feel” in certain situations, it’s simply a matter of learning how to change your reference memories.

Just like building muscle memory, this takes time. If you want to naturally play the piano without thinking, you’re going to need to slowly go through each chord and play every note slowly and methodically, to build in that muscle-brain-sound memory.

Do that enough, and you can play anything by ear, instantly and perfectly.

Same goes with girls.

If you want to feel confident around girls, you’ve got to practice feeling confident. How do you do that?

First, decide what you’d like to feel.

Then, come up with a bunch of memories that MAKE you feel that way.

Then go into a situation where you’d LIKE to feel that way.

Then, just like practicing piano scales, FORCE yourself to slowly recall those memories, that make those feelings bubble up in your brain.

Now, this won’t be instantaneous, and it won’t be easy. Your thoughts are like a slippery eel on meth in vat of salad oil, so holding them won’t be easy.

And to be honest, most guys aren’t willing to do something like this. They’d rather pay for some imaginary quick fix instead of putting in some real work.

But consider what will happen if you DID put in the work.

Imagine six months or so from now, when you can walk up to anybody, anywhere, any time and feel TOTALLY comfortable, and TOTALLY on top of your game.

What will you do then?

Learn More:

mindpersuasion.com

Blast Away Approach Anxiety

How To Talk To Any Girl Without Fear Or Anxiety

How To Make Talking To Girls Easy

Here’s a quick set of mind tricks that will help you when you’re out talking to the ladies.

Whenever humans encounter a new situation that’s potentially beneficial, our brains quickly go through a couple of “scanning” processes.

The first thing is to imagine the “best case” scenario, and the next is to imagine the “worst case” scenario.

Then it calculates the likelihood of each happening, followed by the “strength” of each potential outcome.

I know this sounds like a LOT, but our brains are incredibly FAST.

Problem is they pay for that speed by not being very accurate.

So when your brain scans the past, it’s only going to grab a few of the “strongest” memories.

And since most guys have a LOT of memories of getting rejected by ladies, (real or imagined) your brain’s going to come back with a big fat DANGER signal.

THIS is where all that anxiety comes from.

How do you get rid of this anxiety?

Easy. Simply rewire your brain. 

How?

Two ways.

One is to take conscious control of your thoughts while out in the field. While you’re looking a girl you’d like to approach (based on IOI’s, flirting eye contact, etc.), literally FORCE your brain to think of positive memories with girls.

Think of the last time you had sex, or kissed a girl, or a girl looked at you in that special way.

And HOLD THAT thought while you’re walking over there and talking to her. This DOES take mental effort, but so long as you FORCE your brain to hold that thought, it will keep any fear from creeping in there. It’s not a “once and done” thought. It’s a “grab and hold” thought.

This may sound simple, but it is very, very difficult. If you’ve ever meditated, you know how difficult it is to force your brain to think of something simple, like a candle, or simple numbers from one to ten.

But your concentration is just like a muscle. The more you practice, the stronger it will get.

The SECOND way is to actually go out and CREATE positive responses from women.

This means walking up (or close to her) getting her to smile, and then leaving.

You need to build up a huge memory bank of experiences in your mind with YOU leaving a girl who WANTED YOU TO STAY.

Now, this may seem easy, but it’s VERY difficult. As soon as you get a nice smile, your caveman brain will be SCREAMING at you to go and talk to her. To hang out and hope for some good stuff.

In order for this to work, you’ve got to NOT do that.

If you do practice these two mental tricks regularly, you’ll be amazed how fast that approach anxiety vanishes.

Even more if you put this in the mix:

Frame Control

How To Skyrocket Your Attraction

Get Everybody On Your Johnson

How To Make All The Girls Want You

Most guys have several fears about approaching a girl and getting rejected.

To be sure, it’s that moment where she says “no” that’s pretty painful.

It’s also pretty painful, as most guys imagine everybody else is watching them.

One more reason it sucks is because most guys have been told or taught that if you try and number close every girl in the joint, you’ll be seen as some player who’s only after short term flings.

Now if you ARE only after short term flings, then that’s not a big deal.

But here’s something to consider. People ARE watching you, especially girls. And in that first moment you walk up to a girl, all the other girls who’ve got you on their radar (which is usually a lot more than you think) are thinking the same thing:

“Why’s he talking to HER?”

As I’m sure you know, girls are terribly competitive. Even if they have ZERO intentions of giving our their number, they STILL don’t like it when you approach somebody else and not them.

This is pretty fun to see when you’re actually looking for it. To see it in action, try this out:

Go somewhere where you can sit and watch people walking by. Then wait until there’re a couple of girls walking toward you, that are a good distance apart. Like maybe opposite sides of the street or something.

Then OBVIOUSLY check out one of them, long enough for the other one to notice (which won’t take long).

Then as soon as you STOP checking out girl A, quickly look at girl B on the sly. She’ll almost ALWAYS be staring at girl A, wondering why you were checking her out.

Bottom line, even if you aren’t a player, are good looking, or have any bling to speak of, girls will STILL get jealous when you talk to other girls instead of them.

But this will be significantly REDUCED if you’re going up and getting shot down all the time.

So here’s a really good way to increase your charisma, magnetism and attraction. Go and talk to a few girls, but DON’T try to close them. Your ONLY goal is to get them to smile.

As soon as you get a genuine smile or laugh, EJECT. Be nice, say nice talking to you, whatever, but LEAVE while they still have that smile on their face.

If you do this with three or four girls, separated out by twenty minutes or so, the other girls in the place will be going CRAZY.

So long as you’re not in some super loud nightclub packed wall to wall like sardines, this will work pretty good.

Then after you’ve had your fun, go and close somebody for real. 

To give you even more power, check this out:

Frame Control

How To Approach A Girl For The First Time

The Best Approach Angle For Success

Defocus With Congruence

It’s funny how things that are true on a huge, galactic scale are also true on a tiny, microcosmic scale.

Solar systems are made of suns with planets orbiting around them. Planets have moons orbiting around them. Atoms are made of a nucleus with electrons orbiting around it.

Interacting with girls is the same way, both on a large scale, and on a microcosmic scale.

For example, most guys know instinctively if you make girls the sole purpose of your life, you won’t get very far. 

Sure, there are some world famous pick up artists that are actually homeless, but because of their super tight game, they just move from relationship to relationship, always staying with the girls they are currently with. 

Even though they’re homeless, they never have to spend a single night on the street.

Now, for some, this would be a dream come true. But for most normal guys, this would kind of suck. It’s nice to have your own place, your own car, your own money, your own job and a boss who appreciated what you do and would fight tooth and nail to keep you on board.

In the big scheme of things, having a girl is a great PART of your life, to be sure. And all that comes with that later on (family, etc, if that’s what you want.)

But that shouldn’t be the central FOCUS of your life.

Similarly when you go out, making girls the most important focus isn’t likely the best strategy. Most guys, when they think back to the best nights of their lives, according to their interactions with females, were nights where they DIDN’T specifically go out looking for girls.

Take a look at this on an even smaller scale. Suppose you’re in some place with your boys, having fun. You see a cutie across the room, and you trade a few flirty eye locks.

If you dropped everything and walked over there while staring straight at her as if she were the ONLY person in the world, she’d likely flee in terror.

That’s why it’s always a good strategy to kind of “show up” next to her. Then simply “ease yourself” into a conversation with her.

Now, if you’re doing this as part of your “game,” and while you “pretend” to be nonchalant, you can’t get your mind off her, it might not work as well.

But if you’re attitude is to “make your way over there,” and “see what she’s like,” AND it’s congruent with your attitude toward girls both in life and that night, you’ll be much more successful.

You and she will be more relaxed when you talk. You’ll both be less likely to “put on your game face” and try any short term tricks.

Which means if you DO hit it off, it will be real, and not fake.

Now, holding that frame of mind can be tough.

This will help:

Frame Control

Do You Underestimate Your Instincts?

The Ancient Power Within

Ancient Powers Lie Within

Most of us overestimate the power of our conscious minds.

Not only that, but we underestimate the power of our instincts.

This isn’t easy for a lot people to hear, but it can be very useful to understand.

For example, if you’ve ever “cheated” on a diet, you know EXACTLY how powerful your instincts are.

After all they have been part of us for millions of years, and they deal with real world survival on a very real level.

When our instincts are telling us to eat, “they” really believe we are in danger if we don’t.

Which is why dieting by willpower alone is virtually impossible.

Fear of heights is another example. This is a natural born fear that exists deep in our programming. Try leaning over the edge of a high balcony and using your conscious mind to remove the fear.

These are a couple of instincts (fear and food) that we know and feel. Others are much more hidden beneath the surface.

Think about the last time you “cheated” on a diet, or promised yourself you weren’t going to eat or drink something, but you did anyway. Just before you ate it, you likely told yourself some “story” that sounded “logical” at the time.

But since you saw clear evidence of what you were doing, it’s easy to see this was just a rationalization.

But when we rationalize other instincts that we don’t acknowledge, we really tend to believe the rationalization as if it’s the real reason driving our behavior, and not the underlying instinct.

Which can get us into a lot of trouble. We end up saying, “Well, it sounded like a good idea at the time.”

What this really means is our instincts were driving our behavior, and our rationalizations for that behavior seemed logical enough.

Because we are deeply social creatures, two of the most powerful instincts that tend to operate outside of our conscious awareness are social proof and authority.

People that are in positions of authority can say the craziest things, and people will believe them as if they’re self-evident logic.

The strange thing about authority is that it’s not something that can be given to you. It has to be something that you simply assume to be true.

And since 99.99% of the people would be TERRIFIED of taking any kind of leadership role, assuming that position is pretty easy.

Naturally, this is like any other tool. You can use it for good, or you can use it for evil.

You can lead people to happiness, pleasure and wealth, or doom and despair. It’s completely up to you.

Where will you lead them?

Learn more:

Frame Control

How To Turn Her On

Talk Your Way Into Her Heart

How To Talk Girls Into Attraction

Many decades ago, Dale Carnegie taught the easiest way to talk to people is to talk about the thing that we all love talking about.

Ourselves.

So if you’re wanting to walk up and talk to pretty girls, in a way that will get them REALLY interested in you, this is a very useful bit of information.

Of course, HOW you do this will impact how well it works.

If you walk up to some gorgeous girl and say, “Wow, you’re gorgeous!”

You won’t get very far. One because she either hears this all the time, or she KNOWS this since everywhere she goes guys are staring at her with those unmistakable eyes of lust.

So you’re not really telling her anything new, and you’re not really showing any insight to who she is.

Believe it or not, super gorgeous girls would really like guys to like them for something OTHER than their looks.

How do we know this?

Because they talk. If gorgeous girls WERE just content to show up and be beautiful, they would never say anything. They’d just sit there and be happy to have guys stare at their boobs (or whatever).

But since they actually open their mouths, and actual words come out that describe the actual ideas in their heads, they would actually like somebody to take an interest in something BESIDES their boobs.

Hang on, we’re just getting started.

You can’t ask her opinion on something, and then tell her how awesome she is for having that opinion.

That’s too easy. She doesn’t want to be surrounded by spineless yes men.

You’ve got to do a little bit more work.

So, what do you talk about? Talk about her plans, her dreams, her ideas about complicated things (things YOU think are complicated, not things you think she thinks are complicated).

Get her to expand on that. See past her boobs and her surface structure language.

Find things deep beneath the surface that is really worth talking about.

Think of the conversation as a treasure hunt. Look for complicated ideas, opinions, plans and dreams way beneath the surface that you can find some overlap with your own deep structure.

That’s that DEEP connection that everybody is looking for.

But here’s the bad news. Most people don’t have much below the surface. Most people (guys and girls) are really filled with useless fluff.

This means you’ll need to talk to a lot of goofs before you find somebody worth your time.

But this realization in and of itself will have a pretty cool side effect.

When you look out into a sea of beautiful girls, you’ll realize that most of them really WON’T be worth your time. You’ll see it as a sorting process, rather than a horribly scary field of unending rejection land mines.

Which will make it much easier to talk to, qualify and more importantly, DISQUALIFY gorgeous girls.

Since this is something most guys know NOTHING about, you will have a HUGE advantage, and will be much, much more attractive.

This will help:

Frame Control