Category Archives: How To Talk To Girls

How To Become A Super Confident Seducer

Always See The Big Picture

See The Big Picture

Most guys are conning themselves when they imagine getting with the perfect girl.

When we imagine getting a girl, we imagine it as something that’s given to us, or something that’s earned.

Make no mistake, everybody likes getting rewards or free gifts, especially when there’s a heavenly honey and some fun between the sheets involved.

But in reality, this mindset puts you at a HUGE disadvantage. And truth be told, most men NEVER leave this mindset. That’s why most men, even grown professional men making tons of cash and holding huge positions of importance, still look at their wife as some kind of authority figure.

Especially if they met when they were young, like in their twenties or earlier.

Why is this? Men take a lot longer to “grow up” than women. Even in ancient societies, boys had to be forced into ceremonies where they were transformed from boys into men. If they didn’t go through the ceremony, they’d stay boys their whole lives and be a danger to the tribe.

Why didn’t they do this for girls? Why no ceremonies for turning girls into women?

Because back then, it happened naturally. Having a baby does that to a girl. When you’ve got a little kid who is absolutely desperate for you to keep them alive, it’s kind of hard NOT to “grow up.”

Of course, this isn’t so true any more. But there’s still a lingering “gap” between the maturity level of boys and girls.

Just ask any school teacher.

And when you walk up to a girl in a club with that attitude that she’s got all the goods, and you “hope” that she decides to “give you” some, you’re not doing yourself any favors.

Ideally, you should have such a good life that girls are trying to convince YOU to let THEM in.

Now, this may seem impossible with so many people just barely able to pay the bills.

But the good news is that this comes from the INSIDE, not the money in your bank account.

On a deep psychological level, attraction is triggered by your BELIEF of your own life, and your own potential.

If you need her to be happy, you’re not worth too much to her.

But if you DON’T need her to be happy, she’ll be much more into you. 

Now, most guys are pretty good at pretending or faking this. But they quickly slip back into the beta-male role after a month or two of a relationship.

Which is why girls lose interest a lot in the first few weeks or months. You’ve lost that quality. Or she finds out that quality was fake.

How do you get that quality, on a real and lasting level?

Always see the big picture. If you don’t have huge dreams in your life, get some. It doesn’t matter if they seem a million miles away. Just BELIEVE they will come to you some day, and do things to make that happen. Even small things. Remember, you only need to convince yourself.

So next time you talk to a cutie, or are about to, ask yourself something like this:

“Does the achievement of my life’s dreams depend on this girl? Can she help me achieve them? Or is she just looking for entertainment? Let me go and talk to her and find out if she qualifies.”

Then go and talk to her.

Essential Mind Tools:


mindpersuasion.com

How To Practice Seduction Confidence

Drills Are The Quickest Way To Improve Your Game

A Little Practice Yields Huge Results

Many people have tried, and failed with various NLP “procedures” when it comes to seduction.

What’s even more frustrating is when you go to a high priced seminar, try a bunch of goofy NLP stuff that works GREAT in the seminar room. Then a couple weeks later and you’re back to square one.

Many NLP trainers are borderline snake oil salesmen in their marketing. I get why they do that, but I’m not sure it’s so helpful.

For example, consider these two “buying” headlines:

Come To Our Seminar And Learn The Secrets Of Easy Seduction

vs.

Come To Our Seminar And Learn The Skills That Will Allow For Better Seduction After About Six Months Of Practice

One sounds great, the other one doesn’t. But one is much more accurate.

The reason that NLP “tricks” don’t work as advertised is that they need to be practiced.

Think of it from a purely biological, chemical and electrical perspective.

Our brains have neurons, which transmit electricity, and depending on where that electricity goes, certain emotions are felt. (I know, WAY over simplified).

When we see a girl, part of our brain generating intense pleasure at the potential possibility.

But another part of our brain generating fear at the potential negatives.

On a purely physical level, this is two circuits that are hard wired into our brains and are very THICK circuits. Imagine a very thick superconductor with no resistance.

Our eyes see the girl, and both parts of our brain (fear and pleasure) that are wired with the super conducting brain circuits light up.

When we do an NLP procedure, we are indeed laying down new circuits. But since these circuits are new, they are very thin and don’t conduct electricity nearly as well.

Like a one lane road vs. a super highway. Or a very thing copper wire vs. a superconductor.

When there’s no girl there, that “fresh” circuit works well.

But when we SEE a real girl, we default back to our original programming.

This is why doing an NLP procedure only once doesn’t do much.

Which is why you need to practice.

Just like practicing lay ups or scales or punches. The more you practice, the better you’ll do.

How do you practice?

One very powerful way is to simply go in the field, where there are MANY hot girls, and simply practice feeling confident around them. Purposely recall confident memories, just like in those seminars.

Once you naturally feel confident without much effort in the presence of girls (when your new wire is nice and thick), move on to the next step.

Sure, it’s a slow process. But keep in mind the ultimate goal.

To be able to walk up to any girl any where any time, and speak confidently, persuasively and seductively.

Isn’t that a goal worthy of some daily practice?

More Mind Tools:

mindpersuasion.com

Real Game Or Paper Game?

How To Develop Solid Inner Game

Become A Natural Seducer

What’s the difference between paper game and real game?

First, let’s consider the different reason girls go for certain guys. Every girl has a list of what she thinks she wants in a man. These are socially acceptable things like a decent income, decent parents, a sense of humor, good friends, no prison record, etc.

On the other hand, there are things a girl unconsciously responds to. Thing she can’t help. The things that create REAL attraction. These are less “definable” things like self confidence, charisma, assertiveness, and always feeling in control of his frame anywhere, any time.

Now, if a girl is super lucky, she’ll meet a guy who satisfies both categories. How likely is that?

Consider the ideal girl for each guy. A super sweetheart, cute face, nice body, good upbringing ,but a total freak in between the sheets.

How likely is this?

For guys, study after study shows that we like freaks for short term flings, but “good girls” for long term relationships.

Girls are the same way. They like the bad boy in their bed once in a while, but they want to hook their wagon to the nice guy with the decent income.

Even genetic studies have shown that ten or twenty percent of the time, they’re married to the good guy, but making babies with the bad boy.

Does this mean that all girls are evil sociopath’s and we should hide in the closet?

Not in the least.

But as a guy going out into the world, just realize that having “paper game” will only take you so far. Some guys assume that “paper game” is all you need.

But when it comes down to it, real game will trump paper game all the time.

Even if you’ve got not much going on for you financially, developing real game will not only get you good results with the ladies, but good results in life.

All those real game qualities (self confidence, frame control, mad social skills) will also work VERY WELL in pretty much any business situation.

You may even say that this “real game,” or more correctly, “inner game” is THE most important skill to cultivate in life.

Because once you’ve got rock solid inner game, money, jobs, careers, ladies, those will be easy. They won’t be automatic, but you’ll feel much more in charge.

You’ll have the experience of walking into a place and noticing that all the girls are noticing you, and hoping that you come and talk to them.

How do you improve your inner game?

Outer practice, and inner practice.

Outer practice is just getting out there and being a human. Interact with people. Practice feeling comfortable in strange situations. Practice holding your frame in uncomfortable situations. Practice speaking your mind when you know most people will disagree with you. Practice starting conversations with strangers and making them smile and feel good because of you.

You Can Learn Inner Practice Here:

Why You Should Be A Qualifier Of Women

Have A List And Stick To It

Make Her Pass Your Tests

When a guy is checking out a girl, he’s making a LOT of assumptions about her.

Plenty of guys only need a picture of a girl to literally fall in love with her.

Now, think about what’s going on for this to happen. They’re basically assuming all kinds of things about her personality, her likes, dislikes, beliefs, etc.

All from her pretty face and smoking body. All of which are highly made up to accentuate the “good” parts, and minimize or hide the “bad” parts.

If you’ve ever had the “let down” experience of seeing a favorite actor or actress in an interview, or give a speech during an awards ceremony, this is why.

We see them up on the screen, and imagine their characters (whose words are written by others and actions dictated by others) and actually think that’s really them, on some level.

Then when they’re in an interview, and sound nervous, super shy, or just plain dumb, it’s kind of a let down.

That’s what will happen when you walk over to that girl, imagining that she’s a super perfect princess.

And from her standpoint, it seems really creepy.

Think about it this way. Imagine some guy grabbed you off the street, and told you he had a job at a big company, and he KNEW you were perfect for the job.

He didn’t want to know your skills, your background, your education. He just told you he’d pay you alot, and he KNEW you’d be a PERFECT MATCH for the company.

On top of that, he seemed to be totally desperate to hire you.

Would you take the job? Unless you were one meal away from dying of starvation, probably not.

After all, what kind of job and what kind of company doesn’t care about your skills?

To even further expand this mind experiment, imagine that you’d just spend four years in school, working on a degree you thought was really important.

And this crazy hiring guy didn’t seem to care.

How would THAT make you feel?

This is precisely how girls feel when you walk up making all kinds of assumptions about her based ONLY on her looks.

Sure, a girl needs to look good. There’s no reason to interact (if you’re looking for a relationship of some sort) unless you’re physically attracted.

But don’t let that be your only reason.

You need to talk to her. Find out what she’s like. Figure you need at least FIVE things that must be true about any girl you date.

And only ONE of them can be her looks.

What would the other four be?

If you don’t have a list, you should have one. A good solid list of things about her that need to be true.

Then when you see a cutie, you KNOW she’s only 1/5 of the way there. The rest you need to find out via regular, old fashioned conversation.

This will not only make her easier to talk to, but YOU will be much more attractive.

Essential Free Mind Tools


mindpersuasion.com

How To Slowly Build Your Own Harem

How To Get Tons Of Girls - No Colored Feathers Required

How To Surround Yourself With Gorgeous Girls

If you want to get a girl to notice you, it’s pretty easy.

Now some guys will go to great lengths to make this happen.

They’ll spend hours a week in the gym. Deprive themselves of their favorite foods so they can get that six pack that allegedly attracts women in droves.

They’ll drop half their paycheck on clothes to hopefully get one or two ladies to turn their heads when they walk in the place.

Some will even wear big goofy hats that you can’t help but notice.

Of course, if you’re a peacock, this works pretty well. But in the world of peacocks the dude just shows up with all the other dudes, and the ladies pick the guy with the brightest feathers.

If this is the way it worked for humans, all those billboards and magazine ads you see wouldn’t be for women’s clothes, they’d be for men’s clothes.

And men would be the ones paying twice as much for dry cleaning, and worrying about what shoes to go with what outfit. 

Luckily, we’re not peacocks. We can do more than change our appearance, and then sit on the bar stool hoping we get noticed.

So, what’s the secret?

Well, you already know this, so it’s not much of a secret.

Walk over there and talk to her!

See, as much as guys pound their chests about how they’re super hero alphas who slay the ladies at every turn, most guys are TERRIFIED of talking to girls. Especially girls they are interested in.

Sure, they do a good job of covering this up, even to themselves.

Some guys even choose entire CAREERS based on the women they think it will get them.

But if you can talk a good game, NONE of that other stuff matters.

And what’s the best way to get good at talking to girls?

Well, this isn’t a trick question. 

Talk to more girls!

Here’s a mind experiment. Really think about this one.

What if you made a commitment right here, right now, to NEVER try and “pick up” a girl.

You NEVER asked for a phone number. You NEVER made any kind of suggestions about getting together.

From now on, no matter what, all you wanted to do was talk to girls and enjoy the conversation, ANY WAY you could.

Now think about this for a minute.

If you were really serious, and decided to NEVER close a girl in any way shape or form, what would happen?

Well, you’d talk to a lot more girls since there would be no pressure, only fun.

Which means you’d get more relaxed.

Which means you’d enjoy their company, and they yours.

And your subconsciously driven, natural feedback loop would kick in. Just like a little kid learns to walk based on natural feedback, your ability to make her laugh, smile and feel good would naturally and consistently improve.

And pretty soon, girls would start closing you. Remember, the ONLY RULE of this “mind experiment” is that you can’t close them. If they close you, and you’re into her, then let her have you.

What would your life be like in six months?

All the girls in your life would be TOTALLY INTO YOU.

You’d never worry about flakes, never worry about how long to wait until she called you back etc.

All the nonsense would take care of itself.

Now ask yourself this honest question:

How much action have you gotten in the last six months?

Would you be willing to do this experiment for the next six months?

Try and see what happens.

Girl Getting Mind Tools:


mindpersuasion.com

Find The Girl Of Your Dreams

How To Create The Perfect Relationship

Are High Quality Women A Myth?

Most guys think they need to become a shopping list to get girls.

They think they need a certain level of income, a certain amount of body fat, a certain type of clothing before a girl gives them the time of day.

Then once they get all these things, they wonder why the princesses don’t suddenly fall into their lap.

Most girls, when asked about their “perfect husband” will give you a list of things they THINK are important to them.

Pretty much anybody is asked about such an important thing as a life partner, they tell you what they think they should say, rather than what really floats their boat.

Does this mean that people are horrible liars? Not at all.

It’s just that most times, we don’t really KNOW what floats our boat. Sure, we RESPOND to it when it comes around, but unless we’re ultra honest with ourselves (which is pretty impossible, btw), we’re usually blinded when it happens.

That’s why girls tend to fall in love with guys that they “didn’t think were my type” all the time.

It’s kind of like the difference between shopping for food when you’re hungry, vs. when you’re full.

When you’re full, you buy all the crap you THINK you should want. Usually healthy stuff.

When when you’re hungry, you buy stuff you REALLY want. Usually not so healthy.

This isn’t to say that what drives attraction is or isn’t healthy, it’s just an illustration to see the difference between what we want, and what we think we want.

So if you pay too much attention to conventional wisdom about what girls want (decent income, nice clothes, sense of humor, likes changing diapers, etc) you are going to be in for a HORRIBLE shock.

What do I mean?

She sees you coming along, with your personality based on her “consciously chosen things.” Then because you fit the bill, she goes with you because on paper, you LOOK like a good “catch.”

She might even get excited about showing her friends and family her good catch.

But her emotions won’t get fired up. Not even close.

Which means once she feels she’s got you on the hook, you’ll be nothing more than an ATM to her.

A provider, not a lover.

So forget about what girls TELL you what they want. Forget about convention wisdom.

Trigger those deep desires that make her chase the man of her dreams DESPITE what her friends and family might say.

When she thinks about you, she shouldn’t think of you as some “checkmark” in her box if things to do in life.

She shouldn’t be able to get her mind off you. Her heart should race when her phone vibrates. She should be nervous as hell when getting dressed to meet you.

How do you create THOSE feelings?

Your language. Your confidence. Your energy. How you talk to her, and then pull back. How you demonstrate that you like her, but you don’t need her. How you build your life with or without her.

Learn to test for REAL attraction. Unconscious attraction. Deep and ancient desire.

The kind that makes it OBVIOIUS she can’t live without you. The girls that DON’T display this level of desire? Not worth your time. Unless you’re content to be a trophy on her mantel.

However, don’t expect these girls to come to you. You’ve got to meet them, create, build and sustain attraction. Real attraction.

Will it be easy? No. 

But once you get a girl like that, she’ll be yours for life.

Get Essential Mind Tools:


mindpersuasion.com

Three Rules For Creating Attraction

Step By Step Rules To Attraction

How To Create Female Interest

Most guys think too much when thinking about girls.

There’s a lot going on to be sure, but if you over think anything, you can get yourself into trouble.

What very common mistake is to assume that attraction happens on a conscious level.

We’ve all heard that “attraction isn’t a choice” over and over, but many guys still behave like it is.

What do I mean?

They do something, and expect a girl to give them something back. Like doing a business deal, or even buying something at the store.

They buy her a drink, and think she “should” do something, like at least talk to them.

They bring her flowers, and think she “should” let him kiss her.

They have a decent income, and think that girls “should” be attracted to them.

But girls NEVER do anything attraction based because they WANT to, or they CHOOSE to.

Any kind of attraction based behavior is subconscious.

This is hard for guys to understand, because we see girls and we AUTOMATICALLY become attracted to them in a few seconds. If she’s put together, is cute, and is dressed nice, it doesn’t take long.

Girls, on the other hand, take a while to “feel attraction” for a buy.

But just because it takes a while, doesn’t mean it’s a conscious process. It is STILL just as unconscious as a guy’s attraction for a girl.

Which means no matter WHAT you do, she’s NOT going to think, “Hmm, he did this so I should start to like him, and give him some of my feminine energy.”

Nope. Ain’t gonna happen.

No matter WHAT you do, it HAS to be an unconscious response.

If she doesn’t give you any signs of attraction, SHE’S NOT ATTRACTED.

How do you create attraction?

Luckily, there ARE some basic “rules” for guys to create attraction in girls, just like most guys tend to agree what sexually attractive girls look like.

But make no mistake, just like guys have different types, so do girls.

So the first rule is to BE THE SAME throughout your entire interaction.

If you do something that gets her attracted to you, and then change your behavior, she’ll lose that feeling.

The second rule is to take your time. Let her respond to you. 

The third rule is to be able to MEASURE her attraction. Girls may feel really attracted to you, but consciously hold back, for whatever reason.

How can you tell?

Her pupils, how she responds when you touch her, how she responds when you lean into her personal space, if you ask her to come with you (across the room) and she follows right away.

If you’re waiting for her to TELL YOU she’s attracted, you’ll be waiting a long time.

But if you learn to SEE the “symptoms” of attraction, you’ll be surprised.

Essential Mind Tools:


mindpersuasion.com

How To Eliminate Rejection From Girls

Back Off Man, I'm A Scientist!

Never Face Rejection Again

The human brain is a pretty amazing tool.

One that’s not even close to being understood yet. 

It’s very fast, which is great for survival. But it’s not so accurate. In a sense, it’s a lot like your web browser.

When you visit a familiar site, instead of loading up all the stuff fresh, it references your browser’s cache.

This makes it load much quicker than if you had to download everything every single time.

Web servers do this as well. If the page is static, they serve up a cached copy, as it’s much quicker.

This is how the brain operates in both familiar and unfamiliar surroundings.

A long, long time ago, maybe there were people that needed to stare at something for a long time, and let the information soak in long enough to figure out what was what.

But they all got eaten by dinosaurs. Which means the only people that are left are us goofs who don’t reference reality any more than your web browser downloads every  piece of data every time you visit the same web site.

Science has measured this. They know which areas of the brain are responsible for imaginary stuff, and which part is responsible for reality stuff.

Most of the time, it’s a mix of two.

Why is this important?

Well, consider this next time you’re out checking out the ladies. One of the reasons guys get so nervous is they see some super hot girl, and make all kinds of assumptions about her.

And because are much more attracted to women based on looks, this puts us at a disadvantage.

We walk over there, already having decided that she passes all of our criteria. Only she knows nothing about us.

So we feel like we’re walking over there with her having all the power. The power to accept us, or the power to reject us.

This, of course, causes all kinds of anxiety.

But when you remember that what you’re seeing is literally an illusion, it makes it easier.

Now, this is something you’ll have to consciously remember, and practice. There’s NO magic thought that you only need to think once that will get rid of your fears.

It’s something you need to train in. Just like a mental version of Karate Kid.

But this is a good way to practice.

When you see her, don’t let your caveman get away with assuming all kinds of crap. Go over there NOT to hopefully get accepted, but to find out if she IS as hot as you think she is.

All girls have flaws. Just like all guys have flaws.

See your first approach to get a better picture of her. Withhold judgment of her, until you talk to her.

If you approach with this mindset, you’ll never get rejected.

Because you’re not trying to get accepted.

You’re just getting more information.

Powerful Mind Tools:


mindpersuasion.com

Why You Should Love Rejection

Rejection Is Your Fastest Path To Success

Rejection Is Essential To Success

A lot of guys have a common problem with women.

And that is that they are waiting for some kind of obvious “green light” that tells them it’s OK.

This is normal. Nobody likes taking risks. We’d all love some perfect step by step method that is guaranteed to work. Some paint by the numbers system that gets us whatever we want, especially affection from gorgeous girls, without every having to put it on the line.

The trouble is that NOTHING is certain. All action requires risk. Sure, some actions are so LOW in risk they seem risk free. Things like ordering a pizza, going to the toilet in the middle of the night, or anything else simple and routine that we do over and over again.

But the simple truth of reality is that we absolutely cannot predict the future. 

It’s very common to be sitting there on the couch or in the bar talking to the girl of your dreams, and wondering whether or not you should make a move. And many guys DON’T make a move, and later claim that it was because they weren’t getting the right signals.

This is utter nonsense.

Let’s take a step back and see this from a scientific and biological perspective.

If a guy makes a move, and gets shot down, he’s going to feel like crap. BUT it won’t likely affect his social standing.  Think about one of your buddies right now. Now imagine him making a move (not an obscene or illegal move) and getting shot down. Politely shot down, not some girl screaming bloody murder.

Now, how do you feel about him after imagining that he tried and got shot down? Is he a social outcast? Is he some pariah to be avoided? Are the guys going to suddenly stop talking when he comes around, and look around in an uncomfortable silence?

Nope. If anything, he’ll get more props for trying.

Now imagine if a girl gave clear and obvious signs that she wants to be kissed. And SHE gets shot down.

What would happen to her reputation? What would her friends say? What would happen if she were known as the girl who throws herself at guys?

You know what would happen. Every girl who knew her (and every guy) would suddenly use different adjectives to describe her. (Easy, for example.)

So if you are waiting for a girl to make it obvious she wants you to kiss her, or touch her, or ask for her number, you’re going to be waiting a long time.

Not fair? Maybe not. But so what?

If you want success, you’re going to have to make a move. A risky move.

As the great founder of Sony once said, “If you want to double your success rate, simply double your failure rate!”

Now go out there and get shot down!

Girl Getting Confidence Tricks

Extreme Confidence With Women

Obliterate All Fear

Here’s a trick that will blast your self confidence with girls through the roof.

However, you MUST understand one thing. The girls you use this “trick” on are NOT girls you are going to try and pick up.

They are only “practice” girls.

This means when you see a girl for the first time, and you’ve exchanged some IOI’s, you’ve got to decide BEFORE you go over there which category she’s in, and STICK to that decision.

Most guys CANNOT do this. They see a girl, and go over there and try anything and everything to get as far as they can, and either get her number, and leave (usually because SHE says she’s got to go or something) or they get blown out. (Which is when SHE says she’s got to go or something).

However, if you follow this strategy, you WILL see positive results.

So, assume you see a girl, and you decide she’s “practice.” Meaning you WILL NOT ask for her contact information or even suggest getting together. You won’t even tell her that you’re not going to ask for her number.

This is what you do.

You walk over and break the ice. Say something that paces the situation. Say you noticed her, you noticed something she did (actually say the thing she did) and then tell her you wanted to find out  more about her, because she seemed interesting.

(All of this is absolutely true, by the way.)

Then ask her name. Ask what she does. Ask open ended questions about anything she seems willing to tell you about. The idea, the goal, the intention, the mission, is to get her to smile while she’s talking to you about things she likes.

Once you get a few smiles, say thanks, and then LEAVE.

Don’t hesitate. Don’t linger. Don’t wait around for her to tell you what a genius alpha male you are or how clever you are.

LEAVE.

Remember, this is ONLY a confidence building exercise.

If you do this two or three times a week, your self confidence around women will SOAR.

But ONLY if you stick to the plan. The ENTIRE plan.

Wait…wait…wait…

What if she asks for YOUR number?

DO NOT GIVE IT TO HER.

Say something like, “Wow, I’m really flattered, but I’m not ready for a relationship or dating or anything right now.”

Right now, of course, meaning that very moment. You may be ready in another hour or so with another girl, but DO NOT tell her than.

This will build up a HUGE and POWERFUL belief in your brain that says this:

“Girls like me. Girls like talking to me. Girls want to talk to me more than I want to talk to them. Girls want me to stick around after I talk to them. Girls actually try to chase me.”

Do this a few times, and when you see a girl that’s NOT practice, it will be much, much easier.