Category Archives: Human Nature

How Much Junk Do You Have?

My dad was a packrat.

Whenever he would buy something, he would keep the box.

“Just in case.”

When I was a kid, we had no problem finding a box for any purpose.

If you’ve ever moved from one house to another, you may have been faced with the difficult question.

“Should I keep this or trash it?”

Especially if you are the one boxing everything up, putting it in the truck (or your friends’ cars) and then unloading it.

You look at it and think, “Wow, I’ve had this for years, but I forgot it. Do I really need to keep it?”

Of course, you still think that you might one day “need” that stuff.

A good rule of thumb is that if you haven’t used it in the past year, you can safely trash it.

Some even say you should do this once a year, even if you’re not moving. It can really give you a “fresh” feeling, even though you haven’t really done anything except throw a bunch of stuff in the garbage.

But even this is hard. You might have a favorite shirt, one you haven’t worn in YEARS.

But when you think about throwing it out, you might start to feel sad. Melancholy for the “good ‘ol days.”

Sure, there are extremes. There are people who shun ALL material possessions. They wander the earth in search of truth.

Then there are those people to keep EVERYTHING. They even make TV shows about them. How their entire houses are filled with all kinds of junk they don’t even know they have.

Human emotions are kind of like that. Our deep instincts.

They were formed when life was dangerous. When we had to chase our food, and other critters were chasing us because WE were food.

But it’s not like that any more.

Many of those fears and trepidations are like that old shirt you haven’t worn in a decade.

It might a bit painful to throw it in the trash, but once you do, you’ll feel a sense of lightness that will make EVERYTHING seem new.

And since you’ve got a whole CLOSETFULL of those old fears in your brain that you simply DO NOT NEED anymore, you can start throwing them out one by one.

And slowly replace them with better feelings and attitudes and beliefs. Just like you can replace that old disco shirt for one that’s much more stylish, and will get you much better attention.

Get Started:

Fearless

Harmonic Oscillating Playgrounds

Swing Your Way Through Life

Resonance was always one of my favorite subjects.

Every physical entity has a certain “frequency.” Meaning if you hit it, it will shake at its own frequency.

Now, most objects like chairs or tables or watermelons don’t shake or resonate very long. That’s what’s called “over-damped resonance.” Meaning the way the system is set, it physically can’t shake for very long.

Then you have “under-damped” resonance. These are things that shake, or swing back and forth a long, long time. Like a pendulum, or a swing.

And if you apply the external force at the SAME frequency as that objects resonance frequency, you can get some pretty BIG oscillations.

Kids on a swing for example. When they pump their legs back and forth, they are pumping them back and forth at the precise frequency of the swing-kid combination.

They THINK they’re just playing on the swing, but what they’re REALLY doing is “applying a specific resonance frequency to an under-damped harmonic oscillator.”

Funny thing is that when they want to get off, they can do so pretty quickly. They just pump their legs at the OPPOSITE resonant frequency, and they slow down in a hurry.

Now, some systems are super easy to understand. Swings, pendulums, yo-yo’s, etc. You can get them swinging pretty quickly, and stop them pretty quickly.

Other things are more complicated. But the same structure nonetheless.

Every time you are “in the zone” while having a conversation, for example, you and your conversation partner are resonating off each other’s personal resonance frequency.

When you meet that special somebody, and you really “click” you’re continuously and unconsciously pushing each others buttons in the right frequency.

Any time people get into a fight or disagreement, it even shows up in our language.

“Not on the same page.”

“Not speaking the same language.”

“Not talking about the same thing.”

Keeping this idea of “resonance” in mind can be helpful. You can think of two people be in or out of resonance.

You can think of you and the world being in or out of resonance. Or you and a project you are working on, or you and whatever it is you are creating.

Whenever you push, the world will push back. Just like the kid on the swing. If you try and FORCE the world into YOUR frequency, it usually doesn’t work.

But when you step back, clear your mind, and pay attention, then you can operate within the world, at the WORLD’S frequency.

Making everything smoother and more natural. Gliding through life, getting whatever you want.

Getting your mind right is the first step.

Learn More:

Mind Persuasion

Find Their Buried Treasure

The Diamond Inside

Long time ago I went to this persuasion seminar.

One of the metaphors was a Russian doll. The speaker actually had one of those dolls that had a bunch of smaller dolls on the inside.

On the very inside, to emphasize his point, was a real blue diamond. Very rare. Very expensive.

The message, of course, was that everybody has something EXTREMELY valuable on the inside.

And it’s our job, as communicators, to find that.

Since most people are afraid to go first, it will help our cause (whatever you’re individual cause may be) to GO FIRST.

Most people won’t approach, so they wait for somebody else to approach.

Most people won’t start conversations, so they wait for somebody else to start conversations.

This puts YOU in a very powerful position.

You, of course, are an EXPERT on the human condition.

We all are, since we’re all humans!

When you start off by ASSUMING that person has treasure buried deep beneath their fears, you’ll speak to them in a much different way.

However, this requires a couple of things to happen.

One is you’ve got to be wholly congruent yourself. If you walk over and start talking, but are nervous or anxious, it’s going to come across in your body language, facial expressions, and overall energy.

Luckily, this is pretty easy to fix. Just take a few minutes every day, and relax into your emotions. Imagine something scary or unpleasant, and just accept those emotions. Don’t try to change them, or ignore them, or explain them away.

Just accept them as part of who you are.

We ALL have a HUGE mix of emotions. Good ones, neutral ones and bad ones.

If you can accept ALL of them as purely natural, then you’re WAY ahead of the game.

The second thing you can do, to open up the treasure in others, is to ask them the right questions, in the right way.

Instead of sounding like an interrogator, you’ll sound like you are GENUINELY interested in them, which you will be.

Simply by being in their presence, you’ll make them feel safe and comfortable. Comfortable enough to share with you their deepest desires. The greatest hopes. Their biggest dreams.

And once they start talking about them (with you), a few pretty AMAZING things will happen.

One is they’ll NEVER forget you. Since so few people have EVER made them feel that way.

Two is that they’ll subconsciously associate those dreams and desires with YOU.

Three is that ANYTHING you say or suggest will be much, much more likely to be accepted and acted upon by them.

And I’m sure you can start to imagine, now, how many ways you can use these skills!

Get Started:

Interpersonal Resonance