There’s always been a debate about what makes up our “humanness.”

We know we are “animals” like all of other “animals.”

We share internal organs, brain, blood, bones, skin, etc.

But why are humans SO much different?

One thing is that we are self-aware.

Another is that we can speak.

Another, more important thing, is we can learn.

Not just simple things, like fetching a ball or simple sign language.

But complex things like the mathematics to describe space travel.

Science to understand medicine, so one “brain” can operate on another “brain.”

We also have a lot of instincts.

We are naturally frightened of certain things, and we are naturally drawn to certain things.

When you smell a particular odor, you don’t need to “think” how to respond.

It happens automatically.

Athletes have known for centuries that you can “train” in new “instincts.”

This is the whole gimmick behind both “Karate Kid” movies.

Wax on, wax off, until it’s programmed into the muscle memory.

Some things, we learn once, and that’s it.

Once you learn how to ride a bike, or how to tie your shoes, you’ll never need to “re-learn.”

But other things, usually things that involve interacting with other people, aren’t like that.

These are kind of like endurance.

If you started jogging every day, it might take a while before you could run 10K in less than 45 minutes.

And you’d have to KEEP jogging every day to maintain that level of endurance.

Nobody thinks, before they start any physical training program, that they will get to a level where it will become “permanent” and they can STOP exercising.

If you want to get a six pack, it’s going to take effort to GET IT, and it’s going to take effort to MAINTAIN IT.

Social confidence is the same thing. It’s not “set and forget” like riding a bike.

It’s not a certain technique that you “learn how” to do.

There ARE techniques that ARE simple to learn, but they require a certain level of social confidence to do.

For example, it’s pretty simple to learn how to use your gestures effectively, to communicate on a subconscious level.

To get whoever is listening to you (individual or group) to take a certain action.

But in order to be able to DO that certain technique, you’ve got to have a base level of social confidence.

Luckily, there are plenty of exercises that will let you GET that much social confidence, and KEEP it when you get there.

Just like a six pack or a sub-45 minute 10K.
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