How To Plan Your Relationships

Do You Depend On Blind Luck?

Don’t Rely On Blind Luck

Do you have any seduction goals?

Most guys don’t. Most guys are happy with their preprogrammed desires for sex, intimacy, and companionship. They go out, keep trying, until these get fulfilled.

For a long, long time, this was all men needed. Only in recent times did people need to consciously plan what they were going after. Why?

Up until fifty years or so ago, once a guy and a girl hooked up, there were plenty of “negative incentives” to keep them together. Meaning if they broke up, especially after they were married and had kids, everybody would know.

Even on “Mad Men” there was that one single mom in the neighborhood that everybody gossiped about.

The thing about having “negative incentives” is that we don’t tend to notice them. Kind of like having a boss that will fire you if you show up late. So long the rest of the job is pretty good, and you get paid well, getting up early in order to show up on time (so you don’t get fired) will kind of slip into the back of your mind.

At first it might be pretty difficult, but pretty soon it will be just be something that you do without thinking.

This is the kind of world couples lived in a generation or so ago. Since they were many more negative incentives regarding breaking up, they were much more motivated to work on the relationship, and deal with whatever issues came up instead of ignoring them.

Nowadays, people don’t do that. There’s zero stigma with breaking up, getting divorced, or being a single parent.

Which means if you want a happy relationship, it’s going to take a lot of SELF MOTIVATION, rather than relying on those external negative incentives.

However, most guys don’t even realize this. They just hook up with whoever they can hook up with, cross their fingers and hope for the best.

Now, sometimes you’ll get lucky. Sometimes you’ll meet a girl from a similar background, who has similar beliefs as you, and shares plenty of the same interests. This will make it much more likely you’ll both WANT to work on any issues, as you genuinely like each other’s company, beyond just sex and intimacy.

But if you just get with whoever you can get with, this isn’t very likely.

Instead, consider the type of girl you’re going after. Consider the type of girl you’d like to hang out with AFTER that initial thrill wears off. Consider a girl who has the same basic life plans as you, instead of some girl who you expect will blindly follow you wherever you go.

To be sure, this is a lot of work. But the work you put into today will save you a lot of pain tomorrow.

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