Putting yourself in somebody else’s shoes is an incredibly effective way of becoming more persuasive.

This is true in sales, romance, and any kind of conversation where you’re trying to get your ideas across with little resistance.

The secret to all influence is taking your idea, and translating them so they are easily accepted by others, based on their own “model of the world.”

This includes their beliefs, their recent experience, and what they think is important.

For example, let’s say you were selling bananas. And you could sell them based on their nutritional value, or their taste, or their versatility. (Just go with it, OK?)

Now, if you came across somebody who was a health nut, and planned out all their meals based on specific nutritional information, it wouldn’t do you very good to try and sell them your bananas based on how delicious they were.

On the other hand, if you came across somebody who ONLY chose food based on taste, you’d be wasting your breath if you talked about all the vitamins and minerals in a banana.

Talking to girls is the same way. 

Now, I’m not saying to walk up to a girl and start selling her your banana!

However, instead of walking up and spitting some goofy lines WITHOUT first talking to her and seeing what she’s all about, like most guys do, take some time to get to know her.

Find out what’s important to her. Find out what spins her propellers.

The cool thing about this method is that if you’re talking to her about what she likes, what kinds of things turns her on (not like that!), what her dreams are for the future, something pretty cool will happen.

She’ll start to see YOU, through HER OWN filters of desire.

So if you hold off just a little bit, and turn on her own filters of desire BEFORE you start saying anything about you, you’ll have a MASSIVE ADVANTAGE.

Once her desires and filters are fired up, she’ll be much more likely to be attracted to you (and your banana, lol) when you DO get around to talking about yourself and your interests.

Especially when you inevitably find those things you’ve got in common.

The truth is that HOW you talk to her is much more important than WHAT you talk about.

Learn how to talk to her in that special way so she can’t help falling for you.