Many guys look at relationships the wrong way. So do many women. A common belief is that there is something “missing” and that once we get into a relationship with the right person, that missing piece will be filled, and we’ll be more complete.

That’s sort of true, but not in the way we think.

Part of that comes from our natural tendency to mix metaphors. We think in terms of creating like going somewhere. And what happens when you are going somewhere? There’s the going part, and the arriving part.

What happens after the arriving part? We usually think of sitting around and not doing much. 

Even when we talk about becoming “successful” in life (whatever  THAT means) we use terms like “I’ve arrived!”

Meaning all the “work” is done, and you just need to enjoy the fruits of your labor.

Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you look at it) it doesn’t really work like that.

In reality, we never really “arrive” anywhere. We get to new levels, new situations, expanded responsibilities and skills, but we never get to a point were we just get to kick back and enjoy life.

Even sports teams that win major championships don’t rest too long. They know after a couple weeks, they need to start getting in shape to defend their title.

If you’re in any kind of business, every successful product launch is the start of researching something even better.

A lot of problems guys have with girls is that they can’t find a girl who will fit into their ideal model of their ideal partner.

But here’s the thing. Humans are hard wired to see sexual partners as wealth creating partners.

For the longest time in human history, the main requirement to human bonding was a shared responsibility in finding and accumulating wealth, whatever “wealth” meant at the time.

Which means if you are looking for a partner, she’s at least got to have an understanding by what you mean by “finding and accumulating wealth.”

Now, this is a very vague term, and I don’t mean “money” when I say “wealth.” I mean whatever it is you are creating with your life. Whatever goals or careers you’ve got lined up.

The happiest couples compliment and support each other. It’s not a one way street.

This can only come naturally when there are two things present.

One is there must be real attraction. You can’t just hand her your resume and hope she’s convinced by your stats.

You’ve got to talk to her in a way that gets her juices flowing.

Not just once, but consistently.

The second thing you must have is an absolute faith in yourself that your plan for your life is important and worthy.

Sadly, most guys have neither of these.

If you don’t, start building them.

mindpersuasion.com