Stop Pushing People Around!
They may not be “in your face” type of high energy, but they are pretty relentless. In most sales, one technique (certainly not the best) is to simply keep closing until the client just gives up and buys.
There’s a famous book called “When I Say No I Feel Guilty” which is about being assertive. There’s a technique in there called “The Broken Record.” This is exactly like it sounds. You just keep repeating your point until the other side gives up.
It works great if your dealing with a fussy customer service person, or trying to get a refund without a receipt.
What about sales, or even seduction?
First, lets consider sales. You’ve got a product, and your client may or may not want it. Ideally, they’d buy it for their own reasons. But if you sit around and wait for them to come up with their own reasons, you may be waiting a while.
So you start to push them, slightly. You say buy, they say no. You say buy, they say maybe. You say buy, they say give me a better deal. You say buy, they say OK.
Now, this may seem like some masterful sales technique that only advanced persuaders know, but it’s really only a hair above bullying.
You’re not really building up value in the product. Your just making it more uncomfortable for them to say no. So maybe by comparison, buying is looking like a better option. If only to get you out of their face.
The only problem comes when they get home, use the product, and find out it sucks. Then they feel conned. Angry. Cheated. By you.
Lots of guys do this with girls. Lots of girls have low self esteem. Lots of guys have low self esteem.
So what happens when you keep pressuring somebody that has low self esteem? They give in, that’s what.
But then they get buyers remorse. This is why you may be getting laid a lot, but then they vanish.
They are getting buyers remorse.
How do you avoid that? Don’t bully them. Don’t overwhelm them with what you want until they give in.
Take your time. Talk to them about things they like. Things they dream about. Their ideal future. Their ideal job. Their favorite movies, etc.
Of course, you’ve got to go back and forth a bit, ask and share, etc.
But if you spend some time opening them up, talking about what they like, they’ll start seeing you through the filter and frame of their own desires.
Which means they’ll start liking you for THEIR reasons, rather than yours.