Category Archives: Attraction

Easy First Conversation Techniques With Women

Easy Peasy Cherry Squeezy

Easier Than You Think

What’s better, to chase women, or to get women to chase you?

In reality, you need a mix of the two. If you try to get women to do EVERYTHING, you’re going to be lonely.

Go to any club and you’ll plenty of guys hugging the walls waiting for the girls to make a move.

On the other hand, if you are always pushing forward no matter WHAT, she’s going to be put off.

The trick is to first assert yourself, then pull back a little, and make sure she follows.

This can be physical, or conversational, or even attention wise.

But make no mistake, get used to the idea that you’re going to have to make the first approach.

You’re going to have to get the conversation started. You’re going to have to assume the authority position and make it easy for her to talk to. You are going to have to take the initial risks.

Then you pull back, and see if she’s interested enough to follow you.

Nothing dramatic, just small “tests” to see if she’s interested.

Of course, the most basic test is to simply ask for her number.  If she gives it to right away with a smile on her face, you’re doing pretty good.

But as you know, many girls will give our their numbers without really being interested. They aren’t being mean or deceptive, it’s just VERY hard sometimes to say “no.”

So if you’re the type that makes it a point to collect tons of numbers, you realize it’s a “numbers” game.

But you CAN tell whether or not she’s into you or not BEFORE you ask for the number, if you know what to look for.

Does she carry her half of the conversation? Does she offer up “free information” or do you feel like you are pulling teeth?

If you touch her lightly on the forearm, does she pull her arm back in disgust, or does she seem to warm up to you slightly, or even reciprocate within a few moments? Are here eyes wandering around the place while you’re talking to her or is she looking at you most of the time?

These are all fantastic signs that you’re doing well with her. When this happens, don’t draw it out.  She’ll never say, “Let me give you my number so you can ask me out!”

It’s your job to approach, it’s your job to “read the air” and determine if she’s into you, AND it’s your job to get her number and get out before you blow it.

A lot to remember, to be sure.

But one thing that will make it easier if you think of EVERY SINGLE GIRL you talk to ask practice.

Only by her showing significant and continued interest in you does she move from the “practice” to “potential relationship” category in your mind.

Keep this attitude and you’ll go far!

Why You’re NOT Broken

You Are Perfect

You And The World Are Perfect

Once upon a time, you had the world at your fingertips.

Perhaps you can remember now, what it’s like to dream big, and expect the dream to come true.

Big plans, goals, visions.

Of course, they are still there. If you take the time to reawaken them, you will.

They are just as strong now as they ever were.

It’s not that they weakened, or diminished in value. Only they were covered up.

By fears, worries, anxieties. A layer of protection that kept you safe.

Or you thought kept you safe.

Stuff you accepted from others. Stuff you thought you needed, but not any more.

However, you’re still carrying around a bunch of junk. A layer of gunk between the real you, and the world outside.

That’s why it’s hard to express yourself the way you really want.

That’s why it’s hard for others to see the real you, and appreciate your real value.

Most people don’t know this layer of gunk exists.

Some blame the world, some blame themselves.

If they only change the world, things will be better. Or if they only “fix” themselves, things will be better.

Of course, you can’t change the world. The world does what the world does. A huge evolving juggernaut of ever expanding reality that relentlessly moves forward.

You don’t need to change yourself, because you aren’t broken.

And there really is no “you” anyhow. Not that you’re a hallucination or anything. But the “you” is really ALWAYS changing and evolving and growing and learning.

Any definition of “you” is obsolete by the time you even think of the words.

How can you “fix” something that never stands still?

The ONLY thing that needs changing is that layer of gunk between you and the world.

That layer of gunk that was put there by well meaning but misinformed adults.

That layer of gunk you’re still carrying around.

Take in a deep breath, and blast away that junk once and for all.

Let loose your brilliance. Let in the world.

This will help:

Belief Change

The Myth Of The Quality Woman

Are You Chasing A Mythological Woman?

Myth Busting Relationships

What does it mean to find a “quality woman?”

Many guys are moaning all over the place that they don’t exist. Or at least not anymore. And many women feel the same thing about guys.

There’s a couple of things going on here.

One is that it’s very easy, and very simple for people to complain that it’s not like the “good old days.”

This doesn’t take any effort, and it requires no risk or potential failure. It’s just another manifesting of the age old argument that it’s the world’s fault that you can’t get what you want.

This is absolute hogwash. Even if it is true to a degree, this is a horrible mindset to take on. Once you start blaming the world, or your own “unique” situation, or whatever, for your lack, it’s pretty much all over.

Because if it’s somebody else’s fault you can’t get what you want, it’s also somebody else’s responsibility to give you what you want.

Sure, if you’re two years old and still happily crapping your pants, that might be a viable argument.

But as an adult, if you’re waiting for the magic pixie dust fairy to show up and grant your deepest wishes, you’ll be waiting a long, long time.

So idea number one is that if you can’t find what you’re looking for (ideal partner or not) you’re simply not looking hard enough.

Yea, it’s a tough world. Get over it. It’s always been a tough world, it will always be a tough world.

Next idea is the whole “quality woman” (or quality man) myth.

What does this mean? Some guys will say girls that are loyal, that will stand by you, that won’t cheat on you, etc.

But any girl that’s REALLY into you will show these qualities.

Unless she’s got some serious issues, a girl who’s head over heels in love with you is going to be loyal, she’s going to have your back, and she’s not going to cheat on you.

So if you’re meeting girls that don’t seem to fall into this category, guess what?

They simply aren’t feeling you.

Who’s fault is that?

Most likely, it’s nobody’s. No girl is obligated to fall for you. No girl is obligated to feel loyalty to you.

Your job, if you want a loyal girl, is to be the guy she wants to be loyal to.

Don’t sit around moaning about the state of the world.

Improve yourself. Enhance your career. Increase your social skills. Become comfortable being a laid back leader in social situations.

Choose a life for yourself that gets you out of bed every morning. 

Turn your life into a mission.

Do this, and you won’t have any problems with girls, or anything else.

The Quest For Mythical Love

Does True Love Really Exist?

It Really DOES Exist!

What is relationship “magic?”

Is it something that ONLY comes in Disney movies, or does it happen in real life?

Now, if you’re a guy, especially a jaded guy, bear with me.

Many guys think women need to be “gamed.” Meaning you need to see them as some secret combination that will only open when you say the right words and phrases in the right order.

Sure, this is an accurate metaphor, if you want to get laid. There are certain things that women (and men) respond to. Learn them well enough, and you can get laid, just like clockwork.

But if you’re after something more, then you’ve got to go beyond “game.”

As you may know, once you get past that initial lust, you may run out of material. Then the relationship will fizzle, and she’ll wonder what happened to that guy you met.

Imagine a girl that looks absolutely gorgeous, only when she wakes up the next morning, her face looks different (because all her makeup and contacts are gone) and her body looks different (because all those constricting undergarments are now removed). Her boobs are smaller (since she’s no longer wearing a push up bra) and you see the real color of her hair.

You’d feel you’d been conned. This is precisely the danger of over relying on “game.”

She’s going to eventually wake up next to a much different guy that she went to bed with.

The REAL YOU is going to show up sooner or later.

But what if you elevated the REAL YOU so that just by acting natural, you’d be much more attractive?

Here’s something else to consider, that may take a bit of brain power for some of you.

If you were to improve your all around personality, social skills and self confidence, something pretty cool will happen.

See, when you rely on game, it can start to feel “mechanical.” Do it enough times, and you start to “expect” her to respond a certain way. Pretty soon it loses its “magic.”

But when you’re acting “natural” you don’t feel like you’re running game. You’re just talking.

AND she’s getting more and more attracted to you.

Seeing a girl get fired up because of YOU is a much different, and much better feeling that seeing a girl get fired up because of “game technology.”

It feels more natural, it feels more organic, and it generally lasts a lot longer.

So, what’s holding you back? Why don’t you ALREADY do this?

Maybe you’ve been told that “being yourself” is a lie, only for beta chumps.

Maybe gurus have been flooding the interwebs with game language for so long they’ve forgotten one thing.

Men and women have been getting together, enjoying each others company, and STAYING together for over a hundred thousand years.

Improve your inner game, your life skills, and the women you want will follow.

Learn More:

mindpersuasion.com

Get Rid Of Approach Anxiety By Becoming The Sorter

They Pass Your Tests - Not The Other Way Around

See Beneath The Surface

Most guys are incredibly nervous when they approach girls. In fact, it can take years of practice to fully get over this.

And even guys who DO get over this, once they’re off the market for a while, their skills will go back to zero.

If you’ve ever been in a relationship for a while and then suddenly tried the market, you may have felt WAY out of your league.

Why is this?

One of the reasons is all of the assumptions that guys make about girls. Since guys are hard wired to be attracted primarily to looks, we assume that if she’s cute, then every other part of her is good also.

Which means when we walk over there, we assume that SHE already passes our “tests” and it’s completely up to us to pass her tests.

This is enough to give ANYBODY the jitters, no matter WHAT it is your doing.

Luckily, the part about her looks being “good enough” is absolutely false.

And here’s a way to prove it to yourself, AND get over your approach anxiety faster than you ever could just by pushing through them.

This will take some time, but you’ll be gaining an EXTRAORDINARY amount of experience, AND decreasing your levels of anxiety significantly.

Here’s what you do.

First, come up with some deal breakers. Either pure red flags, (according to you, nobody else) or things you’d rather she didn’t have.

This must be personality traits, habits, beliefs, things that will take a little bit of conversation to get to.

Smoking, a certain religion or political affiliation, cat person (or dog person) anything that you don’t imagine your “Dream Girl” of having.

Then, simply talk to girls LONG ENOUGH to disqualify them. Don’t get ANY numbers.

After you go through ten or twenty girls, you’ll have a sudden burst of realization.

That there’s MUCH more to girls than just their looks.

And that will absolutely DESTROY any feelings of “she’s perfect and I must qualify myself to her.”

ALL without getting any rejection.

Now, it’s important to have a friendly attitude while doing this. Don’t get angry, don’t put them down (out loud or in your mind). Just talk to them long enough until you get a red flag.

Then simply disqualify them IN YOUR MIND, politely end the conversation, and walk away.

Once you leave the mindset of the desperate beggar, and enter the mindset of the sorter, it will get much, much easier.

This Will Help:

mindpersuasion.com

Mind Tricks For Massive Confidence With Girls

How To Shift From Anxiety To Confidence In No Time

Flip Your Mental Switch

Here’s a great trick that will quickly boost your confidence.

You go somewhere where there’s plenty of cute girls to flirt with.

Someplace where people are out walking around is best. When you see a cutie coming your way, make eye contact and smile at her like she’s a friend. Like you know her.

While you are doing this, purposely remember a fun time you actually had with a cute girl. Nothing physical, just a fun conversation with a friend from school or work or something.

Nine times out of ten, she’ll smile back.  Even do a few double takes when you pass each other.

This is the perfect “energy” to have when out in public.

Most guys like girls, but they don’t know how to meet girls. For most guys, meeting girls just happens. Which means it always feels out of control.

And most guys like sex, but don’t get nearly as much as they want (if any lol).

You combine these two feelings, and whenever they see a cute girl they’d LIKE to get with, it brings up all kinds of negative feelings. Lack, being out of control, feeling alone, left behind, etc.

And sometimes these feelings morph into anger at the girl.

This is a natural human trait. We want something, and we can’t get it, so we blame the world. In this case the girl.

Now, it’s pretty obvious what will happen with this mindset. You’ll be looking at a girl with a mixture of lust, frustration, desperation and perhaps even a tinge of anger.

Not the kind of energy she’s looking for in a guy.

This, of course, will make it much harder to meet girls, which will increase those feelings. And this is a very hard trap to get out of.

So you’ve got to prime the pump, so to speak.

Hence the exercise described above.

The trick is to FORCE your brain to think of a happy, carefree spontaneous conversation you had with  a girl, no matter how long ago.

Then FORCE your brain to “pretend” the girl you’re looking at is an old friend. 

These two thoughts combined will get rid of those negative feelings and emotions long enough for her to notice your energy, and flash you an honest smile.

And when a cute girl flashes you an honest smile, and holds it, and even does a double take, it feels pretty good.

Try this out whenever you’re in a funk. Try and get five to ten good, honest smiles before talking to anybody.

It will not only put you in a good mood, but it will turn that negative self sustaining loop into a positive one.

Learn More Mind Tricks:

mindpersuasion.com

Take Your Brain on a Shopping Spree

Grab Whatever You Want

Take Anything You Want

Here’s a fun mind experiment.

You are at your favorite shopping mall. (Or department store, or supermarket or whatever).

You’ve got a shopping cart, and five minutes.

You can go to any store, and grab anything you want, and put it in your basket, for free.

No limitations.

What would you grab? Assuming you can’t sell anything, so you don’t just grab the most expensive stuff, what would you get?

This is a fun experiment to play with your friends, just to see what kinds of things they value.

But it’s also a good metaphor for the way we look at the world.

How so?

Our senses are being hit with millions of bits of information per second, but our conscious minds only handle a small fraction. Less than a hundred bits.

The stuff that’s important to us, like our names, money on the ground, a tiger that just escaped from the zoo, that stuff gets front row seats in our conscious minds.

The rest?

Straight into long term storage, most likely to never been seen again.

What kinds of things?

Those attractive people who are checking you out.

Those people that would be perfect for you to talk to and get some traction behind that idea of yours.

That bookstore or magazine stand that’s got the book or article that might send your career into a completely different direction, allowing you to make more money than you ever thought possible.

The trouble is that most of us never notice ANY of those things.

But it’s easy to “fine-tune” your mind, to see whatever you want to see.

Even better, you can create any set of ideas or beliefs you want, and train your mind to see PROOF of whatever you want.

Most people say they’ll believe it when they see it.

But as I’m sure you know, you’ve got to believe it FIRST, then you’ll start seeing it.

Granted, it’s not quick. It’s not as simple as mumbling some magic phrases.

But it is very easy. And it only takes a few minutes a day of private mental practice.

What would YOU like to believe?

The world really IS like that imaginary shopping mall with all the stuff.

You really CAN grab whatever you want.

Tune your brain, and it’s yours for the taking.

Learn How:

Belief Change

Stop Making Childish Excuses!

Get Out There And Get In The Mix!

Put On Your Big Boy Pants

It doesn’t take much effort find so called “game experts” bemoaning the state of male-female relationships these days.

If you dig beneath the surface, what many of these “gurus” are really teaching is a very complicated philosophical “proof” that is based on the oldest excuse in the book.

“It’s Not My Fault.”

Now, this is a very touchy subject. On the one hand, very few people had ideal childhoods. And it’s no secret that something as emotionally deep and powerful as male-female relationships is HIGHLY dependent on how well you were “raised” in this regard.

To be certain, those things that happened to you as a kid were absolutely NOT your fault.

But that’s not what I’m talking about.

I’m talking about guys who claim they can’t get laid, or find the ideal woman, or find WHATEVER they want, because of a variation of an age old argument that will simply not die.

“The World Is Broken.”

If you were to develop some invisible time machine that had a universal translator so you could travel around and listen in on various people belly aching about pretty much ANY kind of “lack,” you’d hear the same argument.

“It was much better in the good old days.”

“This generation has gotten a raw deal.”

“There just aren’t any X out there. I’ve looked.”

X can be jobs, girls, plots of land to build a cabin, places to prospect for gold, rocks to throw at zebras, you name it.

Why is this argument so popular?

Because it’s incredibly easy.

It takes no risk. It takes little mental effort. It’s very common so you’ll always have good company (misery loves company, eh?)

AND it protects you from taking risks, failing, or doing ANYTHING uncomfortable.

But guess what?

When it comes to girls, WHATEVER you want, you can get.

So long as you are willing to do what it takes to get it.

The strategy is simple.

Choose your criteria. Looks, personality, belief, religion, family background, etc.

Then simply start sorting.

AND realize that your dream girl must be attracted to you as much as you’ll be attracted to her.

Many guys miss this obvious point.

They think any kind of “work” they do is not dependent on her subjective desires.

Your job is to NOT ONLY find a girl who meets your criteria, but to meet a girl that thinks YOU meet HER criteria.

This, unquestionably, is a LOT of work.

And it’s understandable if you don’t want to put in that much work.

Just don’t kid yourself.

Don’t say, “The market sucks.” Or “There aren’t any quality women.”

At least do yourself the courtesy of telling yourself the truth:

“I probably could find my dream girl, but I’m too scared, and I’m too lazy.”

But if you really DO want to find her, (and you should because the benefits are better than ANYTHING on planet Earth), then get busy.

This Will Help:

mindpersuasion.com

True Alpha Behavior

Alphas Aren't Really Mean and Scary

Not What Most Guys Think

Many guys get stuck when girls try and “test” them.

If you read any forum related to getting girls, guys will post something she did or said, and ask:

“Was this a test?”

It can be confusing. You can be jamming along, everything’s groovy, and then suddenly she says or does something that doesn’t make any sense, and kind of puts you on the defensive.

When this happens, and it does, will and continue to happen, it generally IS a test.

Why do girls do this?

Girls don’t like guys for the same reasons guys like girls. Guys are much more into looks and physical beauty. This doesn’t mean that it’s the ONLY thing, but it’s a pretty important one.

Girls, on the other hand, are much less concerned with looks, and more concerned with personality. This, of course doesn’t mean that looks are COMPLETELY irrelevant to girls, but they’re not nearly as important as guys think they are.

So when a guy is checking out a girl, he knows right away if he’s attracted. She’s pretty, she’s got nice features, she’s dressed to kill. In about two seconds, the male attraction is fired up.

But when girls feel attraction, it doesn’t happen right away. She needs to be a lot more sure of his personality.

Since this has been true since the dawn of time, girls are hard wired to “test” a guy to make sure he can handle unexpected things.

No girl wants to hook her wagon to a guy who’s going to collapse into a butt-hurt little boy at the first sign of trouble.

So, how do you respond?

Think of it from her perspective. A evolutionary, biological perspective.

The whole purpose of her tests is to make sure he can handle adversity without being affected.

Which means you don’t get angry, you don’t try and “flip the script” and show her who’s boss.

The less her tests bother you, the better.

This is the REAL dominant alpha that girls respond to.

Not the kind who can yell and scream and act all tough and stoic and all of that other BS.

The guy who’s happy and content with himself and sure of himself and his abilities no matter WHAT happens.

Imagine you’re a caveman, and you’ve got a cave wife and a couple of cave kids following you down some dirt path.

If you come up to an obstacle, how do you respond?

If you’re her ideal caveman, you’ll simply say, “Hmm. An obstacle. Let’s go around it.”

If you’re a butt-hurt little cave boy, you’ll say, “This is so unfair! I didn’t sign up for this!”

Which guy do you think most girls would like to follow?

Build up your belief in yourself. Accept whatever she says as an opportunity to demonstrate your value by shrugging them off.

No big deal.

This will get her attracted to you faster than anything else.

More Mind Tools:

mindpersuasion.com

How To Find Your Dream Girl

Get Girls To Fall In Love With You

Step By Step Love Building

Most guys realize something pretty incredible when they start getting success with the ladies.

And that is that it’s not really as heavenly as they imagined.

Sure, it’s still a wonderful feeling to be with somebody special. Somebody who really gets you and has your back when you need it.

But it’s much more of a “two way street” than some guys imagine.

This is because there is a difference between getting something as a gift, and getting something in exchange.

Remember being a little kid, and getting birthday presents? Or any other present?

It feels good to get something. Something good. Something unexpected. Simply because.

That’s great if you’re a kid. And some guys apply this philosophy to girls. They act like they “deserve” something just “because.”

Like a little kid pounding his fists on the dinner table because there’s no ice cream.

“But You Promised!”

The only reason a girl will “give you” anything is because she’s getting something equally valuable from you.

And as tough as this is to hear, if you aren’t getting what you want from girls, then you don’t have much to offer, at least from their perspective.

No pretty girl, who gets plenty of attention from guys, is going to look across the room at some guy, and just spontaneously decide to walk over and give him the goods.

Girls just aren’t wired that way.

They like being approached. They like being talked to in a special way. They like to feel special feelings. 

And if a guy can consistently make them feel those special feelings, she’ll be more than willing to give back.

Now, it’s absolutely crucial that NONE of this happens on a conscious level. It’s not like trading baseball cards with your buddies.

Your behavior has to trigger those feelings. And those feelings in her will trigger her behavior that then triggers those feelings in you.

To get, you’ve got to give. But not like most guys think they’re “giving.”

How will you know when you’re “giving” correctly? She’ll be responding correctly. Body language, pupil dilation, lip color, skin color, percent of the time she’s looking at you and not gazing around the room.

Now, this requires a lot of practice. A lot of times you’ll go over and talk to her, and nothing will happen.

But if you talk to enough girls, you’ll see that just being you will be enough to get certain girls into you.

Then you just keep focusing on those until you find one you like who likes you.

Now, like I mentioned before, once you get to this level, it’s pretty mechanical. You’ll start to lose that “magic feeling” when a girl looks at you a special way.

You may even feel like you’re wasting your time. After all, you’ll find that if you talk to ten girls a night, you’ll get at least a couple who are interested in you.

You’ve stopped looking for unexpected “presents” and you’ve entered the grown up world of relationship creation.

Which means you can literally design your perfect dream girl, in every way, and then simply go out and find her.

Get Started Now:

mindpersuasion.com