Category Archives: Charisma

How To Make Life Purr Like A Kitten

Slice Through Resistance Like Butter

Rev Up Your Life

What’s a chainsaw and a racecar have in common?

Other than they both make a lot of noise?

Both are designed to be more efficient at higher RPM’s. Or the faster the engine goes, the more effective it is.

If you listen to a chainsaw when it’s not cutting, when it’s kind idling, it sounds pretty rough and almost like something’s wrong with it.

But when you rev it up, it purrs like a kitten. (Not a kitten you’d want to pet, but you get the idea.)

If you’ve ever had one of those days when everything just “clicks” you know what that feels like.

All the lights are green, you get all the parking spaces up close. All the people you smile at smile right back (and some even smile first).

This is the way life is SUPPOSED to be.

When we are on purpose, when we humans have a solid goal, not just fort the next couple of days, but for life in general, it’s a lot easier to “click.” 

You’re humming along just like a chainsaw, slicing through all obstacles in your path.

If you DON’T have any idea of what you’re creating in life, it can feel like you’re running in circles.

You try one thing, it works for a while, then it falls to pieces. Then maybe something else, but you get the same result. You start off like gangbusters, but as soon as you run into trouble, it gets hard to find your mojo.

It’s easy to let your goals and direction be chosen by somebody else.

In fact, the way society is built, it takes an almost gargantuan effort to avoid being led around like a lost puppy.

Back in the old days, all you needed were your instincts, and you’d be fine. A desire for some kind of income, a desire for some kind of relationships, and some safety, and you were good.

But today you MUST choose. Not in extreme detail, just enough to give yourself some direction.

If you were wandering across the desert, for example, and you had zero idea where you were going, it’d be easy to wander in circles until you were buzzard food.

On the other hand, if you had a clear destination in mind, you’d have a much better chance.

Once you’ve got a clear direction pulling you forward, you’ll be much more “in tune” with what’s going on.

This Will Help:

Self Confidence Generator

Is Your Inner Caveman Holding You Back?

Give Your Rational Mind A Chance

Leave Your Instincts Behind

Society is filled with paradoxes and contradictions.

A lot of them are simply because we are living in modern societies with caveman brains.

Our mind / body system was developed to live within groups of 200-300 people. Which can lead to problems in a society with hundreds of millions.

One idea is that we can hold about 200-300 people in our brain. Not necessarily their names, but their faces and how we interact with them. 

Like that girl you normally interact with down at the coffee shop. You see her outside of the coffee shop,  you would recognize her. Not necessarily from where, but you would see her face, feel that emotional signal of recognition.

Once you start going outside that 200-300 limit, it starts to get fuzzy. You start thinking you recognize people, when you really don’t.

Another holdover is our deep fear of being socially ostracized. Back in our caveman days, if we felt socially threatened, that was a HUGE and potentially life threatening issue.

So we developed all kinds of deep ninja emotions that kept us on guard of our social “health.”

Even a weird look, or seeing people talking in whispers would sound off alarm bells. 

Maybe they’re talking about us! Maybe the tribe is plotting something behind our back! Maybe we’re in big trouble!

These issues still plague us today. If you see a couple of people looking at you and whispering, you’ll immediately assume their talking trash about you.

Most people WOULDN’T assume they thought you were the most amazing person ever, and they were strategizing how to get on your good side.

The good news is these ancient social instincts can be overridden.

With a little bit of mental practice, you can ditch those old social fears, and grab the self confidence to do anything.

Imagine what you could do if you had ZERO social fear. If you could walk up and talk to that interesting stranger (who was super sexy or a potential super rich business partner) and talk to them as comfortably and fearlessly as an old buddy from kindergarten?

Imagine if you could stand up in a crowd of strangers, instantly command their attention and respect, and express your ideas in the best possible way.

This is your potential.

This is what happens when you leave your caveman instincts behind.

Are you ready?

Are You Ready To Leave The Pack?

Leave The Crowd Behind

Go You Own Way

Long time ago, I went on a backpacking trip in Scotland.

I was coming from the States, and was meeting a buddy of mine in some train station I’d never been to, next to some big clock, which was a popular meeting place.

I was coming from Southern California, and he was coming from Texas.

It seemed simple enough on paper, but the logistics were pretty complicated.

Especially since I hadn’t really planned HOW I was going to get there. I was just going to “wing it” as I went.

My first “test” came in getting from the London airport to the London train station to the Glasgow train station.

Luckily, there were enough other people who were leaving the airport, via bus, to the train station.

So I didn’t really need to do much thinking. A mix of following the signs, and following the crowd.

Mostly following the crowd.

When I finally arrived smack dab in the middle of Glasgow, I didn’t really remember much of how I got there.

I’m sure you’ve had similar experiences. It seems that humans are hard wired on a deep level to simply forget themselves, and go with the flow.

In fact, up until the recent past (and I mean the RECENT past) humans have done pretty good to kind of just “go with the flow.”

Go to school, show up every day, do your homework like you’re told, pick a college, send out some resumes, get a job, show up on time, do what you’re told, and you can make enough money to live a pretty good life.

In a sense, our entire society is built so we don’t have to do much “thinking.”

You may have to stop and look at a couple signs on the way, but then you just get right back in the shuffle.

And for many people, this is perfectly fine. So long as you’ve got enough extra cash left over every month to buy some nice things, it’s all good, right?

Only that way of living is quickly coming to a close.

For whatever reason, just following the crowd, and doing what you’re told is no longer good enough.

In fact, if that’s ALL you did, there’s a good chance you’d end up in a pretty bad place.

Now more than ever, it’s up to each and every one of us to wake up and see what’s going on.

NOT to to be super heroes and save society or anything corny like that, but to simply save ourselves.

Because as I’m sure you know, NOBODY is going to do this for you.

A really scary thought to be sure. But also incredibly liberating once  you fully accept it.

Once you break out of the “follow the crowd” mindset, there’s really not much you can’t do.

If enough people like you start doing that, it may very well save society.

Why I Screamed My Brains Out

Kill Fear With A Bang

How To Quickly Kill Fear

If you’ve ever done any public speaking, you know a common trick is to look at people’s foreheads, or the tops of their heads.

This avoids some of the anxiety that comes from staring into a bunch of eyes staring back.

Another trick is to visualize everybody really happy after your speech, to give you a bit more confidence when you start.

Yet another trick is to start off with a bang, some kind of joke, or controversial statement.

I remember once I was going through toastmasters, and I was giving a speech on fear. What it is, how it’s represented, what’s real what’s not etc.

I started off by screaming at the top of my lungs for about five seconds.

I didn’t say that I was going to that. I just walked up, glanced down at my 3×5 cards as if I were about to start regular speech, and then let ‘er rip.

The funny part was that this was in a bookstore, where they have those coffee shops and a big area where people can sit. Some people thought it was pretty funny, some people got pretty angry.

But it certainly DESTROYED any nerves I had before speaking.

Now, I’m not recommending that you scream at the top of your lungs before starting anything that may cause some anxiety.

But what this DOES illustrate is that there are many mental “tricks” you can do that will help you overcome any fear.

Now, some of these are short term tricks, and some are long term strategies.

One of the BEST ways to obliterate fear is to create some very POWERFUL dreams that you are moving toward.

They don’t need to be concrete, or specific. Just something you know you’re moving toward. It’s also a good idea to choose one big thing in each area of life.

That way, no matter WHAT you are doing,  it will be easy to see it in the larger context.

Giving a speech can be pretty scary. But giving a speech KNOWING that it’s part of a skill building process that will get you a TON of money in the future will make it a lot less scary.

Especially when you’re ONLY focused on some “small” aspect of speaking, like using less “uh’s” or looking at the audience a larger percentage of the time.

Whenever you can see anything as a small step in a larger process, you’ll see it for what it is.

Not a “do or die” situation that’s going to make or break your existence.

Simply one small step on your road to inevitable success.

To learn how to do this on a deep level, check this out:

Had Enough TV Yet?

Start Your Journey

Answer Your Calling

One common theme among many movies is the “reluctant hero” idea.

Some normal guy or girl is hanging out, and suddenly something happens.

They don’t have a choice to “step up” and do something magnificent.

And often, they have a choice between using their new “power” for good or for evil.

Since these are movies, or stories with a “meaning,” the hero usually chooses the path of righteousness instead of evil.

But in real life, that is all from certain.

When I was a kid, I’d used to complain to my parents.

“I didn’t ask to be born!”

This is one of the reasons we identify with all the movie and story heroes that are “called” rather than people who consciously decide to become heroes.

None of us asked to be here. (At least not in this plane of existence.)

But here we are.

The BIG question is, what are you going to do about it?

Many folks (who have decided to use their powers for selfish purposes) would rather you NOT discover who you really are.

They would MUCH rather that part of you stays hidden, and you live a life of “quiet desperation.”

Unfortunately, most people are happy to comply.

Sure, they complain that life sucks. That they are always broke. That they never catch any breaks.

Then they proceed to tear open another bag of Cheetos and see what those crazy Kardashians will do next.

The bottom line is that because you are reading this now, there’s something inside of you that knows something’s fishy.

That there’s something more to TV, fast food, and the ever popular finger-pointing blame game.

Once again, what are you going to do about it?

It’s scary to leave your safe comfort zone behind.

But outside of your comfort zone is where all the good stuff is.

The REALLY good stuff, that most people only see on TV.

Will you go after it?

It’s not easy, it’s far from guaranteed, and it ain’t quick.

But you didn’t show up here to live the easy life. The safe life. The TV life.

You showed up here to achieve something MAGNIFICENT.

What are you waiting for?

Have You Started Your Hero’s Journey?

Are You Thinking Like A Robot?

Think For Yourself

Long time ago I had this job as a telemarketer.

It only lasted about a week, because I absolutely hated it, but the training was pretty insightful.

Not in learning any kind of useful skills, but the mindset of the guy who put together the whole thing.

This was during the early 2000’s when real estate was booming. The job was to sell this marketing package to real estate agents.

But the way the trainer (and founder) described these people was pretty horrible.

His opinion was that people have no real control of their thinking, and if you only push a few buttons, it’s easy to get them to do whatever you want.

That guy had an incredibly low opinion of his customers.

Before every shift, he’d get everybody in this one room to “pump us up” and build up some story that we were giving these poor customers some life or death information.

If you’ve seen the movie “The Wolf of Wall Street,” it was very similar to that.

The truth is that there are a LOT of people like that.

People who have low regard for their customers, and who see all of us as easy marks, just desperate to buy the next “thing.”

Unfortunately, the only reason they think that is because it works.

Most of us are TERRIFIED of thinking for ourselves. We would much rather be told what to do, even if it’s some kind of con, than try and figure it out on our own.

But if you’re honest with yourself, you know that is the biggest con of all.

That inside you is a literal HERO just waiting to come up.

But if you continue to expect others to tell you what to do, step by step, that HERO is going to stay hidden.

And when I say “hero” I’m not talking dressing up and fighting crime, or flying around with a cape.

I’m talking about REAL LIFE heroes. The kind build things, invent things, create things that other people desperately need.

The kind that aren’t afraid to express themselves without concern social pressure or “what others will think.”

The kind of folks that society NEEDS to keep functioning.

One of the main goals of the hero is to FIND the journey.

Not to be told what to do, or how to do it, or how to stay safe.

Your purpose in life is to not only unleash your inner hero, but to be the one who defines their journey.

Where you are going, and how you will get there.

Are you ready?

This will help:

Self Confidence Generator

Is Life Really One Big Scam?

Anybody Got A Left Handed Bacon Stretcher?

How To Out-Con The Conners

I remember a long time ago, when I was in boy scouts, we had this crazy game we’d play.

It was only when we had these once a year “Jamborees” where hundreds of troops would get together and have all these competitions.

We’d all have our camps set up in this big huge circle around the competition area, which was at least a square mile.

The game was unspoken, but understood by all the different troops. Everybody would take their newest members, and send them out looking for something that didn’t exist.

My favorite was a “left handed bacon stretcher.”

The kids would go from troop to troop, and ask if they had one. The guy who answered the question would say, “No, we don’t, but I’m pretty sure that troop 634 has one.” And that troop would be the furthest away.

Now, the reason I thought this game was so fun was not in conning younger scouts. It was fun because me and my buddy would pretend to BE younger scouts going around asking for the craziest thing, and seeing how far we could push the envelope.

It was pretty fun, at least as kids, to pretend to be the “mark” while all the other guys, at least in our minds, were the “marks.”

Of course, this “game” doesn’t stop once we get older.

It seems that everybody is telling us half truths, and then happily sending us on our way, usually far, far away, so by the time we figure the jig is up, that other guy is long gone.

This partially stems from the fact that few people are comfortable saying, “I don’t know,” so they make up some half baked answer so they don’t feel stupid, and then send you away with only a partial answer.

Another reason this happens is many people are desperate to claim some kind of social status by giving you some convoluted answer, usually having nothing to do with your original question.

Politicians pull this crap all the time. Somebody asks them a question they either can’t answer, or don’t want to answer, so they simply spin it off into something else, which makes them look good, but ignores the original question.

What’s the answer?

Unfortunately, it’s ultimately up to you.

Which means few people will give you the straight dope. Few people will put their own social status aside to help you out.

Few people will tell you how it really is.

It’s up to YOU to take pretty much everything with a grain of salt, and kind of figure it out on your own, from experience.

Most people don’t like to hear this. Most people hate that it’s like this.

But the truth is that once you accept this for what it is, and why it is this way, life can be pretty fun.

Like like my buddy and I when we were kids, you can turn the whole “con” into your own game, where you can get the upper hand.

This will help:

Self Confidence Generator

Are You Afraid Of Non-Barking Invisible Dogs?

Only In Your Mind

Do Imaginary Fears Rule Your Life?

Once, way back in high school, I came up against fear, and the fear won.

Me and my buddy had been watching some vids, and drinking a few beers.

His parents were out of town, and there these houses being constructed nearby.

We’d decided we would go check them out. They were just frames at this point.

It was night, and very windy. We were walking through this skeleton neighborhood, when we saw this “shape” off in the distance.

In all likelihood, it was a pile of lumber that had a tarp tied down over it. But in the dead of night, with the wind howling, we imagined it was a huge mean guard dog. (Why it didn’t bark didn’t come up in our terrified high school minds).

Instead of going to check it out, we talked ourselves into going back to the safety of the couch and the TV.

We told each other stories why it wasn’t a good idea to be out anyway. Why it was better to stay safely in familiar territory, rather than explore the scary unknown.

We convinced ourselves that going back to finish watching whatever videos we’d rented (filled with predictable plot lines where the heroes safely beat the bad guys) was the logical choice. 

The good choice. The right choice.

But the reality was that we simply came up against an unknown. We turned that unknown into something horrible, in our mind, and refused to face it.

We decided it was better to embrace a known safety, made up by somebody else (the videos) than to face an unknown risk, made up by our own minds.

This is very, very common. We humans do it all the time. We convince ourselves we’re doing the right thing. The logical thing. 

But are we?

Nobody got rich by taking the safest path. Nobody built a business by avoiding risk. Nobody ever created a wonderfully fulfilling relationship by avoiding potential rejection.

Of course, we were just kids, out exploring. We weren’t looking for hidden treasure or secret love.

But you’d be surprised how often those things show up out of nowhere.

Love, money, employment, friends, relationships. None of these really show up exactly how we think they will.

Which means in order to really get the good stuff in life, we’ve always got to be open.

Hard to do when you turn tail and run at the first sign of trouble, like me and my buddy.

What about you?

Are you ready to embrace risk, uncertainty, and potential setbacks?

Or would you rather stay where it’s safe and predictable?

If you’re ready to move forward, this will help:

The Best Girl Problem To Have

When You Come To A Fork In The Road - Take It!

Should You Stay Or Should You Go?

Most guys would love to find a happy attractive girl to call their own. And be the happy attractive guy the girl calls her own.

Yet many guys run into all kinds of trouble when figuring out how to make that happen.

From a structural level, it’s pretty simple. First, figure out what you’re looking for. Looks, personality, family background, religion, politics, etc. Make a list of deal-makers and deal-breakers.

Once you’ve got a reasonable list, start sorting. 

How do you sort? 

Talk to any girl you see who might fit your criteria. Of course, one of your criteria MUST be that she be attracted to you, or else what’s the point?

Otherwise it’d be like trying to buy something that you simply can’t afford.

Now, if you did this, a couple of interesting things would happen.

You may start off realizing that your game absolutely sucks. Meaning that every single girl you talk to looks like she’s about to call the cops.

Now, at this point, two things would happen. You COULD decide women are all bitches, join your local MGTOW group and start building models or something.

OR you could decide to improve your game.

How?

This is the beauty of human behavior. You don’t really need to know how. All you need to know is what you did didn’t work. So all you’ve got to do is do something different.

Start with different openers, or ice breakers. Change your clothes. Wear a different cologne. Anything.

And pretty soon you’ll start to notice small improvements. More and more girls will be interested in you. And some will begin to meet your criteria.

This is when something else pretty cool happens. The more skills you develop, the tighter your criteria will be.

A guy who’s never even kissed a girl will have completely different criteria than a guy that talks to and dates a whole range of women.

As your experience, confidence, and skill set grows, as will your criteria.

And pretty soon you’ll come to a very NICE problem to have.

Should you KEEP improving yourself, or should you pick ONE girl and stick with her?

Only you can answer that. But it’s certainly a nice problem to have.

But you’ll NEVER run into this problem if you remove yourself from the game completely.

How long should you spend going through this process?

Well, think about the benefits. A partner for life who will have your back through thick and thin, and you hers.

Don’t rush the process. Take your time. 

Enjoy your life, enjoy your skills. And enjoy the game.

Should You Go Your Own Way?

Do You Really Want To Give Up A Chance of Intimacy?

Be Careful Of Rash Decisions

Many men these days have voluntarily taken themselves out of the game.

And that’s a shame. Because getting together with a girl who’s into you as much as you are into her is a feeling matched by no other.

Unfortunately, it’s getting harder and harder to create that “special relationship.”

Or is it?

The human mind is incredibly complex and has all kinds of programmed thinking routines, most of them subconscious, to protect the ego.

One of those is the “sour grapes” mindset. You see something you want, but you can’t get it, so you convince yourself that you don’t want it.

This is easy to do, and it’s essential.  Since by very nature, (and economic law) humans are hard wired to have unlimited wants, yet we live in a world where things are scarce.

Which means we’ll necessarily want things that we can’t get. That is simply baked into the cake of life on Earth.

Now, throughout the long course of evolution, Mother Nature has made it easy on us.

Think of it this way. If we had to spend our lives chasing things that we wanted, but mostly couldn’t get, that would suck. Really suck.

In fact, there was probably a race of cavemen way back in the day that went after animals, couldn’t get them, and then moped around for days, or even weeks.

Since those guys never got laid, and didn’t get a chance to pass on those “we suck” genes, those dudes were eliminated from the gene pool.

So here we are, a couple hundred thousand years later, easily able to con ourselves.

“Did you get that girls number?”

“No, but she smokes, and she seems like a bitch.”

“Wow man, you really dodged a bullet!”

That way, we can make an easy recovery, and quickly set our sites on the next target.

Unless we give up completely.

It’s one thing to convince ourselves that any particular woman is undesirable (in order to protect our ego from the pain of rejection) but it’s something else completely to convince ourselves that ALL WOMEN are undesirable.

Now, aside from any economic arguments (divorce, child support, etc), you still can find some women that fit your criteria, so long you don’t give up.

To be sure, meeting girls shouldn’t be the number one priority in your life. But the idea of meeting women shouldn’t be off the table completely.

So long as you’ve got some solid criteria, as well as some decent sorting and qualifying skills, you won’t run into too much trouble.

After all, having options is much better than not having options.

And if you remove yourself from the dating pool completely, you are pretty much cutting off the option of meeting a nice lady to keep you happy for any span of time.

Just something to consider.

mindpersuasion.com