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Learn Secret Skills Nobody Knows

Many people believe that NLP is a myth.

A “pseudo-science.”

Some kind of snake oil scam.

And for most people, it is.

That is actually GOOD NEWS.

This is how it’s generally taught.

Somewhere along the line, the idea popped up that NLP could be “unconsciously installed” into people.

That all you had to do was sit in a seminar and sort of “soak” up the ideas and techniques.

When you finished, you took a VERY EASY test, and received your NLP certificate.

The VAST MAJORITY of NLP “Practitioners” and “Trainers” have gone through this kind of “training.”

This is how people “experience” NLP.

They hear somebody talk about it.

They do a few exercises in the seminar room, and BAM!

Everybody’s a “practitioner.”

But consider learning something else like that.

Say, a martial art.

Suppose you took a two week course in martial arts.

And they actually gave you a black belt, after giving you a VERY EASY test.

How confident would you be in your “fighting” abilities?

Or how about playing a musical instrument?

Suppose you took a two week intensive course on songwriting.

And before this “music practitioner course” you didn’t know ANYTHING about music.

What would your musical skills be AFTER this two week seminar?

Clearly, when learning skills like music or martial arts, we instinctively know it will take a LONG TIME to learn them.

But something that is MORE COMPLICATED (human communication) we somehow think we can become “master practitioners” after a couple of weeks.

Is it any wonder that most folks think that NLP is a pseudo science?

But here’s the good news.

Not only is NLP EXTREMELY POWERFUL, but you don’t need to learn it from a seminar.

The actual techniques are very simple.

But they take PRACTICE.

And just like anything else, the more you practice, the better you’ll get.

Now, if it’s important to have a “certificate” that says you’ve got some kind of cool skills, that’s one thing.

But if you WANT the actual SKILLS, then you can get started today.

Because if you take just a few minutes a day of mental practice, pretty soon you will have MORE skills than even the most famous NLP Trainers.

So instead of running around talking about NLP, you can USE NLP to create a magnificent life.

And you don’t need to tell anybody.

Get Started:

NLP Mind Magic

How To Go Infinitely Meta

Being able to go meta is a good skill to have.

This is the main reason why couples go to counseling.

It’s not because the counselor has gone to an ultra-classified school where the true secrets of relationship success were revealed.

And by visiting these esteemed counselors, they find out the inside scoop on how to REALLY make a relationship work.

The reason people go to counselors is to have an independent (as much as that’s possible) third party keep things objective.

The counselor serves as the “meta” view of the relationship.

Sometimes, though, this is troubling. What if this “meta” view is biased?

A recent study showed that when people go to a medical doctor (who is supposed to know what’s what) and then get a second opinion, EIGHTY PERCENT of the time, the second opinion of the second doctor was different than the first.

But the ability to “go meta” in any way is helpful. If we had enough resources, we could get lots of “meta opinions” and then take an average of something.

Luckily, unless you have a strange lump and you can’t “go meta” on yourself, you CAN go meta in a lot of other situations.

This is a skill that you can practice.

For example, if you are talking to somebody, when it’s there turn to talk, try and see yourself from an objective third person position, while they are talking to you.

Many people do this without really thinking about it.

If you are the type to write yourself a “to do” list every morning, it’s kind of the same thing.

One view of yourself is the writer of the list. Then later in the day, you the, “fulfiller of the list,” is in a slightly different viewpoint.

(Of course, if you’re at the supermarket and you can’t read your writing, you can’t really call yourself to ask what you meant…)

One way being meta is very helpful is how you pick up data, information and skills.

You can approach the data, skills or information as the “learner.”

Or you can step back and see yourself as the “learner” while the “meta you” is learning how to learn.

This takes being your own coach to an entirely different level.

Most people don’t even think of terms of “learning how to learn.”

It’s one of those things we just “do.” Like walking and talking.

But as you well know, there’s spitting out a bunch of gibberish, and then there’s skillful communication, where you eloquently put together strings of words that can move people’s emotions on deep levels.

If you can do that by “learning how to talk” imagine what you can do when you learn how to learn.

Click Here To Learn How

Re Train Your Monkey Brain

There was a magical shift in our thinking, long time ago.

According to an Economist.

When we think of doing something NOW, that’s called “present good.”

When we think of doing something in the FUTURE, that’s called “future good.”

The shift happened when early humans learned to IMAGINE a “future good” in the “present,” thereby turning into a “present good.”

For example, let’s say you would like to eat some ice cream, RIGHT NOW.

But you also have a goal of losing weight, six months from now.

Now, you COULD, eat the ice cream now, and say you’ll get started on the diet TOMORROW. (You’ve never done this, right?)

Or you COULD take some time to imagine that FUTURE GOOD (you’re future body) SO MUCH, that it becomes MORE DESIRABLE, as you imagine it in the present (making it a “present good”) than eating the ice cream.

This is what that Economist thought happened to people as they slowly changed from hunter-gatherers (let’s go find something we can eat NOW), into farmers (let’s do work TODAY so we’ll have a CRAPLOAD of easy food in six months).

This REALLY kicked into high gear when any particular society had done this for a few years.

Because of the work in the PAST, they had food TODAY. Enough to last until the food in six months was ready.

Now, who in their right mind, when getting food is easy as planting seeds and waiting, would run after some scary animal and try to kill it?

Needless to say, once EVERYBODY turned into farmers, that’s when societies took off. Governments, laws, massive irrigation systems, running water in or near EVERY HOUSE.

Obviously, that was just the start. That event (the thinking “trick” of DELAYED GRATIFICATION) led to EVERYTHING we have today.

And you can use that SAME thinking trick to train yourself how to take the daily action needed to be able to create ANYTHING.

Fantastic relationships, interesting careers, million dollar skills.

How do you do this?

Every time you think about doing something in the future, there’s a potential BAD outcome and a potential GOOD outcome.

Unfortunately our monkey brains automatically will think of the BAD outcome, and keep you from taking action.

But with proper practice, and some reasoned thought when thinking about taking action, you can take that potential GOOD outcome, and make it BIGGER (in your mind) than that potential BAD outcome.

There are MANY ways to do this.

And with practice, ANY ACTION you’d like to take (giving a powerfully persuasive speech, talking to a super sexy person, explaining to your boss why it’s in HIS or HER best interest to give you a raise), will FEEL GOOD rather than scary.

Learn More:

Fearless

The Exchange Model of Communication

There’s a pretty interesting procedure in NLP called “Integration of Parts.”

Basically it’s a hallucination where you create a “dialogue” between two “parts.”

Like if “part of you” wants to get out and meet people, but another “part of you” wants to stay home and watch TV.

You bring them both out, and literally talk to them (and hear their responses) as if you were having a negotiation between two physical entities.

The idea is to keep “going up the logical level” of each of their “desires” (going out and staying in) until they both realize they want the same thing.

Then you can work on coming up with a better strategy to get that need met, rather than having inner conflict.

The reason it works is if you take any “criteria” for why we want to do something, and you’ll end up with a hard to describe “feeling” that can be equated pretty easily with any other hard to describe “feeling.”

Like you buy a car because you want to get to point A to point B. But you buy a certain car for certain reasons (safety, looking cool, feeling good, etc).

Good salespeople know to respectfully find these “higher order criteria” so that they more easily fulfill them.

If you want car that has a 350 cc engine and gets 22 MPG, that’s going to be harder to satisfy than a car that makes you “feel safe.”

When talking to people for personal reasons (e.g. not selling them anything). The same strategies apply.

You don’t exactly walk up to a stranger and ask them what they’re looking for in a new acquaintance.

But knowing those criteria are ALWAYS there will help a lot.

Whenever people are meeting each other socially, we all have pretty much the same criteria.

We want our ideas to be heard and respected. We want our wants, needs, and fears validated.

We don’t want to be told our ideas are silly or foolish.

We’d all rather talk about things we want, rather than we don’t want.

Looking at social interactions as negotiations is a bit strange.

But if you keep it on the down low, and always give them something before you expect something back, you’ll have a lot more success.

AND you’ll find that talking to people is a lot easier, when you’re using the “give first” mindset.

You’ll be remembered more, and you’ll be thought of in a much better light.

Doesn’t matter if you’re making friends, looking for lovers, finding new business contacts, or just passing the time.

See every conversation as some kind of “exchange,” and give before you get.

You can learn how, and a lot more here:

Interpersonal Resonance

Powerful Mental Skills

When I was younger, I used to do a lot of backpacking.

It kind of forced you to be very careful when choosing what to bring.

Some things were AWESOME to have with you, but they were heavy.

So you had to spend a lot of time choosing.

Since you’re carrying all your stuff on your back for a week or so, you want to make sure it’s not weighing you down.

Once I had to take my then girlfriend to the airport. I showed up at her house and she had three HUGE bags.

Clearly, everything has its advantages and disadvantages.

This goes with pretty much everything.

Even the basics of human biology has costs. Sure, it’s great to get energy from food. But finding it can suck, especially if you’re a caveman. And you’re being chased by a tiger and you have to stop use the caveman toilet, it’s not so convenient.

In economics they have something called an “opportunity cost.” Which means whenever you decide to do something, you’re subconsciously choosing to NOT do a bunch of other things.

You can go out and hang with your friends, but you might miss out on some amazing TV shows!

You could agree to an exclusive relationship with that girl or guy you’ve been seeing, but that means that EVERYBODY else on earth is off limits.

You could buy that cheeseburger for $2, but that means you’re also deciding that everything else on earth that’s also $2 is not what you want.

Of course, when you’re eating that delicious cheeseburger, you’re not focusing on what you DON’T have, you’re focusing on what you DO have.

If our brains weren’t pretty good at this, we’d NEVER be able to decide anything.

Then again, a lot of times we over think things. Instead of focusing on a positive outcome, or even a likely outcome, we allow our caveman brains to come up with the WORST outcome, and then use THAT, however UNLIKELY it is, to define our actions.

That’s the problem with having such quick thinking brains. Sure, they help us decide lickity-split, but we can also send ourselves on horrible mental loops.

Being able to manage your own brain, and manage the thoughts you think and HOLD is a POWERFUL skill to have.

For example, what if you were to imagine the BEST POSSIBLE outcome when you were considering doing ANYTHING, and you had the skill to ONLY think about THAT? Would that make taking action a lot easier?

Of course it would!

This is the power of holding a frame. Of not being knocked off balance by reality, other people, or even your inner caveman (or cavewoman).

It IS a skill, which means you MUST practice.

But when you do, you’ll be pretty pleased with yourself.