Tag Archives: Emotions

Click With Anybody

How To Click With Nearly Anybody

The idea of resonance has always been a favorite of mine.

Even as a kid, when I didn’t know what it was.

Me and my friends learned how to shake street signs.

If you push it back and forth at the right frequency, you can get some pretty huge oscillations.

Much bigger than you’d be able to push on your own.

Being a kid and leveraging some principle of science to create an effect seemingly impossible is pretty cool.

The same happens when people “click” with one another.

Most of the time we stumble through life, just trying randomly.

So when that “click” does happen, it’s extra special.

Because it’s “scarce” it seems to be more valuable than it really is.

Scarcity does that.

But this presents a problem, one we really don’t realize.

Because we perceive those situations (where we “click” with others) as “scarce” we tend to hang onto them LONGER than we should.

Luckily, this won’t happen once we realize that feeling of “scarcity” is only in our mind.

Once you learn how to CREATE that “click” feeling, the scarcity goes away.

And will make those “click” situations MUCH BETTER.

Normally, when we start to “click” with somebody we are both worried and ecstatic at the same time.

Happy it’s happening, but worried because it’s scarce.

And scarce things tend to stay that way.

So not only do we hang on for dear life, we tend to do things not to ENHANCE that “click” feeling, but protect it.

We don’t want to ruin a good thing.

But once you learn how to create that click feeling in a majority of the people you interact with, a couple of things will happen.

One is because they won’t be scarce, you can relax and enjoy them.

Two is because you’ll be relaxing and enjoying the situation, the other person will “resonate” with you.

This is what people do.

We vibe with one another.

If YOU are nervous, so will the other person.

IF you are relaxed and enjoying yourself, so will the other person.

This requires that you stop HOPING it will happen, and learn how to MAKE it happen.

Once you do, you’ll have a skill few people even know exist.

Learn How:

Hypnotic Storytelling

Emotions Are Awesome

Escape The Rigid Hierarchy

I watched a pretty goofy movie the other night on Netflix.

It was a romantic comedy, and the “hero” was a salesperson for a big drug company.

They had them memorize a sales pitch, and they had to practice saying it while holding a lit match.

The idea was to finish before the match burned out.

And in order to “close” doctors (they people they were selling to) they had to hide out in the parking lot and wait for them to pull in.

Then they’d run up and hammer out their sales pitch.

When you’re selling like that, it’s clearly a number’s game.

It’s about as cold as you can get.

Meaning the customer (in this case doctors) have no idea you’re there. Then you show up out of nowhere and start pounding them with “features and benefits” in twenty seconds or less.

This is the model of almost all sales, even with warm customers.

You walk into a shop, and your sort of interested, but they still use the same technique.

They take a bunch of pre-set, memorized ideas, and try to FORCE them into your head.

This is precisely why sales is high tension, and high turnover.

Few people can handle that much “confrontation” for very long.

Why is it like this?

All the way up the food chain, it’s the same way.

The upper managers (in the movie and in real life) train the salespeople.

The sales people are told EXACTLY what to say, and then they turn around and repeat it to the customer.

A very tight chain of command.

There’s no room for dissent, no room for discussion.

The ideas are created at the higher level.

Then they are “implanted” into lower level minds (salespeople) who go out and forcibly try and “implant” them into the customers minds.

This is what happens when people aren’t allowed any independent thought.

The ideas come down from the top, and that’s the way it is.

Whoever gets those ideas (in this case the memorized sales pitch) into the most minds gets the most money.

Of course, it doesn’t HAVE to be that way.

You can be an independent thinker.

And independent idea creator, not only in YOUR mind but in the minds of people you are talking to.

When you’re going from the top down, it’s ALWAYS about content.

But when you’re an independent operator, a freelance “thinker,” you can start with the emotions.

And give your listeners the FREEDOM to “dress them up” with their own content.

This is much easier (and fun) for you, and much more enjoyable for them.

You can think of it of setting their minds free from the rigid chain of command.

Learn How:

Hypnotic Storytelling

Develop Massive Female Confidence

All Girls Want You

Most guys think that walking up and number closing hundreds of girls will build up their confidence.

It can, but it requires CONSTANT motivation.

Meaning if you stop doing it for a week, it will seem incredibly hard to get started again.

But think of it from another perspective.

Our brains tend to generalize, delete, and distort.

Meaning our brains are incredibly fast, but not very accurate.

So whenever we see a new situation, our brains automatically reference our memories to get an idea of how to feel about it.

Let’s say you are trying the cold approach method of increasing confidence.

Every time you go to approach a new girl, you are going to automatically remember the last couple hundred girls you approached.

And you’ll do so within a few milliseconds. (Fast but inaccurate).

And then your brain will come back with a “feeling” indicating whether it (your brain) thinks it’s “safe” or not.

And what was the result of the last couple hundred cold approaches?

Even the best cold approachers have about an eighty percent FAILURE rate.

So the “feeling” you get back is going to say “DANGER!”

Every. Single. Time.

This is precisely you need so much motivation.

Luckily, this isn’t the ONLY way to build confidence.

Consider the “hit and run” approach.

This also requires that you interact with girls, either verbally or non verbally.

But you ONLY do so until you get a POSITIVE response from her.

THEN you eject. IMMEDIATELY.

It’s important you eject RIGHT WHEN you get any kind of positive signal from her.

This seems counterintuitive and a bit silly.

But consider how you’ll feel after doing this with a few dozen girls.

Your brain will still rapidly scan your past (fast and inaccurate).

But instead of coming back with a feeling that says, “girls mostly reject you, be careful,” it will come back with a MUCH BETTER FEELING.

One that is more like:

“All girls like you.”

Instead of needing momentum, to continually push past the fear of rejection, you’ll feel the positive force of “all girls like you” pulling you forward.

The crucial rule to follow is ALWAYS EJECT as soon as you get a positive “ping” from her.

Start with eye contact, move up to smiles, and then SHORT conversations.

As you as you get her laughing and smiling, BEFORE you number close, LEAVE.

This will create a fantastic feeling of “All girls want me!”

And when you get to THAT level, the world will be your playground.

Click Here To Learn How

Get Them Competing For You

Get Girls Competing For You

Why do girls flake?

The biggest reason is that they have low interest.

As much as guys like to think otherwise, the way a girl behaves around you is HIGHLY DEPENDENT on her interest level in you.

Compare how she behaves around a good looking, tall, athletic rich guy, compared to some homeless guy.

(Don’t worry, you don’t need to be tall, good looking, athletic or rich).

They say you can judge people by how they treat the “help.”

Meaning how well they treat people they DON’T need to be nice to.

But even then that’s not a great gauge.

There’s polite behavior, and there’s behavior that’s driven by attraction and desire.

And if a girl has attraction and desire for you, she’ll behave VERY WELL.

Meaning she won’t flake, she won’t be late, she won’t stare at her phone when she’s with you.

She (the very same girl) will do ALL these things with a guy she has little or no interest in.

The way most guys go about doing this is backwards.

They walk up to dozens of girls, get a bunch of numbers, and hope that eventually one of them will have “high interest.”

This strategy DOES work. Because there ARE plenty of girls out there that WILL have high interest in you naturally.

But finding them can be a real chore. Even if one out of ten girls will really like you the way you are, going through nine rejections is pretty tough.

A much better strategy is to slowly change how you naturally are. Change your outlook, change the way you view the world and your place in it.

If you do that, then you’ll slowly increase the percentage of girls who like the NATURAL YOU.

And once you cross a specific tipping point, THEY will compete for YOU.

Click Here To Learn More

Massive Self Confidence

How To Get Six Pack Confidence

There’s always been a debate about what makes up our “humanness.”

We know we are “animals” like all of other “animals.”

We share internal organs, brain, blood, bones, skin, etc.

But why are humans SO much different?

One thing is that we are self-aware.

Another is that we can speak.

Another, more important thing, is we can learn.

Not just simple things, like fetching a ball or simple sign language.

But complex things like the mathematics to describe space travel.

Science to understand medicine, so one “brain” can operate on another “brain.”

We also have a lot of instincts.

We are naturally frightened of certain things, and we are naturally drawn to certain things.

When you smell a particular odor, you don’t need to “think” how to respond.

It happens automatically.

Athletes have known for centuries that you can “train” in new “instincts.”

This is the whole gimmick behind both “Karate Kid” movies.

Wax on, wax off, until it’s programmed into the muscle memory.

Some things, we learn once, and that’s it.

Once you learn how to ride a bike, or how to tie your shoes, you’ll never need to “re-learn.”

But other things, usually things that involve interacting with other people, aren’t like that.

These are kind of like endurance.

If you started jogging every day, it might take a while before you could run 10K in less than 45 minutes.

And you’d have to KEEP jogging every day to maintain that level of endurance.

Nobody thinks, before they start any physical training program, that they will get to a level where it will become “permanent” and they can STOP exercising.

If you want to get a six pack, it’s going to take effort to GET IT, and it’s going to take effort to MAINTAIN IT.

Social confidence is the same thing. It’s not “set and forget” like riding a bike.

It’s not a certain technique that you “learn how” to do.

There ARE techniques that ARE simple to learn, but they require a certain level of social confidence to do.

For example, it’s pretty simple to learn how to use your gestures effectively, to communicate on a subconscious level.

To get whoever is listening to you (individual or group) to take a certain action.

But in order to be able to DO that certain technique, you’ve got to have a base level of social confidence.

Luckily, there are plenty of exercises that will let you GET that much social confidence, and KEEP it when you get there.

Just like a six pack or a sub-45 minute 10K.
Click Here To Learn How

Social Confidence

Expand Your Social Universe

Imagine if you lived in a large city, but you only went up and down three big boulevards.

Whenever you thought about going shopping, you’d only think of the stores on those streets.

Whenever you thought of checking out a band or seeing a movie, you’d only imagine what was available on those three streets.

Whenever your imagination drifted to the weekend, and you started to daydream about what you were going to do, it would ONLY cover those three streets.

A goofy example, right?

One of the common things they do in hypnosis training is to get people to forget letters or numbers.

Then they say the alphabet, without the vowels, for example, with a straight face.

Or they count to ten without five, thinking it’s normal.

Everybody watches and giggles.

But it’s really a metaphor for how we live.

Most people are interested in hypnosis so they can hypnotize others, or hypnotize themselves and get rid of some of the junk they’ve been carrying around.

But maybe the BEST thing you can do is to first DE-Hypnotize yourself.

So you can see MORE of the stuff that’s around you.

Because the guy in the three boulevard universe is not so far from the truth.

Most of us go to the same places, do the same things, talk to the same people.

Even about the same topics.

Consider that doing things specifically that you AREN’T comfortable doing can be a useful exercise in de-hypnotizing yourself.

Just going places you’ve never gone, or eating at new restaurants or going to new bars can be helpful.

But what is MOST helpful is to talk to people you’ve never talked to before.

Most of us are VERY closed minded. We tend to hang out with people with similar ideas and beliefs, so we reinforce those similar ideas and beliefs.

Pretty soon we think THOSE IDEAS are all that’s out there.

But there is much more than you could EVER discover.

Of course, you won’t get any ideas from buildings. Concrete can’t talk.

But the people there can.

And you’ll be AMAZED at some of the treasure people have to share.

But they won’t come to you.

You must go to them. When you do, you’ll realize it’s well-worth the journey.

Click Here To Learn More

Destroy The Evil One

How To Easily Kill Fear

Reframes can be very powerful.

Especially if after the reframe things seem a lot easier.

Because when we humans give meaning to something, even if the meaning isn’t true, we act as if it is.

This happens under hypnosis all the time.

People can be hypnotized to think a lemon is a cheeseburger.

And when they eat the lemon whole, (in front of stunned observers) it tastes just like a cheeseburger.

Even after, when they KNOW they’ve been hypnotized, they remember it as a cheeseburger.

They “meaning” of that thing they were holding was not a sour citrus fruit, but their favorite food.

We do this to ourselves all the time, but in the opposite direction.

Sometimes before we do something, we imagine it’s going to be really, really scary.

And often times, this keeps us from doing it.

But if we do it anyway (feel the fear and do it anyway) then we realize there was nothing to fear in the first place.

While this technique works (to conquer false fears) it’s not very efficient.

This is why Milton Erickson ditched this method when he invented “Ericksonian Hypnosis” or covert hypnosis.

He used to have his clients to all kinds of crazy things to prove their fears weren’t real.

But then he learned how to destroy their fears by telling stories.

This is the power of reframing.

You can reframe things FIRST without having to “prove” the reframe.

This is essentially what the “feel the fear and do it anyway” theory is.

You reframe the fear through action.

But it’s just as effective (and much more comfortable) to reframe the fear by trying on different thoughts in different combinations.

This way, you can realize things are safe and enjoyable BEFORE needing to prove it.

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Social Confidence

How To Become Master Of The Universe

One famous expression or “truism” from NLP is “The map is not the territory.”

What does this mean?

Any map of reality we have is not reality itself.

We perceive the world through a very small window.

We only consciously see one out of every 25,000 bits of information.

If you count all the data hitting all of our senses, that’s how the ratio breaks down.

Our “pre-conscious processor” has to figure out what’s important, and what’s not important.

It also keeps us safe as best it can.

Unfortunately, it follows the “better safe than sorry” strategy.

Which is why we jump at shadows, an unexpected hand on our shoulder, even if the doorbell rings.

It also keeps us oblivious to things that MIGHT be dangerous.

Some things like snakes and vampires are PURE danger. So our pre-conscious processor forces them into our awareness so we an run.

But some things are only dangerous if we INTERACT with them.

So just to play it safe, it doesn’t allow us to even notice them.

Which means that most of us are working with incomplete and distorted maps of reality.

Our maps filter our own fears and biases.

Whenever we describe reality metaphorically, this is also a map.

Like, for example, in the LOA, they say “radiate your desires and the universe will provide them.”

Clearly, this is pretty vague. It sounds cool, but it doesn’t explain exactly HOW to do that.

How does one radiate, anyhow? And where exactly in the VAST UNIVERSE will our “desires” be provided? Somewhere out by Saturn? Jupiter?

I take this to mean by “radiating” we share our desires. We talk about them, plan them, take steps to make them happen. Demonstrate to the world that we are actively building them.

What about the “Universe?” Do we need to build a spaceship to go out and get our stuff?

I take “The Universe” to mean all the other people we interact with.

Unfortunately, if your preconscious processor is keeping you from noticing those same people, (because part of you doesn’t feel totally confident around strangers) you’ll be missing out on a LOT of opportunity.

Luckily, if you shift your mind slightly so you have a more ACCURATE map of reality, life will be a lot more fulfilling.

Click Here to Learn More

Social Confidence

Destroy Fear of Rejection

Having more resources is better than having less resources.

If you were having a party, you might consider all the snacks and drinks at your place as resources.

If you were going shopping, you might consider a fat wallet a resource.

If you needed a date on short notice, you might consider all the girls’ numbers in your phone as potential resources.

Some things can switch from being burdens to resources.

Like you might consider a garage full of junk as a burden. Every time you look at them piled up in the corner you’d get a bit of anxiety. Maybe realize that some day you’re going to have to clean up all that junk.

But then you decide to have a garage sale. You move all the junk from the back out to your driveway.

Maybe you make a couple hundred bucks. Not only did all the bargain shoppers pay you for your junk, but they took it away for you as well.

Many people look at other people with a mix of desire and anxiety.

On the one hand, they look pretty cool, and might make good friends or potential lovers.

But on the other hand, they could represent potential rejection.

Depending on your background and history, you might have more of one than the other.

You probably know a few people who LOVE groups of people.

They see them as PURE resources. Nothing negative. Only potential positive.

This, of course, tends to be a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Because they’re looking over the crowd with a positive expectation, they send out a certain “energy.”

So when they interact with people, that positive “energy” tends to generate the result they expect.

Luckily, being able to project that “positive energy” is a skill.

Meaning no matter where you are on the spectrum, you can tilt the scale in your favor.

Until you see EVERYBODY as pure potential. Positive resources you can “use” for any occasion.

Friends, business partners, lovers, whatever you want.

Click Here To Learn How

Social Confidence

Cut Yourself Loose

When I was in high school, I loved science, but my math sucked.

Because I sucked at math, every time I thought about science I had a mix of positive appreciation and negative anxiety.

Then later in college, I went through the same scenario as I kept going through tougher and tougher physics courses.

But once I’d figured out the math, I could enjoy the science without any negative anxiety.

I would actually watch these beginning physics shows on TV. My roommates thought I was crazy, but for me it was pretty cool.

I’m sure you’ve heard the metaphor about the elephant.

When he was a kid, they kept him tied up. But when he was fully grown, they removed the rope.

But since he’d been conditioned to believe the limitations (the rope) was there, when they removed it he never went outside that small circle.

Even though the rope was gone, his belief that it was still there kept him trapped in that small circle.

When you were very young, you were very outgoing. Socially fearless. If something was wrong, you would scream your brains out.

If you were happy, you would laugh your brains out.

But then the adults starting putting those constraints on you. To keep you quiet. To keep you from causing problems.

This happens to all of us.

But here we are as adults, and those constraints aren’t there any more.

But just like the elephant, because we BELIEVE they are there, we act as if they ARE there.

The elephant my think about going outside his circle, he may WANT to go outside his circle, but his fear of the rope keeps him stuck.

Fortunately, we humans are a bit smarter than elephants. We can look back and understand that our situations when we were kids are MUCH DIFFERENT than they are now.

There is NO NEED to feel any social fear at all. No logical reason.

But just knowing this doesn’t help. Because our fears operate on a subconscious level.

And only by going down and rearranging them, and then coming back up, can we live life without any social fear or anxiety whatsoever.

Once you’re able to cut yourself loose from the false fears programmed into your brain when you were a toddler, life will be fun and exciting.

You’ll be able to act without fear, behave and communicate in any way you want, and create the life you desire.

Click Here to learn more.