Author Archives: mindpersuasion

Two Crucial Criteria That Make Dating Much Easier

These Two Things Will Make Everything Easier

Get Rid Of Approach Anxiety

What goes through your mind when you approach a girl? If you approach girls. Many guys don’t. Or they wait until they are introduced, or they meet them through social circles, or they meet them online.

But being able to approach girls you find interesting, and start conversations with them is a very wonderful skill to have.

Now, many guys approach girls, but they find the process incredible nerve racking. Meaning they’ve got to warm themselves up. They’ve got to have a couple of drinks. They’ve got to go out with their buddies and make sure they’ve always got moral support.

That’s certainly better than never approaching, but that mind set has several limitations. One is that you are going out specifically to meet girls. This means it’s going to be very hard to be spontaneous. 

Imagine you hook up with your dream girl this way. You get married, have a bunch of kids, and you’re sitting their with your grand kids.

“Grandma, how’d you and grandpa meet?”

“Oh, he was so sweet. I was downtown in the local meet market, and he came up with his buds, all hammered, and spit out some pretty sweet game on me. He kept negging me and doing some crazy ‘push-pull’ that had me ALL confused!”

I hate to break it to you, but this isn’t how most girls dream of meeting their soul mates.

They’d like to believe that it “just happened.” They’d much rather believe you came up to them in the library, or the coffee shop, or some bookstore. And they knew you were interested, and you knew they knew, etc.

In order for THAT to happen, you’ve got to ditch the idea of “going out to meet girls” and embrace the idea of just living your life, and talking to girls you find attractive and interesting as a normal course of who you are.

Which means if you’re hanging out in a coffee shop (not to meet girls but just because you like to chill in that particular environment) and you see a cutie, you simply start a conversation and see what happens.

If she seems interested and game, you keep talking. If she pulls back, closes off, or doesn’t want to be bothered, you eject quickly AND politely. No harm, no foul.

One of the biggest mistakes guys have is not having any criteria. Meaning they see a cute girl, and they suddenly accept her just the way she is, before they even meet her.

Then when they walk up, it’s a matter of getting “accepted” or “rejected.”

But consider this, one of your most important criteria should be that SHE be open enough, self confident enough, and spontaneous enough to at least talk to you for a couple of minutes. On top of that, another important criterion is that she be interested in you enough to keep talking, or exchange numbers to talk some more, later on.

If she doesn’t meet these two criteria, then she doesn’t qualify. Nothing wrong with that.

So instead of going over and hoping you get accepted, go over just to find out what’s what.

It will make it a lot easier.

Do You Wish Instead of Choose?

You May Be Waiting A Long Time For The Birthday Fairy

Strong Choices Are Like Magic

What’s the difference between a wish and a choice?

Way back when I was in college, I had this foolish notion that as soon as I got my degree, employers would start banging down my door begging to hire me.

This does happen in the movies, and when you’ve got the right degree and the economy is red hot, this can happen.

But not usually.

Shortly after college I started sending out resumes by the dozens, and had to work a couple of crap jobs before I settled into the beginnings of what would be a pretty decent career.

But even then it didn’t just “happen.” I had to actively participate.

Now, this may sound obvious, but often times we kind of neglect the “actively participate” part.

We “wish,” meaning we imagine that somebody is just going to show up and take care of things.

Nathaniel Brandon, a famous psychologist who’s written tons of self-help books, had this big sign in his office back when he did therapy.

“Nobody Is Coming.”

This, of course, was to remind his clients that the only person who was going to make things happen was them.

Sure, people win the lottery every day. People get discovered on the street by movie producers. People bump into their dream lovers at the supermarket and the pieces just kind of automatically fit together.

But if your main strategy is to simply “get lucky,” you may be waiting a while.

The main difference between a wish and choice is one of responsibility. When we wish, we’re really waiting for somebody (or the world in general) to give us something.

When we choose, we know that it’s up to us.

Now, many people are scared to choose. Because if we choose something and we can’t get it, that means we pretty much suck, and we’d better get our cardboard box ready, right?

Nope.

Simply the act of choosing fires up different brain circuits than wishing.

Wishing lives in the childhood part of our brains, when we expect to simply “receive.”

But choosing is for grownups. Grownups who know that ever action is beneficial.

Every action yields some kind of result. Every result gives us more information.

And the more information and experience we gain, the better and more effectively we can “operate” on the world to create our choices.

In the Prosperity Program, you’ll get a dual induction hypnosis session designed to take any wish, no matter how big, and how matter how vague, and turn it into a choice.

A powerful choice that will inspire you to action.

The natural action that will manifest your desires.

Ease Your Way Up The Dating Ladder

One Rung At A Time

One Step At A Time

Many guys tell themselves they’d like to get better at talking to girls. Getting their numbers, going on dates, and creating relationships. Then they go out with their buddies, maybe think about approaching, and try something. Then they get blown out, and go home.

While it’s admirable to want to improve your skills in any areas, you’ve got to go about it the right way.

The dating forums are filled with angry guys who’ve tried a few times, didn’t get what they wanted, and then figured the game was rigged, or the world is not worth dating, or any other narrative that protects their ego.

But think of it this way. Imagine you wanted to learn to play the piano. So you went and bought yourself an expensive keyboard. Then you bought a songbook by Bach or some other master composer.

Without even learning how to hold your fingers correctly, you opened your songbook to some random page, and tried to interpret those crazy looking squiggly lines, and started banging away.

Your friends (whom you’d invited to give you moral support) started laughing hysterically. Or maybe they tried to give you some advice. Or maybe they told you that all pianos were rigged somehow, and you had to be some kind of insider to know how to play them correctly.

Does this sound like a great way to learn the piano? Of course it doesn’t.

Things like learning music, or a language or a martial art, take time. We know they take time.

In fact, if you have ZERO knowledge of any kind of martial art, how long before you’d be ready to enter into a black belt level tournament?

At least a couple years. A couple years of dedicated practice, focused exercises, and serious dieting.

Talking to girls is no different. You don’t start at the top level. You don’t go the hottest bars in town, talk to the hottest girls, and expect to get some decent results.

Social skills are learned skills. Sure, some people are naturally good, just like some people are naturally gifted in music or sports.

But that doesn’t mean you can’t learn how to play.

How do you learn seduction?

Same way you’d learn anything else. Start slow. Practice consistently. Give yourself plenty of time.

The best way to start to practice your social skills is to simply talk to people. Any time you see somebody that might be interesting, simply start up a conversation, and see what happens.

If you do this regularly, like working out at the gym, you will improve.

Get started.

Go Slow Baby!

Slow And Steady

Use Your Skills!

What’s the difference between somebody that doesn’t read and somebody who can’t?

Nothing.

Skills can be useless unless you put them into action. Now, some people tell themselves things like, “Well, if I wanted to I could, but right now I really don’t want to.”

Like they see an attractive person across the room. They imagine the best case scenario, and tell themselves they COULD do that if they wanted to, but for some reason, they don’t want to.

There are many variations of this, but they’re really the same. We see something we want, we know what action to take, but we are afraid. So we come up with a story to tell ourselves that keeps us from taking action.

It’s funny when we hear this from others, it sounds like pure BS. But from ourselves, it sounds totally logical.

Part of the problem lies in the fact that we imagine where we are now, and where we want to be.

Then we imagine some HUGE action that needs to be taken, in order to get what we want.

Then we imagine the worst case scenario, which is failing miserably.

And if we set our sites on what we want, and take action, and FAIL, what does that say about us?

Most of us would rather pretend that we’ll take action “someday.”

Only that day never comes.

There are two HUGE fallacies in the argument presented above.

The first is that there are WAAAAY more steps from where we are to where we want to be than we imagine.

The second that if we don’t get what we want RIGHT AWAY, we somehow “fail.” This is just nuts.

Imagine you wake up in the middle of the night, and you need to hit the toilet. You stand up, and fumble around on the wall for the light switch.

You slap around the wall until you find the outer edges of the fixture, then find the switch, and turn it on.

How many hand movements did it take? Probably a lot. Was each hand movement that DIDN’T land on the light switch a FAILURE?

Only if you somehow convinced yourself that the Earth was going to explode if you didn’t hit that switch perfectly the first time.

The TRUTH about humans and our interactions with the reality around is that EVERYTHING is like that.

We take action, we get feedback, and then based on that feedback, we take more action.

All along redefining our targets, goals and objectives.

We will keep doing that until we’re dead.

Life is a process. A journey. A path of self discovery and creation.

The small steps you take today will resonate FAR into your future. 

They don’t have to big steps. Whatever you’re comfortable with.

Get started:

Prosperity Generator

How To Get A Girlfriend

Everything's Easier When You Follow A Blueprint

Anything’s Easy With Proper Planning

No matter what you want in life, you’ll never get there if you don’t know what you want.

I know, sounds like one of those catch-22’s. But consider this. All humans come preprogrammed with certain desires, that drive our instincts. Most of these instincts are shut off unless they are in the presence of our corresponding desires.

Once something is present that can satisfy one of these desires, we feel an almost uncontrollable urge to take certain action, based on our environment, in order to satisfy that particular desire.

Consider food. I’m sure you’ve had the experience if not being hungry, and then suddenly you smell something really good. Then all you can think about is food. If you are near the food, and it’s available, it’s nearly impossible to not eat it.

Like maybe you’re going to a party, and you don’t really feel like eating anything. But when you get there, there’s a MASSIVE spread of good stuff. Then you simply can’t help yourself.

Sure, you may tell yourself some stories like, “I don’t want to be rude,” or “Well, since they went to the trouble,” or, “I just felt like eating.”

But in reality, your inner caveman saw and opportunity to eat, and took over.

Same goes with seeing attractive girls or any other “trigger” that jump starts out caveman brain.

If you ONLY go by your caveman brain, you may get lucky, you may not.

Only if you take the time to decide what you want, and plan your life accordingly, do you have any hope of escaping the “I hope I get lucky” trap.

For example, let’s say you wanted to lose weight. So you bought a couple diet books. You decided to ditch all your food at home that didn’t fit your new diet plan. Then you carefully went shopping for only the foods that would support your new diet. And you avoided restaurants and fast food places as much as you could.

This, of course, would make it a lot easier to lose weight, or get in shape.

Most people realize this. And they realize it would take time. Plenty of time.

But for some reason, when we think of relationships, we expect it to “just happen.”

We don’t plan what kind of relationship we want, or the type of person we want it with, or where we might meet them.

We just show up and hope for the best.

That would be like going to McDonalds, ordering a couple of super size Big Mac packs, and hoping you might get lucky and get that six pack.

Take some time. Choose the kind of girl you’d like. Figure out how you’ll know her when you see her.

And go talk to her. Keep this up, and pretty soon you’ll have a nice relationship.

The Coming Storm

Are You Ready For What's Coming?

Are You Ready?

I remember watching that movie “Ice Age” a long time ago.

That one squirrel who couldn’t the nut out of the ice was the best part, IMO.

Anyhow, the movie was about a real ice age that happened 10-15K years ago. Now when ice ages come, they don’t show up over night. It’s not like you go to sleep one night when it’s all sunny and wake up and everything’s frozen.

But it does happen quickly. Quickly enough that the people at the time knew it was a good idea to get the heck out of dodge.

Now, whether or not they fully understood what was happening and why it was happening is open to debate.

But they did know it was getting colder. Then they’d move a little bit, to a warmer place. Then that place would start getting colder. Those that didn’t respond to the changing environment didn’t do very well.

Since all the animals were doing the same thing, those that figured they’d just “suck it up” and stay where they were soon found there was nothing to eat in addition to the colder and colder temperatures.

One of the biggest skills you can develop as a human is to accept the changing conditions, and respond accordingly.

If you figure you’ll “suck it up” hoping things will magically get better, they usually won’t.

The most successful people of all time realized that you can never really let your guard down. You’ve got to keep your eyes and ears peeled not only for opportunities, but for advancing dangers.

Economic changes don’t really happen over night. Sure, they’re easy to pinpoint a couple of decades or more after they’ve run their cycle, but not when you’re smack dab in the middle of one.

It’s like a line I like from the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie.

The Heroine looks at the bad guy (a ghost pirate) and says:

“But I don’t believe in ghost stories!”

To which he replies:

“Well ya best believe in ’em, cause you’re IN one!”

People that wait to be told what to do may be waiting a while.

But those that can sense changes coming, and act accordingly, usually do pretty well.

Because in every crisis, in every dramatic change, expected or not, welcomed or not, lies HUGE opportunities.

Will you see them?

Will you act on them?

Then this is for you:

Prosperity Generator

Rules For Dating

Are You In Or Are You Out?

Skyrocket Your Attraction

A while back, there was a famous book for girls and dating, called “The Rules.”

Basically game for girls. Rules about not calling, when to should go out, etc. Basically ways to make the guy more attracted using ancient laws of influence, like scarcity, commitment and consistency, etc.

To be sure, understanding these are fantastic. They can help out a lot, not only in dating, but in life as well. But if you are using them on purpose, that’s when things get kind of squirrely.

Any time you have to use your conscious brain to alter your behavior in order to elicit a behavior from somebody, it can backfire.

These techniques work really well in sales for a couple of reasons. One is that you are using these to boost the “attraction” they have for your product, not you.

Which means it is a lot easier, since you can both see the product objectively. And when they buy the product, they can take it home, and it will still be the product. And assuming it’s a good product, not some fake piece of junk, they won’t get angry.

The other reason is when you’re selling a product, you only have to put on your “game face” for a short time. Maybe an hour or two, tops. This is true even when you are selling a $50,000 car. Much less if you’re selling a cell phone or some other electronics.

But consider using these techniques with girls. They’ll be attaching their feelings to you. Which means you’d better consistently follow up, and deliver the value you are covertly promising.

Also, it’s not like you only have to do this for a couple hours, like selling a car. You need to keep it up for a long, long time. As soon as you stop, you may be in trouble.

A much better set of “rules for guys” are disqualification rules. If these rules are applied, then you’ll never see her again. Instead of using some fake rules to increase her attraction, just use some real rules that you stick to, no matter what.

A list of things she has to have about her. And a list of things that she can’t have about her.

Stick to these rules, and simply be yourself, your real self, not some fake nice-guy self.

The thing about most guys is they HAVE no rules. Not conscious ones anyway. So when they walk up to her, she can kind of sniff the desperation.

But with some solid rules, you won’t have any desperation. Only some curiosity. Curiosity to find out whether or not can follow your rules or not.

And this will definitely increase your attraction.

Do You Have Guiding Principles?

What Does Ben Franklin Know About Money

Both Positive and Negative

What is the prime directive of your life?

I used to be (still am) a HUGE fan of Star Trek. The old ones, new ones, pretty much all of them.

When they would visit a primitive planet, they had to follow the “Prime Directive,” their most important rule.

Since they were explorers, always going new places, they needed a rule to guide them. And this rule was to observe, but never interfere. Meaning if they found a bunch of cavemen running around throwing rocks at each other, they couldn’t beam down and give them all advanced weapons.

Having rules to live by can make it pretty simple, especially when we get into tough situations.

However, most of the time the “rules” are really pretty flexible, meaning that they can be broken, and often times should be broken.

Of course, some rules are pretty universal, like don’t kill, don’t steal, etc. These show up in all cultures.

But these are rules that are society wide, and apply to everybody. Certainly there are special cases.

On an individual level, having rules is also helpful.

Many movie characters have personal rules they live by. These are usually based on experience.

Many people also have personal rules. Never kiss on the first date. Never give out my phone number to strangers. Never buy something more than $100 on impulse, etc.

Most rules are meant to protect us. To keep us from stepping over the line, or getting in over our heads.

But what about rules that help us? To make sure we take opportunities when they are presented?

One famous “rule” is by Ben Franklin, that old school kite flying guy who ended up on the $100 bill.

“Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.”

Not exactly a rule, more like a guideline.

But what the heck does waking up early have to do with becoming wealthy?

Does it give you more hours of labor? Does going to bed early give you better sleep so you’ll be more efficient on the job?

Maybe, but I don’t think that’s what he was getting at.

I think what he meant was that it’s better to plan your life with your conscious mind, and not live according to your instincts.

For example, if we ONLY did what we “felt” like doing, we’d sleep in every day, and stay up until dawn.

By CHOOSING to go to sleep early, and CHOOSING to wake up early, we are showing dedication to creating something.

Now, I’m not saying that going to bed early or waking up early is the magic cure for everything.

But from a big picture view, the more you can choose and plan your life consciously, the more money you’ll make, and the smarter you’ll become.

Live awake and on purpose, and get rich.

Live asleep and unconscious, and get just enough to scrape by.

Which do you prefer?

The Trifecta Of Magic Relationship Generation

Have Yourself A Three Way!

One Thing – Three Benefits

There’s one thing that will skyrocket your game more than anything else.

This one thing will not only eliminate approach anxiety, but will make you much more attractive. And it will allow you to get girls that are much closer to what you’re looking for.

What’s more, the more you do this, the less chances you’ll get emotionally destroyed like some guys.

What is this thing?

Criteria.

Now, most guys don’t have ANY conscious criteria when looking for girls. All they need is that she be above a certain level of attractiveness, and she like him enough to date him and sleep with them.

Beyond that, they’re pretty much OK with anything. 

The funny thing about humans (both men AND women) is we are REALLY good at reverse rationalization. Now, many guys think this is purely a female trait, but in truth, we both do it. In fact, many neuro-biologists are starting to think one of the main purposes of the conscious mind is to be some kind of after the fact story teller. Making up stuff so our subconscious behavior fits into some kind of narrative that won’t drive us crazy.

How does this present itself in guys?

We see a girl, know absolutely nothing about her. We sleep with her. We still know pretty much nothing about her. But since our caveman brains are hard wired to do ANYTHING to keep a steady supply of sex close at hand, we’ll make up all kinds of stories about her that make her sound like the “perfect girl for us.”

No matter what her personality is like, no matter what she wants to do with her life, we somehow believe that’s EXACTLY the kind of girl we were looking for.

But this is just a self-hypnotic con. This is also why many relationships crash and burn. After that initial self-hypnosis wears off, we finally see who we’ve been with. And when we find we don’t have much in common, AND we aren’t sexually attracted any more, there’s no reason to stick around.

From both the male AND the female perspective.

How do we avoid this?

Simple. Have a list of non-physical criteria, AND the stones to act on it BEFORE you sleep with her.

Meaning if you meet an attractive lady who’s good to go, but she doesn’t meet your criteria, you’ve GOT to disqualify her.

This will make approaching girls easier since you aren’t sure if they’re qualified or not.

This will make you much more attractive because you’ll be a lot less needy and desperate.

This will make it less likely to get burned later as you’ll end up with somebody you’re actually compatible with.

Try it, and see.

Are You Truly Open To Receive?

Life Is All Give and Get

Ditch Those False Fears And Receive Truth

There’re a lot of ways we humans deceive ourselves.

In order to protect our egos, we tend see things that aren’t there, and not see things that are there.

One thing humans are pretty terrified of is risk. We don’t like doing something when we don’t know what’s going to happen.

It’s very common to think about doing something, or maybe even start doing something, and then the doubts start.

We start to worry about what people will think when they see us.

To be sure, the opinion of others is a HUGE motivating factor in pretty much everything we do.

Even when we’re alone, we can imagine that people are watching us and judging us.

Like if I told you right now the secret of getting rich quick was to hop on one foot in your room while slapping your belly and singing happy birthday in the highest voice possible, you wouldn’t do it.

Even if you saw video proof of money magically appearing, you’d start to do it, and then suddenly “feel stupid” as if the whole world was watching you.

Now, I’m not saying there’s any kind of magic money secret, but I’m sure you know the feeling of “feeling stupid” as if somebody were watching. Even when you’re all alone.

The truth is that social pressure can be wonderful and terrible. 

Long long time ago, our “tribe” was crucial to our survival. So if they started to gossip about us, or talk smack about us, we were in very bad shape.

And if they thought we were the bomb, we could get a lot more stuff (resources and love).

So Mother Nature gave us this super-hyper-sensitivity to the opinion of others. (Gee, thanks!)

This can be hard to shake.

So in order to avoid this at all costs, we tell ourselves all kinds of lies to keep us safe. To keep us from taking any action that might bring us some negative feedback from our peers.

From looking stupid.

We even spend thousands of dollars on seminars, techniques and secret methods passed down through the generations to avoid taking any kind of risk.

And looking stupid.

But here’s the thing. Most of your fears are false. Meaning that unless you are jumping off a cliff with a bunch of flying rattlesnakes chasing you, what you’re afraid of isn’t real.

And here’s another thing. Usually, when we’re scared of something that’s not real, we imagine something horrible happening.

But when we embrace our fears, walk right through them and do the thing anyway, usually the OPPOSITE of our fears take place.

In our minds, we are terrified of feedback.

But in reality, feedback is essential to our success. It tells us what works, so we can do more. It tells us what doesn’t work, so we can do less.

When you “open yourself to receive,” what you’re telling the world is that you’ll not only accept good feedback, but “negative” feedback as well.

When that happens, wonderful things happen.

Get Started:

Prosperity Generator